When I asked Jasmine Lawrence to describe herself in one word, she paused to think, but a few short seconds later she said, without a flinch, "Amazing."
Up until that point, I'd been trying to find the words to describe how this fiercely confident Black woman was able to accomplish so much by the age of 28. She launched her first company EDEN BodyWorks at just thirteen after experiencing a personal hair loss crisis and then attending NFTE BizCamp, a student entrepreneurship program, where she was equipped with the tools that would help her find a way to create and sell a product that solved a hair problem she knew many like her needed. EDEN is now celebrating its 15th anniversary, with a repertoire of accomplishments, retail partners like Target, CVS, and Sally Beauty Supply, a loyal beauty community, and global experiences supporting the journey.
But, more interestingly, Jasmine is not only a beauty entrepreneur. After graduating from Georgia Institute of Technology with a degree in Computer Science, she's gone on to build a thriving career in tech at powerhouse companies like Microsoft and most currently, Facebook.
To top it off, she's not looking to quit either anytime soon.
What's the road to amazing look like? How has Jasmine been able to boldly and unapologetically float between two worlds - without sacrificing who she is and how her natural passion for solution-seeking shows up in the world? For Jasmine, this is important because she doesn't "always want to be the first or the only person that are doing things that are impressive." The word "amazing" comes with the desire to show other women that look like her that they, too, can do great things.
xoNecole spoke to Jasmine about her road to flourishing in two careers, the powers of being entrepreneurially fluid, when being multi passionate can be advantageous in the workplace, why more Black women should consider STEM careers, and whether "having it all" is ever really possible.
Responses have been edited for length and clarity.
What has contributed the most to your business success?
Consistency. It doesn't mean you never change. It means you have a foundational understanding of who you are. At EDEN, we know our vision, mission, what we want to be known for, and what kind of impact we want to have in people's lives. That remains consistent no matter who is on my team. If you don't align with our mission and values, this isn't the brand you want to be part of.
It was also about choosing wisely what we were going to invest our time in. You can get quickly burned out emotionally or financially [by] going to every single hair/trade show and accepting every distribution deal for every mom and pop shop and everyone who wants to carry your products. It's very draining. Strategic growth and saying no to the opportunities that are not going to give you the return on investment that you really need with your limited time and other resources is important.
Courtesy of Jasmine Lawrence
"Strategic growth and saying no to the opportunities that are not going to give you the return on investment that you really need with your limited time and other resources is important."
How did you manage going to college and running a beauty company?
The work that I do with EDEN and the work I do in tech are very similar. They require the same set of strengths. I wanted to be an engineer before I lost my hair. I always wanted to be a builder, creator, and inventor of things and solve people's problems. When I lost my own hair and needed something for myself, I used my knowledge of science and the scientific method to create different formulas. All of those things I learned from my passion for science and creating things.
I knew college was going to be a challenge. I took preventative measures before officially moving to Atlanta. Building the team that I have today was part of that exercise. We took a time out for a year in the late 2000s to reassess who was going to be on our board and who's going to be on our team and run day-to-day operations. We had to automate some things that we were previously doing manually. I find a way to have the best of both worlds and make sacrifices I'm comfortable with.
In our world, we’re told you can’t have it all. Your story shows that it is possible to have your foot in different industries. How do you do it?
Having a computer degree helped me understand how stuff is being built and my role in making sure that it's built ethically and that it is accessible. It opened my mind to an entire career path that is sometimes intimidating and challenging. I love to be that bridge between people and tech. Even in the Black community or women's community - I like to let [people] know this is something you can strive towards. I'm not some crazy unicorn that just has a genius mind. It's something I've worked hard for and sought to understand and have been able to make an impact by pursuing although it may be nontraditional for someone with my background.
I'm super hesitant to say we can have it all. It gives an unrealistic expectation that you are going to be 100% fulfilled in every area that you invest your time in. It's not an accurate description. It wanes and waxes. You're in seasons of pouring more and more into your business, job, self, or family - it takes a while for you to settle into a balance that makes sense. It's hard to want more than one thing.
There's a conscious focus on "Does this matter to me? Is this worth my time?" You can have a lot - but it will be to varying degrees of satisfaction and investment based on what works for you personally. If you like doing your full-time job every day, it's okay. It's okay to not have a side hustle. If you're drawn in a different direction, you should pursue it.
Courtesy of Jasmine Lawrence
"I like to let [people] know this is something you can strive towards. I'm not some crazy unicorn that just has a genius mind. It's something I've worked hard for and sought to understand and have been able to make an impact by pursuing although it may be nontraditional for someone with my background."
What key roles do you outsource?
Operational leadership. My Vice President drives day-to-day and leads our team. That is the core role. We are two opposite heartbeats. We have to stay in sync and connected. Public relations and design are the other two roles where I am so busy doing the work, it's hard for me to tell the story of what's happening as well. Having a great PR team or point person who can find the right opportunities and have the brand show up in ways that make sense for us and create innovative things that align with the brand identity is crucial. With design, it is incredible [to have] someone who can maintain continuity between your brand identity but also challenge you to grow and modernize.
What’s it like working in tech as an employee but also being a CEO?
The main challenges I've had are when my coworkers find out and there's that sense of envy. Or, they'll ask me rude questions like, "Why are you even here? Why would you show up every day when you're doing this and that with your own company? Why would you be a slave to the man when you have the freedom to be your own boss?" Or, they think if I do slip up on something or something is late that I'm distracted by this other thing I have going on.
On the light side, they like to brag on me as much as I like to brag on me. Microsoft loved that their top project manager was also a CEO and that I took that entrepreneurial mindset and applied that to my work. They love that I have those natural leadership tendencies. I know what it's like to lead something that personally matters to me. The opportunities that I'm trusted with are greater because of the assumptions about what my skills are. They'd love for me to bring that same excitement, passion, and drive to the mission and goals of their organization. There's a lot of recognition and opportunity for someone who has been able to do so much in such a little amount of time.
What does success look like for you?
It's so transient because there is always something more. From a brand perspective, we're growing the EDEN BodyWorks team. We're celebrating an amazing milestone - 15 years! Right now, we're in a period of gratefulness and thankfulness and really reflecting. We're really trying to take a moment to pause, reflect, and recenter and imagine what the next 15 years will be like - and how we'll change and how the industry will change. For EDEN, success will look like being able to publically share a plan of what the future looks like for us.
In tech, I'm making a pivot to working on my first non-hardware product. I've worked on Xbox, HoloLens, robots and artificial intelligence. Most recently, I've worked on Portal at Facebook. I just switched over to a team called Social Good, which is focused on making Facebook a positive force in the world. Our goal is to try to solve the problem to make sure the world has a safe and sustainable supply of blood. It's an interesting space where probably if you looked at my background, you'd be like "Why is she working in the health space?"
I was drawn to that in the same way I was drawn to start EDEN BodyWorks to make shampoo to help women understand the way you look is not a limiting factor on your trajectory in life. You can awaken, empower and change who these people think they can be or are allowed to be by providing the solution.
To learn more about Jasmine and how she's paving the way in the technology and beauty sectors, connect with her on Instagram @edensjasmine.
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When they met, Jason had just moved to Atlanta for a new job opportunity, and Elise was living happily in her career and had put dating on the backburner. But luckily, a mutual connection saw something in both of them and thanks to a yoga-themed baby shower and a chance text message, they found their forever. Check out their beautiful How We Met story below.
I’ll start with the easiest question. Can you both tell me a little bit about yourself and your background?
Elise: Sure, my name is Elise. I’m actually from Atlanta, GA – not a transplant. I grew up here and left right after college to pursue my career. Now I’ve been back going on eight years, and I’m in my early 40s.
Jason: And I’m Jason. I’m originally from Racine, Wisconsin. I went to school at Florida A&M University, so I am a rattler. I went back to the Midwest for a period of time, in Indianapolis. Now, I’ve been in the Atlanta area for a little over two and a half years.
Jason and Elise Robinson
Photo by FotosbyFola
Wow, that’s nice because Atlanta gets a bad rap when it comes to relationships. So you have to give us the deets. How did you two find each other?
Elise: So I work in TV and I was on-air for a number of years and then transitioned into being a producer and then a manager. As a producer, I’d always have guests on. And there was a woman who came on frequently named Rosalynn (@Rosalynndaniels, often referred to as The Black Martha Stewart), and we connected instantly. Anyway, she got pregnant right before COVID and invited me to a “modern-day yoga baby shower.” I came to support, but was also just curious about that theme.
I had an amazing time. And when it was over a few of us stuck around and convos got personal. She ended up asking me the infamous ‘Are you dating’ question. When I told her no, she decided to set me up. So I should tell you, in both of my only two serious relationships, I was set up – so I was like no.
But she pointed at her husband, who was folding up chairs, and said that another friend set her up with him. Sometimes, it takes people outside of us to see what we need. A few months later, she reached out and said she had family relocating and thought I’d really like him. So she gave him my number, and I reached out with a text. He responded with a call, and that night, we talked for about 2-3 hours. So that’s how we met. I was a little nervous because me and Rosalynn were starting a friendship, and here I was, talking to her family!
Jason: It was new for me too. Remember, I was new to the area, and I had heard so many “stories” about how people have been done wrong in the dating world. Whether it’s by theft or scamming (laughs). Plus, I had just got a new job and wanted to focus on that. But I did want to be able to date someone in a more personal way and see where it led. I felt like who better than someone who I trust to connect me. Rosalynn knows I’m private, about business life, and my personal life is important to me.
So let’s get into your courtship. What was your first date like?
Elise: We had our first convo on a Monday, and he asked me out the next day. I didn’t have any plans, but I still said no. I was just playing hard to get (laughs). But we were talking every day, and he told me he wanted to take me somewhere I’ve never been. And I’m like, you’re in my city! But he sends me three options, and sure enough, two of the places I hadn’t gone to. So, our first date was October 1, 2021, and somebody was 45 minutes late.
Now Jason, why were you 45 minutes late?
Elise: It was me – in my own city. I just got turned around, and the traffic was horrible. I kept calling him and giving him permission to leave. Full transparency: I probably wouldn’t have waited if the shoe was on the other foot. But this was my first sign of what I now know and love the most about him. It’s his patience. When I got there, I was frazzled and everything, but he was just super calm. It ended up being a great first date.
Jason: I remember just waiting and being concerned for her well-being. Because I know how traffic can be, especially when someone is rushing. I was just scrolling through my phone and looking through the menu. It was cool.
Elise and Jason Robinson
Courtesy
That’s beautiful. Now let’s talk about the “what are we” convo? Did you have one of those and if so, who initiated it and how was it?
Elise: I initiated it. Jason was dating me – and still does. But by this time, we had been on a number of dates. We were on our way to a winery, and we had a bit of a drive. So I decided to state my intention. We were just a few weeks in, but we were spending a lot of time together and we are people of a particular age. So I told him, I know Atlanta can be a Black man’s playground. There’s so many beautiful professional women here. But I’m dating with intention. I don’t want to kick it or hang with a good guy even though he’s not my person. I was done with all of that. So I’m “laying down the law” in my eyes, and he didn’t flinch. He let me finish and basically let me know we were on the same page. He was not trying to sow his royal oats.
Jason: Yeah, I was not trying to be Prince Akeem. But also, it was more so about setting a tone and goal for myself. My mama always told me to set my goals. And having a family was always one of mine. I think the biggest thing of it all, was I felt blessed – in terms of moving for work and meeting Elise, now being married. There’s victories being placed in my life.
I love that you both shared that because sometimes I get feedback on these stories and it seems like sometimes we’re afraid to really voice what we desire, no matter what that looks like.
Elise: Yeah, I think sometimes women feel like they don’t want to put pressure on their partner. But it’s not pressure. Look, Jason and I are based in faith, and what is for us is for us. Being upfront and honest is best – and early makes sense. You don’t have to convince someone to be your person.
Jason: I think her sharing those values resonated with me, and hearing her “lay down the law” was fine because I was there, too. I would say to millennial women, don’t be afraid to tell a mate what you want. You never know what that would lead to. Time is a precious commodity. Elise saying that early on showed me that she values both of our time. It showed her heart, character, and integrity, and I was drawn to that and the mature conversation. In the social media world, we don’t have those pointed conversations face-to-face. I would challenge readers to have those conversations in person, and you would get more from that convo than any post or reel. Because you see body language reactions and have deeper communication.
Yeah, I think sometimes women feel like they don’t want to put pressure on their partner. But it’s not pressure. Look, Jason and I are based in faith, and what is for us is for us. Being upfront and honest is best – and early makes sense. You don’t have to convince someone to be your person.
You both have mentioned time, family, and integrity. I’m curious what other core values do you both share?
Elise: Early on, our faith. Not just do you believe in God. It had to be deeper in that. I needed someone who would lead me, our home, and our family. I didn’t want to be in a push-and-pull relationship about prayer, church, or have conversations about being better people. Also, we discussed finances. That doesn’t just mean going to work. We chatted about ownership and what it looks like for us. How do we support each other individually and together? I know I like having my hands in a few different pots, and I needed someone who was supportive of that and likewise.
Jason: My background is that I was raised in the church. My father is a deacon and my mom is a deaconess. They've been married for 55 years. Faith was very important to me and it was crucial that my wife have that relationship as well.
Elise and Jason Robinson
Photo by FotosbyFola
Can we talk about challenges? Big or small, what are some things you had to grow through together?
Elise: I have never lived with anyone – not a roommate, a sister, friend, boyfriend or anything. Now, I’m in my 40s and I'm living with someone. When you’ve been by yourself for so long that was a challenge for both of us. We weren’t pulling each other's hair out but I’m a bit extreme. Things are color-coded in my closet. For me, working in news is chaotic so I want my home to be peaceful and organized.
Jason: I’m a man, and she’s a woman. That dynamic alone adds a flair to it. She wants things a certain way. She’s a Capricorn. But just in terms of how she wants to keep a home was a big adjustment for me. It took time.
On a smaller level, what are some of the things you disagree about day-to-day?
Elise: Cleanliness and systems. Like, he recycles and I do not. But sometimes I just have to decide if it really needs to be a thing or if I can just take care of it.
Jason: This is where my organization takes over (laughs).
What are your love languages? Do you know?
Elise: Jason’s is an act of service which works because I love cooking for him. It doesn’t feel like a chore to me. I love when I’m out, picking up his favorite juice. The other day I saw he needed t-shirts while folding clothes. So I just like doing small things for him that he doesn’t expect. He’s very much that guy that will ask to help so it doesn’t bother me.
Jason: I’d say Elise is all of them, but physical touch would probably be the biggest one. I had to get used to that. She’s taught me it in a number of ways. I remember we actually talked about love languages, and I sent her this song called “More Than Words” by Extreme. That explained to her how I felt.
Finally, can we end with the proposal? Tell us everything!
Jason: It was at a restaurant. And again, I was trying to find somewhere she hadn’t been. Also, I didn’t want to do it on our anniversary because that would have been too obvious. I contacted one of the restaurant’s staff and decided to change up the dessert menu. Each item was something special to us.
Elise: We go on so many date nights, so I just thought it was a regular night. We had finished eating, and I had to go to the bathroom. They had a nice mirror, girl. So I’m in there taking videos and stuff.
Jason: While she’s in the restroom, I’m getting everything in place with the waitress.
Elise: So as I’m reading the menu, I realize it’s telling our story and he eventually proposed. It was so special; I actually had the menu framed! It was so beautiful and thoughtful.
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Anyway, although it’s pretty true that whenever the topic of multiple orgasms comes up, it usually centers around women, the reality is that men are able to have them as well. Without much effort?Reportedly, less than 10 percent of guys in their 20s and less than seven percent of them over 30 can. For the record, what qualifies are guys who can naturally orgasm 2-4 times within an under two-minute timeframe. Yes, the percentile is low; that’s the bad news.
The good news is there are some hacks that can help those who don’t fall into the “automatically blessed in this way” category to become multi-orgasmic too. I’ve done some research and found five things that your man can do prior to sex to make having more than one orgasm easier for him along with five things that you can do during sex that can really take achieving the goal to another level.
Let’s dig in.
1. What He Should Do: Up His Testosterone
GiphyA main hormone contributor to orgasms is testosterone. So, it makes all the sense in the world that in order for a man to experience more of them, his testosterone levels would need to be at a peak level.Some natural ways to encourage your man to get his levels to where they need to be is to remind him to exercise at least three times a week, to get some time in the sun (and/or take a vitamin D supplement), to consume alcohol in moderation, to keep his stress levels to a minimum and to avoid taking in too many phytoestrogens (which is plant-based estrogen);some of those foods would include soy, dairy, sunflower seeds, grapes, collard greens (I know, right?) and beer.
2. What He Should Do: Do Some Kegels
GiphyWhenever the topic of Kegels comes up, it’s also usually in the context of women strengthening their pelvic floor in order to prevent/improve incontinence and make sex more pleasurable. However, did you know that men can benefit from a form of this type of exercise too? When men learn how toidentify and then strengthen their own pelvic floor muscles, it can give their genital region a lot more self-control.As a direct result, it can reduce symptoms related to erectile dysfunction, and premature ejaculation and it can potentially intensify their orgasms as well.
One way that a man can do a simple Kegel is by starting and stopping his urine streaming whenever he’s using the bathroom. Some other forms of male Kegel exercises can be foundhere andhere.
3. What He Should Do: Learn About Non-Ejaculatory Orgasms
GiphyThe “real ones” can rap damn near every lyric of Salt-N-Pepa’s “Whatta Man” (featuring En Vogue) from back in the day. In it, there are a couple of lines that say, “He takes his time and does everything right/Knocks me out with one shot for the rest of the night.” I mean, while that’s cool ‘n all (I guess — LOL), if you want a multi-orgasmic man, he’s gonna need to be able to accomplish more than that, chile.
And since once a man ejaculates, that’s where the refractory period (which is basically the period of time between when someone orgasms and is sexually responsive enough to be able to orgasm again), in order for a guy to be able to have several orgasms at one time more easily, NOT EJACULATING should be the goal.
This is where non-ejaculatory orgasms come in.
They are all about a man learning how to enjoy the sensation of an orgasm without ejaculating in the process. Your partner can learn more about how to achieve those by reading Men’s Health’s article here.
4. What He Should Do: Master Belly Breathing
GiphyYou’d be hard-pressed to read an article on how to have powerful or multiple orgasms without improving one’s breathing techniques not coming up in it. That’s because deep breathing helps to relax the body — and the more relaxed a person is, the easier it is for them to climax. That said, a great breathing technique for men is called belly breathing (ordiaphragmatic breathing); it’s all about getting on your back, putting one hand on the upper part of your chest while the other rests right below your rib cage.
As you take air in through your nose, focus on it coming from your lower belly area. If you do this, while the hand that is on your chest remains in the same spot, the one on your stomach should rise. As you exhale, tighten your abdominal muscles and then repeat. If you and your partner implement this as a form of foreplay prior to sex andyou use your hands to caress his chest as he focuses on his belly and breathing, it can be a gentle form of edging that can make achieving multiple orgasms for him easier once you start to engage in actual intercourse.
5. What He Should Do: Get More Rest
GiphyWhen you get a chance, check out the article that I penned for the platform a few years back entitled, “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand.” For now, I’ll just say that if your partner is sleep-deprived, that will make it challenging for him to have one orgasm, let alone several in a row. Two reasons whysleep deprivation is so problematic is because it can throw off hormones, increase stress, and heighten a man’s chances of experiencing erectile dysfunction. So, if your partner isn’t getting between 6-8 hours of rest on a pretty consistent basis, that is something else that can make having a multiple orgasm hella challenging.
Now let’s get into some things that you can do to help him in this area of sexual pleasure and satisfaction…
Getty Images
What You Should Do: Massage His Scrotum
GiphyThe reason why it’s so painful for a man to be hit “in the balls” (which means in his scrotum which is where his testicles are) is because that is a place that houses many nerve endings which makes it a highly sensitive place. Sexually,that’s a good thing because not only is it a powerful erogenous zone, but it can also boost a man’s chances of ejaculating. When it comes to multiple orgasms, you can gently knead them like dough while you’re giving him oral sex (because who said that multiple orgasms only had to come via intercourse?)
Or say that you’re in the missionary position; right as he’s about to ejaculate (ask him if he’s someone who doesn’t “announce it" in some way on his own), gently tug on his scrotum or roll his testicles in the palm of one of your hands as if it were a pair of dice. Between the sensation of already climaxing coupled with the feeling of his scrotum being erotically touched can be enough for him to have more than one orgasm — whether he was prepared to have one or not!
What You Should Do: Stimulate His Nipples
GiphyI actually once read that somewhere around 50 percent of men consider their nipples to be a bona fide erogenous zone. From what I’ve researched, a part of the reason is that the brain lights up whenever nipples are stimulated in a similar way that our genitalia is.
And so, by engaging in nipple play with your partner — lightly stroking his nipples, licking them, kissing them, etc.— not only does it help to intensify his orgasms, but it can also (potentially) shorten his refractory period which makes it easier for him to climax back-to-back.
What You Should Do: Get into Some Sensory Deprivation
GiphyIf you’ve never heard ofsensory deprivation before, in the context ofsexual activity, it’s when you’re intentional about pulling one of the senses — sight, touch, smell, taste, hearing — out of the sexual experience in order to increase the other four. For example, if you put a blindfold on your partner, if he can’t see what you’re doing, that increases his stimuli in other areas which can make it easier for him to climax and have more than one orgasm at a time. Something else that’s cool about sensory deprivation is it encourages people to focus more on anticipation than overthinking which is always highly beneficial in the sexual pleasure department.
What You Should Do: Talk Dirty to Him
GiphyDirty talking has all sorts of benefits. It appeals to the sense of hearing. It can let you and your partner both know what you want and need more of in a very sensual and seductive way. It can also help to distract your partner as you try to relax him for things like aprostate massage. Listen,it’s been said, for quite some time now, that a man’s G-spot is found in and around his prostate which includes the area in between his scrotum and his anus along with an inch or two within his anus opening.
And so, if you’re telling him how much he turns you on while you’ve got a lubed-up finger wandering around there, there’s no tellinghow many orgasms you’ll be able to give him — ones that he probably isn’t anywhere close to being prepared for. Straight up.
What You Should Do: Embrace His Penis. Fully.
GiphyThe more you embrace his penis, the more relaxed he’ll feel around you. So, try giving him an impromptu tantric lingam massage. Stroke his shaft with some coconut oil while going down on him. Have some ice in your mouth during oral sex. With the thumb and forefinger of each hand, gently stroke his penis in an up-and-down motion. Use a little peppermint oil mixed with a carrier oil like sweet almond or grapeseed to massage his shaft and scrotum as the menthol from the peppermint provides a tingling sensation.
Bottom line, take in everything about his penis and enjoy yourself while doing so. Chances are, the more creative you get, the more you’ll both discover stimulation points that he never even knew that he had — and when new territory is discovered, that means new peaks of sexual pleasure can be reached too!
Have fun, chile. BOTH OF YOU.
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Featured image by Giphy