Should this be more of a romantic rendezvous with your boo thang (because romance occurs within friendships too), sex may or may not be off the table during the sticky days of the lasting summer heat. If so, there’s nothing like a cute, cinema-esque date with your person to add a little razzle-dazzle to this already magical time of year. Upping your chances of making this a whole evening of loving. Yes, if you’re lucky…you might just get lucky (er, luckier) with a little bit of intentional planning.
With that said, for a fun summer date night idea, check out one of these 10 ideas to upgrade you and your date nights throughout the season.
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1. Luxe Picnic
Luxury picnics have trended up over the past couple of years and thankfully so. For all my bougie girls, it’s a real Hilary Banks spin on an old-school concept. You can plan this concept out yourself, however, they have become mainstream. Meaning you can also hire someone to put this fabulous date night (or girls' day) together for you – allowing you to simply show up and enjoy the ambiance.
2. Drive-In Movie/Movie in the Park
A date at the drive-in is a summer classic! And honestly, I’m not sure if they're romantic or the perfect place to hook up – something in me says those old-school movies set in the 40s that showed a couple at a drive-in movie date were hinting at a little more than romance. Still, the bomb thing about this date idea is that it has to occur in the evening which means less sun but packs all the heat (winks) and hopefully a cool breeze.
Another romantic way to capitalize on this vibe is to do a movie date in the park. Many cities offer opportunities for Screen on the Green or cinema in the park during the summertime (Los Angeles has an outdoor cinema year-round called Cinespia that shows classic movies). Though it's not quite as intimate as a drive-in, the experience is a summer date idea worth mentioning.
3. Strawberry Picking
For this summer date idea, you can go strawberry picking or really any type of fruit picking that is local to you. Once you all finish picking the fruit, have a chilled bottle of wine with you to have with your fresh picks. If alcohol is not allowed in the facility, take this opportunity to do a rooftop car picnic or find a nearby lake, field, etc. to set up shop in. (Picture that scene from Jason’s Lyric).
4. Hot Air Balloon Ride
If you’re not afraid of heights, a hot air balloon ride is a mile-high club that seems well worth the experience. Depending on where you live, you may want to go out somewhere scenic to get a really picturesque view down of the city or the rural area below. Allow yourself to be captivated by the flush of golden light from the sunset on the horizon as you experience an adrenaline rush that takes an average date night to new heights. I think this is the perfect intimate outing where there’s less demand for dialogue.
5. Grape Stomping
Because grape stomping, or grape treading, isn’t necessary to make wine these days, consider this a novelty experience. You can sip on some wine while you and your partner stump all on grapes, which weirdly enough seems sticky but refreshing. Once you finish, you and your partner can wipe one another’s feet down and add in a little massage. Look to Airbnb Experiences for grape stomping opportunities that might be near you or someplace you hope to visit with your partner soon. Food & Wine Trails also has a list of the top five regions to visit for grape stomping that you can find here.
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6. Couples Cooking Classes
Beat the heat while making something yummy to eat. Cooking is such an intimate act and when you take the extra step of preparing something you've never cooked before in a class setting, you open up the floor to add some novelty to your date night as well. This also allows you to try something new for the first time together which is a great way to add to your connection. Couples cooking classes are pretty common so you might even be able to find a Groupon or Airbnb Experience for this. However, if you know a chef who you enjoy and can reach out to perfectly that would be even better!
7. Water Balloon Fight
For the goofy couple, who adores embracing their inner child, grab the Super Soakers and water balloons! Not only is this a fun and out-of-the-box way of bonding with your person or people, but it’s also the perfect way to keep cool on a hot summer day. A couple that plays together stays together.
8. Fair/Carnival/Amusement Park
Another activity inspired by throwback TV! Now that the world has opened back up, the go-to fair, carnival, or amusement park date during the summer is having a resurgence. I don’t think it gets more intimate than riding rides and allowing another to hear you scream horrifically at every drop and turn. But furthermore, it allows you all to talk to one another as you keep your feet on the ground and win one another huge teddy bears.
9. Tandem Bike Ride
It doesn’t get more Nicholas Sparks than this! Argue with someone else! Also known as courting bikes, the tandem bicycle is a great way to put a fun and romantic spin on bike riding. You can experience the trails and scenic views with your person slowly and closely, adding a layer of intimacy to bike riding you might not have initially thought of. Find your tandem bike, bring along some wine or champagne, and make a day of it while riding through your city. It's the perfect cycling date.
10. Bonfire
Kisses under the firelight? I can get behind it. Bonfires are also a great activity to do with others if you don’t want to ditch the crew. This is probably perfect for a cooler summer night or even on a beach by the water. Be sure to bring along the smores kit so you can truly make this the top-tier experience you intend it to be.
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On July 5, Mars moves into Taurus until August 20, and there is strong importance on values, comfort, family, satisfaction, and safety right now. While Mars is in Taurus we are motivated to accumulate and indulge a little. Taurus makes us balance our checkbooks, but this sign also loves their pleasure, and with Jupiter moving retrograde this month, we have been reminded of the importance of non-overindulgence. Mars is overall here to give you a clear view of what happiness feels and looks like to you and to allow more of this heart-centered energy into your life, with balance.
Mercury transits both Cancer and Leo this month, and while Mercury is in Cancer until July 19, communications are colored with a more emotional display. Sensitivities are heightened, and overall the gifts are in speaking from the heart right now and gaining emotional understanding. Once Mercury moves into Leo towards the end of the month, the focus turns to self-expression, personal passion, and defining your personal truths. The Full Moon of July is occurring in Capricorn on July 13 and is the Full Buck Moon of the year. This Full Moon is a time to get grounded, release old stories that restrict your beliefs today, write a list of gratitude, and remember what holds value for you.
Chiron and Jupiter both go retrograde in Aries this month at the end of July, and there is healing and divine contemplation that wants to take place now. Over the next few months, revelations will be taking place, and your worldview expands as Jupiter retrograde brings things front and center to be addressed before moving forward again. Jupiter retrograde is about preparing for blessings, redefining your intentions for them, and gaining some spiritual insight through it all. The New Moon in Leo on July 28 is making sure the month ends with a dramatic flair, and fireworks are appearing. The more you keep the faith and believe you deserve all good things this month, the more you are aligned with what is.
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleAries July 2022 Horoscope
Life is moving forward, and you are journeying through new experiences this month, Aries. July is a time of awakening for you, and a space where you are moving through an energetic shift in your life. Things are changing, but it’s nothing your free spirit can’t fully take advantage of. This is the month to expand your worldview and to see where new perspectives will take you. Everything comes together when you can trust yourself and the doors that are opening for you now.
Chiron and Jupiter are currently transiting through your sign, and they both go retrograde this month. On July 19, Chiron, the wounded healer, will enter retrograde in Aries until December 23, and Jupiter in Aries will go retrograde on July 28 until November 23. You are in the process of completing one cycle and manifesting another. You are in a major cleanse this month and are making space for happiness to continue to grow.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTaurus July 2022 Horoscope
July is a month of release, and recovery for you, Taurus. You are seeing some goals and achievements come to fruition right now, and you are also moving through a space of healing from the past and what it’s taken to get you here. Your guidance for the month is to give yourself kindness and safety as you move through this growth process in your life and to believe in the intentions you are seeding right now.
With Mars entering Taurus at the start of the month from July 5 until August 20, you have passion and stamina on your side right now. The energy is with you to see some important goals through, and with Mars in your sign over the next month, you have the inspiration and motivation to do so. July is your month of releasing yourself from the past, gaining a new vision, and reclaiming your power, and success.
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGemini July 2022 Horoscope
July is all about gaining insight and getting the answers you have been looking for, Gemini. There is incredible wisdom and insight to grab ahold of this month, and the clarity is flowing in your life. You are being guided to speak up for what you believe in, and to show up for your unique ideas and perspectives. Pallas enters Gemini from July 4 until September 6, further enhancing the coming together and inner clarity you are experiencing this month.
Your ruling planet Mercury will be moving through your 2nd house of finances until July 19, and your mind is flowing where the money is going. This is a good month to get organized, go over your finances, and plan for the future. The New Moon in Leo on the 28th before the month ends is your time of receiving important messages and following the signs. The clarity that is coming into your life in July is game-changing, Gemini.
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCancer July 2022 Horoscope
This month is all about allowing. Cancer, July is your season, and this Cancer Season is all about opening up to receive the beautiful blessings that are flowing towards you this month. You are an intuitive Moonchild, and this month you are connecting to this sensitive strength of yours. Remember the gift of your existence, and allow others to recognize and appreciate you this month, Cancer.
Mercury enters your sign on July 5 until July 19, and Venus enters Cancer on July 17 until August 11, making July a time where you are gaining mental clarity, having important conversations, moving around, and also a month where you are feeling the love. With the Full Moon happening mid-month also occurring in your 7th house of love and relationships, the universe has one mission for you this month Cancer: for you to know how loved you are and to feel that within.
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLeo July 2022 Horoscope
July is all about opening the heart, Leo. You are rising above previous doubts and concerns, and claiming your power in all situations. This is the month to believe in your dreams and to believe in the gifts of love. There have been challenges you have had to move through this year, a lot of them unexpected, but that doesn’t mean you will have to continue to live on a rollercoaster when there is solid ground for you to walk on right now.
July is a powerful month for you overall, with Leo Season beginning this month. This year Mercury will be entering Leo from July 19 until August 4, Leo Season begins on July 22, and there is New Moon in Leo on July 28. July is a month of recognizing the opportunities and peace that comes from letting go of restrictions and allowing yourself to be loved and blessed by the divine, Leo.
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVirgo July 2022 Horoscope
This is a month of rejuvenation and bringing things into divine order, Virgo. Positive resolutions and outcomes are happening for you in July, and this is the month to believe in a miracle. Don’t dismiss the possibilities of something really good happening this month, and keep your eyes open for a helping hand. You deserve more time and space to just be. This month is about learning the truth and beauty of doing less and gaining more.
Friendships, community, your network, and where you see yourself going from here are all key themes for you in July. This is a month of forming new connections and strengthening ones that have remained unmoved through the transitions of this year. You are recharging your spirit this month and with a Full Moon in a fellow earth sign, Capricorn, happening in your 5th house of romance this month, July is sure to be full of pleasant surprises.
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLibra July 2022 Horoscope
Trust the process, Libra. July is all about remaining in your peace and finding your balance through what is becoming. You are thinking a lot about your career goals, achievements, and responsibilities in the home space. Finding the balance between all the things you want to do and be can be difficult at times, and this month is about giving yourself the time to figure out what works for you and your divine flow right now.
The Full Moon this month is occurring in your 4th house of home and family, and this is a good time of the month to declutter, cleanse the home, rest, and regain your center. A few days later, your ruling planet Venus moves into your 10th house of career, and you are evolving into some new spheres of success this month. Before July ends, there is a New Moon in your house of friendships, and you are feeling a new sense of support in life moving into August.
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleScorpio July 2022 Horoscope
July is about recalling your power, Scorpio. You have the divine insight to move through previous challenges and obstacles, and paths are clearing for you this month. There is a deep understanding that is coming into your world in July, and what is coming full circle for you now is everything needed to feel protected and grounded moving forward. This month is about allowing yourself to live by your standards and your truths, and doing so confidently.
The Full Moon on the 13th of this month is moving through your house of the mind, and with this being a Full Moon, you are seeing with clear eyes. The clarity is there, and Venus moving into your 9th house of spirituality and adventure a few days later, is birthing new ideas and opportunities into your life. Before July ends Jupiter goes retrograde in your 6th house, and you are focused on your personal healing and empowerment as the month ends.
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSagittarius July 2022 Horoscope
July is a month of a river of blessings flowing into your life, Sagittarius. You have set yourself up for success and this is the month of experiencing more of those treasured moments. Powerful blessings and manifestations are appearing for you now, and the universe is giving you a big YES to proceed forward. You have listened to your intuition and lived by your personal truths, and have moved into some fortunate circumstances.
The Leo New Moon on the 28th is a passionate affair that you can get on board with, and this New Moon is fueling your sense of adventure and excitement. By the end of the month, you are setting your intentions for the future, and dreaming up the most divine vacations your soul can think of. Your ruling planet Jupiter goes retrograde on the same day until November, and you are being reminded as well, of the importance of following your bliss balanced with logic.
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCapricorn July 2022 Horoscope
July is a month of rising above and coming together in love, Capricorn. Soulmate connections are moving into your life this month, and you are connecting with the gifts of clarity of the heart. You have found an inner peace that is both strengthening and also vulnerable, and it’s attracting new experiences for you in love. This is the month to let go of what was, and live in the beauty of what is here today.
Mid-July there is a Full Moon in your sign on July 13. This Full Moon is a time of personal revelation for you, and also a time where you are closing a major chapter in your life. Take as much time as you need with your healing and growth, and trust that where you are going from here is so much better than where you have been. Venus enters your house of love a few days later, and it’s about showing up for divine partnerships right now.
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAquarius July 2022 Horoscope
July is a dynamic month for you, Aquarius. Some deep transformations are taking place this month, and you are living in your wisdom, empowerment, and passion. You are being reminded this month that you are divinely protected with every step you take in life and that you can create some major breakthroughs in your life with the power of belief. July is about being fearless in your pursuits, and about allowing your truth and wisdom to shine.
The Full Moon happening mid-month is occurring in your 12th house of endings, dreams, and the subconscious, and you are ready to let go of what hasn’t served right now. You are releasing old patterns and limitations, and allowing your blessings to unfold. By the end of the month, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign of Leo, and this New Moon is a time of new developments in love. July is all about taking your time and going at your own pace while light unfolds.
PiscesLaci Jordan for xoNecolePisces July 2022 Horoscope
July is all about the universe fueling your world with divine support, love, and compassion. This month is a time of nurturing yourself and what you are bringing to fruition right now, Pisces. There is support with you as you take some time to sort through what is and figure out where your heart stands now. July is all about releasing yourself from any attachments to outcomes and allowing the path of least resistance.
With one of your ruling planets, Jupiter, going retrograde on the same day as the Leo New Moon this month on July 28, you are finding the balance between what you need to allow some more time to unfold, and what you are moving forward with now. It’s about giving yourself the grace to move through this time and about speaking up for yourself and what you need as well. Remember how supported you are, Pisces.
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It took me a while to realize that the biggest thing I was doing "wrong" was not recognizing the power I had in choosing the people I let into my life. Blaming myself for the people I was "attracting" was pointless because I had no power or control over who was attracted to me. None of us do.
Instead of asking ourselves, "Why do I keep attracting this type of person?" we should try asking, "Why do I continue to give energy to people who show signs of not being a good fit for me?"
To have healthier and more fulfilling relationships, we must be intentional about who we entertain and make space for in our lives. We have to own our decision to continue patterns with people because they provide us with a familiar discomfort we’ve become accustomed to settling for. While we aren't responsible for the way people treat us, we are responsible for understanding why we decide to stay.
So, how do we lay the foundation for choosing the right people?
1. Show up as yourself.
When we first meet someone, it's tempting to show up as our representative or be the person we think someone is looking for. To find people we're compatible with, we must be brave enough to be ourselves, even if that means not being liked or accepted. As long as we find the courage to radically love, value, and accept ourselves, we put ourselves in the position to meet people with whom we can sustain healthy and meaningful relationships.
2. Build a relationship with yourself.
Being disconnected from ourselves can make it hard to be connected with other people. Learning to love, honor, and respect ourselves helps us create a strong foundation for building healthy relationships with other people. When we feel safe with ourselves, we'll feel more confident when putting ourselves out there to get to know others. When we begin having conflicts, which is guaranteed to happen whenever people get to know each other, we'll be able to communicate our needs and boundaries to increase intimacy in the relationship. If the relationship doesn't work out, we're less likely to blame ourselves and more likely to trust that we can make more fulfilling connections in the future.
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3. Don't be afraid to look "needy."
Sometimes we're afraid to ask for what we need to feel safe or comfortable in a relationship because we fear looking "needy." When we present as "needless," we end up in a community with people that like being around us because we don't ask for anything. As a result, the relationships become one-sided as they grow more comfortable and content with not doing anything for us. As the relationship progresses, we attempt to let our needs be known and grow resentful as our requests go unnoticed. Being open about our needs helps us discover people we're compatible with in friendship and romance. Having needs is one of the things that makes us human, and some of these needs can only be filled when we're in relationships with other people. Remember, sometimes you're not asking for too much; you're simply asking the wrong person.
4. Let people unfold.
Sometimes we commit to people too quickly. We become captivated with the idea of someone, and when the truth of that person is revealed, we are disappointed, or worse, we're in denial. Natalie Lou, the author of the Baggage Reclaim Series, always reminds readers that "people unfold." Over the course of getting to know someone, we may discover signs that unveil incompatibility. If we're not careful, we'll overlook those signs and keep moving forward because we don't want to be wrong about someone.
We don't want to be alone again. We don't want to stop being friends with someone. But, in the end, we hurt our own feelings by choosing to deny the reality of our situation. We also draw out the ending of what would likely be an unfulfilling relationship. The more time we spend engaging with people we aren't compatible with, the less time we spend connecting with people we fit well with.
5. Choose people that choose you.
Stop chasing after people who are running away from you. Some of us learned that we were difficult to love, and we internalized that our relationships would be challenging and filled with uneasiness. When we receive mixed signals, crumbs of attention, or poor treatment, we're prepared to fight and perform to sustain the relationship and prove ourselves. Our nervous system gets triggered, and we mistake those feelings of uncertainty for attraction and love. But that's not love, and we are worthy and deserving of so much more.
We deserve mutuality. We deserve to be around people who want to be with us as much as we want to be with them. We shouldn't be in a state of constantly questioning if someone is as invested as we are, nor should we be performing for love. Choose people that choose you—no forcing, no begging.
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6. Become comfortable with impermanence.
Everyone you meet and build a relationship with won't stay in your life forever, and that's okay. Everyone isn't meant to stay. Sometimes we try to prevent people from leaving or refuse to walk away because we're uncomfortable with endings. More importantly, we're uncomfortable with what endings say about us. By trying to control whether or not people stay, we're attempting to control the uncontrollable. It's a losing game, and we end up hurting ourselves and others in the process. Longevity in a relationship is not an indicator of health or fulfillment, nor does it serve as a reflection of our worthiness.
7. Stop making excuses for people.
When we feel unlovable, we can have a strong desire to stop other people from feeling the same way. We'll try to accommodate, justify and tolerate unacceptable behavior in other people because we don't want to be mean or reject people. We aren't responsible for protecting other people from rejection or disappointment. If we're being honest, sometimes we struggle with the idea of rejecting someone because we don't want to deal with the pain of being rejected and assume others can't handle it either. When people hurt us, we lean into being too understanding instead of assessing the relationship and establishing boundaries. Don't fall into the trap of blaming yourself for someone else's behavior in hopes that if you take responsibility, you can evoke change. Part of being in healthy relationships and establishing respect is showing others you have the strength and courage to protect yourself.
Taking responsibility for our lives is scary, but it's where healing begins. While we can't be in control of everything, we can exercise our power to choose. Letting people into our lives isn't a passive activity. The relationships we choose to pour energy into play a significant role in our happiness and well-being. Give yourself the love, compassion, and foundation you need to choose wisely.
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