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Tracee Ellis Ross
Tracee Ellis Ross
Tracee Ellis Ross Doesn’t Want You To Look At Her As The ‘Poster Child For Being Single'
29 October
Tracee Ellis Ross is living her best life at 49-years-old, single and all! Over the course of her career, the Black-ish star has been admired for her talent, sense of humor and her bangin' bawdy so many fans have questioned, why is she still single? Why hasn't she had kids yet? But according to Tracee, she doesn't live her life for others, therefore our questions don't matter to her.
However, the Girlfriends star did speak about her single status and living life on her own terms. In an interview with Harper's BAZAAR, Tracee dove into how men have long been behind what happiness is supposed to look like for a woman.
"I didn't see enough examples of different versions of how a woman can find happiness and joy and power and sensuality, sexuality, all of that, without it being through the lens of how I'm seen by a man. People are like, 'You're the poster child for being single.' And I was like, 'Great.' But what I would prefer is that I'm the poster child for living my life on my terms. And that there's a version of that for everyone."
"I don't live my life for other people," she continued. "I just totally live it for me. This is something that has really solidified itself into an unbreakable, unshakable foundation in the last four or five years."
Period, Ms. Ross!
This isn't the first time the former model had to address being single and childless. In a May Marie Claire interview , Tracee discussed the pressures put on women to have a family and live a traditional life.
"Our society spoon-feeds it to you," she said. "I used to put myself to sleep dreaming of my wedding. And I would still love all of that, but what am I going to do, just sit around waiting? Shut up. I've got so many things to do."
But Tracee isn't alone. There are many other successful Black women who aren't letting being single and childless over 40 define them.
Celebrities like Sanaa Lathan and Regina Hall have also spoken out about society's obsession for women, particularly Black women, getting married and settling down with kids and a white picket fence.
During 2020 CultureCon, Sanaa gave her opinion on the romanticized view of marriage and kids that women grew up seeing in TV and films.
"We read all these fairy tales---Snow White, Cinderella--...[and] they're being chosen by a man. That's when you win when you are chosen by a man. That's not the truth!" she said.
"I'mma choose me first."
Featured image by Rich Fury/Getty Images
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OK, so I don't know about you, but Tracee Ellis Ross keeps me on my toes. Anytime I need fashion, gym, or beauty motivation, I know she is who I can run to to keep me together, an energy she has kept her entire career. She's relatable, although she is absolutely not relatable (because her entire life is a flex), but she still reigns supreme as the mascot of Black women.
Loud and proud.
In honor of her main character energy ways, here are 8 times Tracee Ellis Ross radiated being the main character of one's life.
The time she shined a light on Black designers when hosting the AMA's:
Tracee Ellis Ross is nottttt shy about crediting Black designers, which she wore on the big stage of the American Music Awards. She hosted the show and shared more information on her looks on Instagram via a screenshot of her Notes app.
"Not every piece I wore was by a Black designer, but I wore a Black designer in every look and Pat McGrath on my face."
She says it was a story she wanted to tell through her clothing, and her stylist, Karla Welch, made it happen.
"I was inspired by Issa Rae and Jason Rembert, who did it first at the CFDA Awards in June. I strongly believe in using my platform to shine light in directions I believe in, love, and celebrate my people."
When she actually was a main character in one of the best sitcoms in television history. TWICE:
Tracee may currently be known for her role as Rainbow Johnson on ABC's Blackish, but it was Joan Clayton on Girlfriends that placed her as cultural royalty. It began airing September 2000, and ran for eight seasons (including two on successor CW). In fact, the show was so legendary, it spawned another classic, spinoff, The Game.
"We were dealing with a lot of very real topics. We dealt with HIV, chlamydia, sexually transmitted disease, pregnancy, colourism, classism… all of these kinds of dynamics that come up as Black women, we were really diving in on 20 years ago, and I just feel so proud of the work we did, particularly because of how relevant it still feels."
When she strolled through Paris, stopped traffic, and made the girls stare:
Tracee looked mesmerizing as she wandered around in a beautiful flowing sheer dress that featured a ruched front, and an elaborate train that looked blew in the wind for the gawds. She looked stunning as people stopped and stared, and the internet went crazy as we all declared that Tracee is now the new owner of the color pink. #fightme
Or the time she existed in a world where her mother was THE Diana Ross:
Although her real name is Tracee Joy Silberstein, she is very much so a 'Ross.' And she is ever-so inspired by her mother Diana Ross in every single way. During a recent appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live Thursday, she told guest host Sean Hayes that she gets a kick out of recreating throwback photos of her musical legend mama.
"I had this necklace, of hers and I think it was a necklace attached to a jumpsuit she wore in Mahogany, and I have always said, every time I see the picture, I'm like 'Oh my god I have that necklace!' I steal stuff from her. I kind of love doing it."
When she won the 'Fashion Icon Award' at the People's Choice Awards:
Tracee Ellis Ross has been in the spotlight her entire life, and last year she was honored for her always-impeccable style. The actress took home the style icon award at the 2020 People's Choice Awards. Ross told E!:
"As I was coming out of the womb, I was like 'Sparkles! Where's the feathers! Give 'em to me, fashion, I love fashion! It started very young. I come by it honestly, my mom is Diana Ross, she's the fashion icon that I actually follow. My father also has impeccable taste."
She also credits her fashion sense to her mom and her 'epic closet.'
When she showed off her unapologetic joy just because:
I mean, if there were ever a photo definition of a flex, I'm sure this one ranks somewhere up there.
When she decided to be more of a boss and create a natural haircare line:
Tracee Ellis Ross' efforts to highlight diversity, equity and inclusion certainly do not stop in Hollywood. In 2019, after years of being asked for her hair secrets, Ross launched her line of natural hair products, Pattern Beauty, ultimately to fill a void she had personally witnessed in beauty and culture. In fact, she spent 10 whole years fine-tuning her vision to embrace the "authentic" beauty of Black hair.
"My journey in hair care started with my own personal journey. The mission of the brand is to meet the needs of the curly, coily and tight texture community."
To date, Pattern has a partnership with numerous large retailers, and even landed Tracee a role as Ulta's newest high-profile diversity and inclusion adviser.
When she wore feathered Bottega around the house, because you know, it's Tuesday:
Here's Tracee, ladies and gentlemen, causally sitting on the floor of her home in a Bottega Veneta pre-fall collection, feathered pantsuit.
And finally, when she set the bar for solo travel, all while breaking the internet:
Ross holds nothing back in establishing her regal main character status on Instagram. And her solo vacations are legendary, as every year, she gives us our travel goals, and shows us how to do it right. She has said:
"I think that was a big growth opportunity for me as I was coming of age and learning how to be on my own. I'm very comfortable traveling alone and being my own best friend."
Now all we need, are her lessons on how to break the internet too.
Are you a member of our insiders squad? Join us in the xoTribe Members Community today!
Featured image by Karwai Tang/Getty Images
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Let's be real, at one time or another, all of us have struggled with how we view our bodies and positive self-image. Even the most confident and self-assured of us can find ourselves nitpicking and critiquing the stretch marks we see here or the extra bloat that we might see there. Despite the fact that we might be quick to offer the next person a compliment when they say something self-deprecating about their bodies, sometimes we forget to give ourselves that same grace.
And with it being summertime, and the streets calling us outside to partake in hot girl summer activities, it's easy to feel that self-doubt and insecurity stopping us from loving the bodies we have while we focus on the bodies we hope to attain. Don't get us wrong, having fitness inspo and "beach-body" goals to aspire to are cool, but so are the bodies we get to call our homes.
What's beautiful about this season in particular is how much self-love in the form of body acceptance has been emphasized. Adding their voices to that movement are celebs like Tracee Ellis Ross and Ashley Graham who are using their platforms to echo sentiments about showing your body gratitude instead of criticism.
Keep scrolling for some celebrities daring to bare the skin they're in and their bodies as they are now, fully and unapologetically.
Ashley Graham says "it's hot out there and so are you."
Recently, model and host Ashley Graham shared a slideshow of powerful images showing the range of very real shapes and sizes. In her caption, she wrote, "I hope these photos I've been tagged in of so many beautiful bodies motivates you to love the skin you're in. believe me when I say your body is beautiful, and i know it's easy to tell yourself the lie that you're not good enough, thin enough, sexy enough, 'flawless' enough to wear a tank top or a swimsuit, but it's hot out there and so are you."
In an interview with Porter earlier this year, Ashley revealed why it was that she is intentional about sharing photos of herself on Instagram showing her body. Hint: it ain't about the likes.
"I don't post myself half-naked to get the likes. I post myself half-naked so that someone who's 10 years younger than me knows that that side butt, that hip dip — that's not abnormal to have."
"I wish that, when I was younger, there had been someone as outspoken as I was, who was as fearless with their cellulite and back fat, so I could know that this was normal; this was what a body looks like."
Rihanna knows she is beautiful regardless of her weight.
Rihanna is a purveyor of slay at any size and she has worn confidence as a second skin for her entire career, both onstage as a performer and off as the Queen of Savage. For our favorite bad gal, self-acceptance is key. Sis told VOGUE she is a firm believer in embracing her body at any phase:
"You've just got to laugh at yourself, honestly. I mean, I know when I'm having a fat day and when I've lost weight. I accept all of the bodies. I'm not built like a Victoria's Secret girl, and I still feel very beautiful and confident in my lingerie."
Tracee Ellis Ross wants you to show your body compassion.
Earlier this year, Tracee Ellis Ross shared an affirming message via her IGTV in April with the title "Checking In 4/8". In it, she addressed the fact that our bodies need compassion not judgment. For her, gratitude is the attitude and it's a gift she'd like to pay forward.
"I really encourage and invite all of us to just receive the wisdom of our bodies right now and allow the softness, the weight--whatever that looks like and be grateful. Like, I feel like I've made it through this year. And in some ways I've gotten deeper. In some ways I've gotten bigger in some ways. I am forever changed in some ways... I don't think that my physical body is the most important thing to come out of this very difficult time... I think it is--this is a time for us to offer compassion everywhere to our bodies and to each other."
Danielle Brooks says your body is your ride or die.
Similarly to Tracee, actress Danielle Brooks took to Instagram to emphasize the important role our bodies play in our lives. She proceeded to thank her temple accordingly:
"Why I am grateful for MY BODY: The body is your ride or die, literally. So I'm thankful for Good Health!! I'm thankful that my body functions at [100] regardless of the imperfections the world might see. It holds me up. It sustains me through long work weeks. It takes me on trips around the world, and carries me through my most stressful days and my most exciting. My body has my back, because it knows that I am learning to listen to what it needs to have it function at its best. I don't take my body for granted, so thank you body for taking me on an incredible ride this year!"
Alicia Keys thinks your body is a miracle.
Alicia Keys spoke to ELLE to share her beauty and wellness tips with the publication. When the subject of her body came up, the songstress recalled being insecure about the change affiliated with having children. She said:
"When I had kids, I felt like, 'Oh, my gosh, I'll never look the same ever again.' And that creates insecurity. It fluctuates and flows, but I feel like today, right now, I feel really good about my body. Every day, what your body does is a miracle. We're like the walking embodiments of miracles, and I like to remember that."
SZA believes the standard should come from within.
In a 2018 panel discussion with Girl Collective, SZA explained her journey to achieving positive self-image and learning to accept your self for yourself:
"It's all about where it starts in your mind. I think there are a lot of standards that people told me about that I didn't see. I started, I was 190 pounds, I only wore my dad's big t-shirts and socks on stage, no shoes, and didn't even notice; never complained or tripped about my makeup."
"It was just a matter of where I was in my mind, but I did also come out of that space where I was like, I feel like I want to change. I want to be different. I want to grow. I want to learn. I think it's one thing to be comfortable, but then it's one thing to not see your full potential and your full picture. The standard should really come [from] within."
Lizzo wants you to radically love on yourself today and every day.
A list about celebs embracing positive body self-image would not be complete without including "Juice" artist Lizzo. Though Lizzo is transparent that some days, loving herself and her body isn't always easy, self-love and self-acceptance is something she puts work into daily. Just like the rest of us:
"I started talking to my belly this year. Blowing her kisses and showering her with praises. I used to want to cut my stomach off I hated it so much. But it's literally ME. I am learning to radically love every part of myself. Even if it means talking to myself every morning. This is your sign to love on yourself today!"
Featured image by Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
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If there one thing in this world that you can be sure of, it's that we love us some Tracee Ellis Ross. She is the big sister we all wish we had, who is on a quest to live her best life, and absolutely nothing else. Not only that, she shows us that we can all do the same, by stripping ourselves of society's ideals and just...be.
And her relatable way of doing so is why we continue to come back for more.Â
But this time, her message of marriage is what she's set her sights on, telling us all, that yeah, marriage may be nice, but waiting around on it is not the move. In an interview with Marie Claire, when asked for the hundredth time if she ever longed for a "traditional" life with the husband and picket fence, she answered in the most Tracee way:
"Well, how could you not? Our society spoon-feeds it to you. I used to put myself to sleep dreaming of my wedding. And I would still love all of that, but what am I going to do, just sit around waiting? Shut up. I've got so many things to do."
Shut. Up. I've. Got. So. Many. Things. To. Do.
And historically, she has expressed the same to others who've asked, as she's told anyone who will listen that we must normalize loving ourselves, first, openly, and unapologetically. And the way she says so, is always the content we deserve in our lives.
Additionally, she also touches on other brave subjects from Black-ish, to the type of mom her mother was, to the characters she'd most love to play. Continue reading for all the Tracee goodness!
On Playing Lucille Ball One Day:
After the interviewer suggests she should play Lucille Ball in an upcoming biopic due to their animated conversation, she shoots back:
"Do you know how many people would be upset if a Black woman played Lucille Ball?! But I want to so badly. Do you know who else I wanted to play? I wanted to play Miss Hannigan in Annie. Oh my God. It was my dream! My mom used to let me stay up late to watch Carol Burnett. And, no, none of these women are Black or looked like me, but I saw myself in them."
On Adjusting To Being A CEO:
"I've been in a growth curve around CEO stuff. And then I've got to get up at 5 a.m. and go to work [as an actress] and be pretty. Wooo, I want to go to bed. Oh my God, I just want to wear my glasses for the day.
But don't expect her to be a diva in the role:
"As a CEO, it's a lot of this [points to her temple] but I have to remind myself to stay connected to my heart and my gut. I don't know many people who thrive when they're yelled at. I shop the most when I feel good. I'm not sure why we have a marketing system that is based on shaming people. I don't get it. When I feel small, I don't want to do shit."
On Becoming Ulta's Diversity and Inclusion Advisor:
"I want the world to be a better place. And I want Black people to feel really good walking into a retail space."
On the Pandemic Stifling Her Fashion Creativity:
"I don't miss the frenzy of the red carpet. I don't miss the panic of the red carpet. But I miss beautiful clothes. I miss that form of creative expression for me. I miss glamour."
On Learning to Love Her Hair:Â
"Caring for myself is not self-indulgence; it is self-preservation and is an act of political warfare. Learning to love my hair in a world that doesn't mirror that celebration has been a form of both resistance and the claiming of my identity, my self-hood, my legacy, my ancestral lines, the history that I come from."
Wow, this woman. Read the full interview here.
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Featured image by Stefanie Keenan/Getty Images
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Tracee Ellis Ross
Tracee Ellis Ross Just Took The 'Out Of Office' Epic Solo Vacation That We All Need This Summer
10 May
As we know, if anyone is the queen of solo travel, it's Tracee Ellis Ross. Year after year, she takes her banging body poolside, or to somebody's island, in an effort to show us how this shit is really done.
She has perfected the 'solo selfie', and is a master at teaching the art of self-love, and working hard, but absolutely playing much frickin' harder.
And this vacay was no different as our good sis packed up her bags and headed where the beaming sun resides.
She didn't say much, just enjoyed, and captured glimpses of her getaway. She laughed. She danced. She rested. She slayed. She was boundless in her "me time", a lesson we all needed as we gear up for a panorama-less summer, or at least a new normal. But most of all, she was unapologetic in why she was there, with simple captions, mainly one that kicked off the trip:
"Consider this my out of office reply!"
And listen, it's no secret that Ross is happily single and not waiting for anyone--a man OR friends--to catch these flights. She's living openly, on her own terms, and living her best life doing so. She tells Brit + Co:
"I think that was a big growth opportunity for me as I was coming of age and learning how to be on my own. I'm very comfortable traveling alone and being my own best friend."
Which she wants you to learn to be as well. And if you aren't sure how to do so, she has a bit of advice: baby steps.
"I would experiment going to a restaurant at 8pm on your own on a Saturday night to see how it feels. You start to get a sense of what it is that you're comfortable with."
What better way to jumpstart the summer than to revist some of our favorite Tracee vacays?
Keep scrolling for your reminder that this year is THE year to take that solo trip, boo!
Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
And bonus! Here's a clip of Tracee discussing her vacations below:
Oh, Tracee. How we love you so. How we don't deserve you authenticity, but we welcome it. We're not worthy but we thank you!
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Featured image by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images for Marc Jacobs
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Tracee Ellis Ross
Tracee Ellis Ross Talks Giving Our Bodies Compassion & We Should All Lean Into Her Message
11 April
Our obsession with picture-perfect bodies ages over decades. Truth be told: we have always equated self-worth with size. As for me and my house, I have never felt comfortable in my body and as the lockdown went on and on, I found myself longing for the body I had in years past. Even then, I thought I was fat. I realized in those moments that my lifetime relationship with my body was toxic.
Not to mention, all the memes in 2020 about quarantine weight. From the quarantine 15 to eating your month's worth of favorite snacks in one day, the innanets had us all feeling guilty for living and adapting to our new normal. As much as we wanted our unusual standards to disappear once 2021 arrived, that's not what transpired. It high key feels like we are basically in an extended version of 2020 with all that is happening in the world.
Our favorite auntie and all-around icon, Tracee Ellis Ross, reminded us of this when she recently posted a video recounting all that we have endured since the beginning of the lockdown. More importantly, she discusses her own struggles with her body and how she had to adjust her expectations while extending grace.
"I don't know about you guys, but after the insanity of the year that we have been through, over a year now that is, you know, it's still creeping along, I didn't like transform my body, exercise like a crazy woman and turn into a vegan. And, and as a result, you know, my body feels different.
"I sat more than I'm used to. I didn't do the same amount of cardio. I wasn't in the gym because of the circumstances of what we were all living in and are all living in. There was like this funnel that was like funneling joy into very small spaces."
The Black-ish star continues to say that joy is a major part of well-being and humanity. It's what makes us feel good. It sparks spontaneity and connection and those beautiful feelings were instantly funneled into our little individual spaces. We totally agreed with Tracee when she professed that most of the things that were in that little funnel were food and drinks because it brought us solace and comfort. The moment she started judging herself for making certain choices, she started asking, "What am I doing?" Which reminded her of a friend who had a contentious relationship with her body after having her first child and decided to write her body a "thank you" note.
"I realized that the softness that I'm experiencing in my body, a little bit of extra weight--all of us have our own version of that--is actually something to say, thank you for that. The softness that my body has been incredibly wise--that thank you for keeping me safe during COVID or if I was a body that got COVID keeping me healthy through and fighting through a virus--that with all the sharpness and harshness and violence and fear that has been around that perhaps the softness of my body is a blessing that it has been able to nurture me in a way that my mind could not...
"I really encourage and invite all of us to just receive the wisdom of our bodies right now and allow the softness, the weight--whatever that looks like and be grateful. Like, I feel like I've made it through this year. And in some ways I've gotten deeper. In some ways I've gotten bigger in some ways. I am forever changed in some ways... I don't think that my physical body is the most important thing to come out of this very difficult time... I think it is--this is a time for us to offer compassion everywhere to our bodies and to each other."
What a powerful, healthy way to reconnect with our bodies. I remember when I started therapy, one of the topics I was the most uncomfortable broaching was my relationship with my body. My therapist told me that one way to reconnect with parts of me that I don't love is by talking to those very parts. Y'all know I looked at her like she was crazy, right? What do I look like caressing my belly and talking to it? It's safe to say I told my therapist I would think about it.
Two days later, I was scrolling on Instagram and saw Lizzo caressing and talking to her belly.
She said in her caption:
"I started talking to my belly this year. Blowing her kisses and showering her with praises. I used to want to cut my stomach off, I hated it so much. But it's literally ME. I am learning to radically love every part of myself. Even if it means talking to myself every morning."
Both women serve as powerful reminders to love yourself, your whole self. But especially the parts of us that our hardest to love.
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Featured image via Tracee Ellis Ross/Instagram
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