Solange's Health Scare Is A Reminder To Us All To Check On That "Strong" Friend
Solange has always been a bigger sister - stylish, articulate, bold, and mysterious.
Her album A Seat At The Table evoked emotions that all of us gave home to in the basements of our soul. Her style challenges us to explore the romance of being our authentic selves. Her visual artistry reminds us of our inner ancestral power, our inner artist, and our inner leader. Her growth throughout the years has been a testament to our own growth. And lastly, when we root for Solange, we root for ourselves.
It's safe to say that Solange has consistently been the strong friend, in the long-distance sisterhood we all have with the women who inspire us.
In a recent Instagram post, Solange regretfully announced her cancellation of her AfroPunk JoBurg 2017 performance in South Africa because of an illness she has been suffering from for months. She revealed that she has been dealing with an autonomic disorder.
"The past five months I have been quietly treating, and working through an autonomic disorder. It been a journey that hasn't been easy on me... Sometimes I feel cool, and other times not so cool at all. It's a complicated diagnoses, and I'm still learning so much myself, but right now, my doctors are not clearing me for such an extended lengthy flight, and doing a rigorous show right after."
The autonomic disorder that Solange speaks of is a broad term for the autonomic nervous system. There are multiple types of disorders of ANS, but they all come down to the same basics: the ANS regulates the body's internal organs, so when important functions like the heart aren't being properly regulated, it leads to problems with heart rate, blood pressure, and digestion.
Solange has always been open and transparent about her expression - it's one of the reasons why we've grown to love her as a woman, a mother, a wife, a sister, a friend, an artist, and a human being. It was surprising to learn of such an intimate situation with her health. And it speaks to the reality about how we overlook the possibilities of reality for certain people in our life.
The strong friend is usually the one who bleeds in silence.
The strong friend, who is on a pedestal by those around them, is often overlooked because they are expected to be fine. Their strength is often confused with their ability to carry more pain. How often do we call that one person to discuss our pain, bare it on them, and hang up to leave them with the bullets that left our mouth?
So many of our friends clip their own wings to ground themselves in our pain and empathize with us.
For the strong friend in the group, it's often a question of "who heals the healer?" Solange, through her artful existence, takes us through the darkness in ourselves so we can fully embrace our light.
Though a goddess through and through, the revealing of her own illness, a footnote of her humanness, is a reminder that we need to check up on our strong friend, despite their ability to carry the world on their shoulders.
Featured image by Giphy
Olivia Jade is a writer and creative engineer, intersecting wellness, culture, womanism, and self-development. She waters the flowers in her mind so others can recognize their own internal garden. Link up: @akaoliviajade (Twitter and IG) oliviajade.co
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Frustrated With Your Job Search? Here's What One Expert Says You Should Start Doing
Recent LinkedIn findings have confirmed a few telling things about Black job seekers that many of us can probably relate to. Things in the realm of work and career advancement efforts have been shifting for Black professionals, with a majority (90%) considering a job move this year for more money (30%) or a better work-life balance (23%).
In these times of economic uncertainty, Black and Latino professionals are the most likely to consider a job move in 2024, but more than half of Black and Latino professionals “believe that looking for a job is frustrating.”
Despite the challenges, 62% of Black professionals, specifically, are changing their job search strategy to keep up with the changes in the new world of work, and they’re also the “most inclined” to want to find a job that aligns with their values and meets their criteria, the report further indicates.
I caught up with Tyrona Heath (@tyronaheath), director at LinkedIn’s B2B Institute, about strategies to shift your job search approach, what red flags to look out for when it comes to scammy postings, and how LinkedIn’s tools can be helpful in networking and landing your dream gig.
Job Search Tip 1: Don't be shy about marketing yourself and creating a story around whatever it is you offer to the world.
Heath shares that, when approaching your job search, the key is to stand out and be remembered. Candidates have to tap into highlighting what they can uniquely bring to the career opportunity they're pursuing. "Your brand is out front speaking for you when you’re not in the room. An active online presence, especially on LinkedIn, is crucial, as it helps create a natural identity that pulls people in and fosters lasting relationships."
"Use LinkedIn to message connections, have informational interviews, set up alerts, and follow people and companies to stay in the loop," she added. "Just like marketers deliver brand messages, tailor your updates and content to showcase what you know and contribute to the ecosystem. Employers are looking for people with skills to solve problems and identify the next opportunities.
She also noted that 70% of Black professionals "emphasize skills over degrees when job hunting, highlighting the importance of practical abilities increasingly outweighing traditional qualifications."
"Embrace your skills, and don't be afraid to go for those opportunities that might seem a bit out of reach. I always urge people to be really strategic in their search, using filters to narrow down the best roles, but also to make sure candidates aren’t undervaluing their professional experience.
Job Search Tip 2: Take the next step and invest in premium or membership upgrades on job-seeking sites.
"If you are still stuck on what to say to your new connection, LinkedIn’s AI Networking Tool for its premium members helps them craft a personalized message when reaching out to your connection for the first time," Heath said. "After you’ve used some of these tools to make an initial connection, it’s important to continue to tend to your LinkedIn garden. It's not just about planting seeds; it's about nurturing and cultivating relationships over time. Effective networking involves refining your connections and focusing on those that truly matter. By consistently investing in your network, you allow it to flourish and yield fruitful results over time."
Getty Images
Job Search Tip 3: Research prospective employers thoroughly to avoid getting scammed or wasting time applying for a fake job.
"Sadly, more and more job scams appear every day. They are feeding on the increasing innocence of job seekers as the job market continues to fluctuate," Heath said. "To help avoid being a victim to job ghosting, email phishing, and fake remote work opportunities, it is important to research the companies thoroughly and conduct thorough research. With the help of LinkedIn Pages, you can find out the credibility and information about the company, its values, and its commitments.
LinkedIn also has integrated verification directly into job posts, she added, which helps to ensure job seekers are able to get verified information about a company and job poster. "Most importantly, don’t ignore your gut feelings. If you’re getting asked for personal information like your social security number, bank information, or being asked to pay for things yourself, it’s probably a scam," she said. "Receiving an offer after just one interview is also a red flag. Legitimate companies have thorough processes, so if it feels too good to be true, it probably is."
Luis Alvarez/Getty Images
Job Search Tip 4: Still hitting walls? Keep networking with authentic motives, take the focus off the pressure of the process, and find ways to expand your support system.
"I have deep compassion for those who constantly do everything they can do in their power and come up short. You start to feel helpless, and you find yourself stuck in a rut. What you’re feeling is real. We are seeing a tightened job market compared to the past few years," Heath said. "Before, we saw two jobs for every applicant; now it’s the complete opposite. One of the best things to do is expand your circles, relationships, and communities. Not only does this make for a great support system, but it also allows for the potential for opportunities you may not have uncovered otherwise. Your next job could be brought to you by your connection’s connection’s connection."
You can use platforms like LinkedIn to see who's connected to whom and become industry friends of friends (so to speak) with the network of someone you're already connected to.
Job Search Tip 5: Lean into the right timing for responding to applications, and be flexible. Achieving a big goal can start with consistently achieving a few smaller ones.
"While it’s easy to get hung up on finding the 'perfect' dream job, it’s important to remember that most jobs are vehicles and not destinations," Heath said. "Instead of focusing on this, try to think about what skills you’ll gain from each opportunity and how you can apply those skills and experience to your next opportunity."
She also encourages candidates to be quick on the draw when it comes to responding to job openings. "Applying within the first 10 minutes of receiving a relevant job notification can increase your chances of hearing back by up to four times, so don’t underestimate the importance of being the first to apply."
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Goodboy Picture Company/Getty Images