Jada Pinkett Smith Says It Took Her 47 Years To Learn The True Key To Happiness
Perfection is both boring and unattainable, but nevertheless, we try our hardest every day to conceal our broken places.
According to Jada in a recent interview with Stephen Colbert, this mentality ultimately led her to 46 years of unhappiness. As a 47-year-old wife, bonus mom and mother-of-two, Jada said that this is the first time in her life that she's actually happy, and it's all thanks to saying "f*ck it":
"I really thought happiness had a lot to do with pleasure and I realize that happiness is about peace. I'm the most peaceful I've ever been in my life."
I've grown to learn that some of the most beautiful things in life are imperfect AF. Jada can totally relate and tries to keep this same energy when it comes to her marriage, even in not-so-private moments of vulnerability. While The Smiths were previously a fairly tight-lipped Hollywood couple, that all changed with Red Table Talk.
The show currently holds the spot as the most-watched series on Facebook Watch and it's likely because unlike most talk shows, Jada and her family spill quite a bit of their own tea while interviewing their guests. The actress told Stephen that in her world, being transparent was the key to finding inner peace. When asked why it was important for the actress that she and her husband bring their matrimonial mess to the media, Jada had this to say:
"First of all was really to kind of get rid of the idea that people in the public eye have perfect relationships. We were kind of sick of living up to that. We were real sick of it. And then second of all, really having myself and Will come and talk about our relationship — sometimes you see just women do it alone or you just see a guy do it."
Jada explained that while she and Will's goal was to resolve some of their own problems by confronting their past, they soon learned that facing their imperfections in front of the world also inadvertently helped some other relationships, too.
"Us coming together and taking responsibility for both of our parts and also Will being the successful guy that he is and being willing to share what his pitfalls were in the relationship and in his family, you can't imagine how many other successful men called and said, 'Wow, my wife has been saying the same thing for years. Because you said it, it opened my eyes and because you said it, I'm willing to listen.'"
In order to heal, you first have to acknowledge where you are broken, and for both Jada and Will, finding happiness meant making peace with those voids. Take a lesson out of this couple's book and don't let it take half a century to recognize it.
Watch the full clip below!
Jada Pinkett Smith: Happiness Is About Peacewww.youtube.com
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Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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'Power Book II: Ghost' Star LaToya Tonodeo Doesn't Think Her Character's Mom Is A Toxic Parent
The Power Book II: Ghost finale episodes resumed on Friday, Sept 6, and the Tejadas appear to be in deep trouble. Spoiler alert: Diana Tejada, played by LaToya Tonodeo, is pregnant with Tariq St. Patrick's (Michael Rainey Jr.) baby while simultaneously dealing with her family's new arrangement with dirty cop Don Carter (Michael Ealy).
Diana doesn't want her child near the drug game, but due to her family and her child's father's active roles in that lifestyle, she may not have a choice. In a xoNecole exclusive, LaToya opens up about the reality of Diana's options.
"My advice would be like, girl, you better pray about it and make the best decision. But in actuality, like looking at the circumstances, I don't necessarily think it's best for her right now to leave her support system," she admits.
"She needs all the support she can get. It just doesn't make sense. You're saying you don't want Tariq to be a part of the life, but that's clearly what he is doing in his path. And then you're a Tejada, your family is a part of that life. And then you're in school. How are you going to support yourself and a child off the candy store like it's not going to work.
She continues, "So you need to keep, in my opinion, I would say, keep the family as close as you can, because regardless of who they are and how they operate, it's definitely beneficial for her."
"So you need to keep, in my opinion, I would say, keep the family as close as you can, because regardless of who they are and how they operate, it's definitely beneficial for her."
If you watch Power Book II: Ghost, then you are familiar with the family dynamic between the Tejadas. The family's matriarch, Monét, played by R&B legend Mary J. Blige, groomed her kids to be gangsters and help her run their drug empire.
But her parenting has often caused a wedge between her kids Diana, Dru (Lovell Adams-Gray), and Cain (Woody McClain), especially after she killed their father. This led to Diana and Dru recruiting Tariq to kill Monét, but it was unsuccessful and now, Monét is now trying to repair her relationship with her kids.
While Monét ticks off many of the boxes of what a toxic parent may look like, LaToya has another point of view. "I feel like even though, on the outside, it could look like she's a toxic parent, I believe that we try to show that there's still elements of love there, and there are moments where Diana, for the sake of family, still will forgive all the things that, like if she feels blamed for certain things," she explains.
"Like the time, I think it was last season or season three, when Monét actually went into Diana's dorm room and apologized and all the things-- she's okay with it, because Diana really wants family."
She continues, "And at the end of the day, Diana wants her mother to see her. So it might sound toxic to say that I don't believe she's fully toxic, but Diana is okay with giving chances, and maybe that's to her detriment, but she's okay with giving chances, and the growth between them is a push and pull, but Diana needs it."
Watch the full interview below:
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