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At the top of most people's list of goals is normally the usual culprit: I want to be more productive and focused. I want to get more stuff done this year. So many of my girlfriends usually send themselves into a "life hack frenzy" – Googling every productivity solution known to mankind. This usually starts with a week of "results" and ends with a forgotten goal and a return to old habits. What if the key to maximizing productivity was rethinking our approach? While so many of us think we can hack our way to optimizing our output, we oftentimes forget about the bigger picture.

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The relationship we have and nurture with self lays the foundation for how we relate to and connect with others in our lives. Assessing the issues that discourage self-love from prospering are key in order to repair and reignite the freedom that comes when we finally believe the words "you are enough." I chatted with self-love advocate and lifestyle entrepreneur Shelah Marie – who you may remember from when her 2017 photo of doing yoga with boyfriend, rapper Ace Hood, went viral. Shelah's mission is to create a movement of total self-love and liberation for women of color through her platform Curvy, Curly, Conscious – a place where "self-help" meets "real talk" through virtual and offline events and retreats.

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