Solange's Health Scare Is A Reminder To Us All To Check On That "Strong" Friend
Solange has always been a bigger sister - stylish, articulate, bold, and mysterious.
Her album A Seat At The Table evoked emotions that all of us gave home to in the basements of our soul. Her style challenges us to explore the romance of being our authentic selves. Her visual artistry reminds us of our inner ancestral power, our inner artist, and our inner leader. Her growth throughout the years has been a testament to our own growth. And lastly, when we root for Solange, we root for ourselves.
It's safe to say that Solange has consistently been the strong friend, in the long-distance sisterhood we all have with the women who inspire us.
In a recent Instagram post, Solange regretfully announced her cancellation of her AfroPunk JoBurg 2017 performance in South Africa because of an illness she has been suffering from for months. She revealed that she has been dealing with an autonomic disorder.
"The past five months I have been quietly treating, and working through an autonomic disorder. It been a journey that hasn't been easy on me... Sometimes I feel cool, and other times not so cool at all. It's a complicated diagnoses, and I'm still learning so much myself, but right now, my doctors are not clearing me for such an extended lengthy flight, and doing a rigorous show right after."
The autonomic disorder that Solange speaks of is a broad term for the autonomic nervous system. There are multiple types of disorders of ANS, but they all come down to the same basics: the ANS regulates the body's internal organs, so when important functions like the heart aren't being properly regulated, it leads to problems with heart rate, blood pressure, and digestion.
Solange has always been open and transparent about her expression - it's one of the reasons why we've grown to love her as a woman, a mother, a wife, a sister, a friend, an artist, and a human being. It was surprising to learn of such an intimate situation with her health. And it speaks to the reality about how we overlook the possibilities of reality for certain people in our life.
The strong friend is usually the one who bleeds in silence.
The strong friend, who is on a pedestal by those around them, is often overlooked because they are expected to be fine. Their strength is often confused with their ability to carry more pain. How often do we call that one person to discuss our pain, bare it on them, and hang up to leave them with the bullets that left our mouth?
So many of our friends clip their own wings to ground themselves in our pain and empathize with us.
For the strong friend in the group, it's often a question of "who heals the healer?" Solange, through her artful existence, takes us through the darkness in ourselves so we can fully embrace our light.
Though a goddess through and through, the revealing of her own illness, a footnote of her humanness, is a reminder that we need to check up on our strong friend, despite their ability to carry the world on their shoulders.
Featured image by Giphy
Olivia Jade is a writer and creative engineer, intersecting wellness, culture, womanism, and self-development. She waters the flowers in her mind so others can recognize their own internal garden. Link up: @akaoliviajade (Twitter and IG) oliviajade.co
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage