Fight Those Holiday Blues: 5 Tips To Slay Your Friendsgiving
For some us, Thanksgiving won't be spent with grandma and her infamous mac and cheese or auntie's super-sweet sweet potato pie. Whether it's due to work obligations, finances, or the choice to save that coin for the Christmas flight home, some of us have to forgo the traditional experience for one that's a bit more local and practical.
Missing out on seeing family during the holidays can be a drag, but one thing that often kept my spirits up when I couldn't travel to see family--especially as a media professional often on deadline, paying expensive rent, or on a limited budget---would be having a Friendsgiving.
If you find yourself in this situation, here are a few tips to combat holiday FOMO and slay your Friendsgiving:
1.Get with the fun and be creative.
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Every great Friendsgiving I've ever been part of included music and games. Gather up the rest of your friends and pool your resources for games and playlists. Try a creative game of Twister, a stay-at-home sip-and-paint with wine and art supplies, or get a good Black Card Revoked card game going.
2.Put your cooking skills to the test.
For a Friendsgiving, I'd always challenge myself to learn something different to cook and bring for the potluck. I loved planning the grocery list and menu themes for these events. The great thing about this is that you can get away from the usual, and try something new. It also helped me expand the range of meals I can now whip up on the spot.
3.Give gifts early.
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This is a great opportunity to go ahead and offer a token of thanks for great friendship and, if you don't plan to be in town for Christmas, to offer gifts before you leave. Also, this can serve as a thoughtful preview to Christmas if planned as an organized activity for you and your friends to promote gratitude.
4.Plan a volunteer activity.
A friend of mine used to volunteer at a local soup kitchen during the Thanksgiving holiday, and afterward, she would continue with her usual Thanksgiving stops at various family members homes. Before the dinner, coordinate time with your friends to volunteer and choose something that's dear to all of your hearts. It's great for bonding and yet another reminder of things to be thankful for.
5.Create an after-dinner tradition.
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At home, my cousins and I would all go to the movies to see a new release. This was a yearly tradition since we were teens, and as we got older, it was our way---as members of the younger generations of the family---to get away from those annoying older family members who'd ask questions like, "When are you getting married?" or "When are you having children?" For Friendsgiving, I would coordinate the same tradition with friends when I couldn't travel home. Try attending a Thanksgiving-night party, bar-hopping, bowling, or karaoke. Just enjoy and think about the bonds you're strengthening.
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Eva Marcille Gets Real About Having To Rediscover Herself Following Divorce: 'I’m Not The Wife Anymore'
Eva Marcille is on the road to rediscovery following her divorce from Michael Sterling. The former couple was married for almost five years and share three children together, including the model’s eldest daughter, Marley Rae, whom Michael helped raise. The divorce has had a profound effect on her, which caused her to lose weight.
She received a lot of criticism for her weight loss following a photo she posted on Instagram, which resulted in her turning off the comments. During her recent appearance on the Tamron Hall Show, Eva spoke about the negative comments and life after divorce.
“I went through a divorce last year. Anyone who’s been through a divorce knows that divorce is hard. It’s like the stomach flu; you will be skinny afterward. If you drop a 200 lb person, you’re gonna drop at least 30 lbs,” she explained. “So, for me, I lost weight just naturally going through life, and I found myself depressed before my divorce, through my divorce, trying to just navigate and rediscover who am I.
“I’m not the wife anymore, not someone’s someone. I’m someone’s mom, but if I took the mom away, if I took Madam (her All The Queen’s Mencharacter) away, if I took Top Model away, like who is Eva? Who am I? And making sure that I prioritize knowing that character and building that.”
While the actress never specified why she ended her marriage to Michael, court documents said their marriage was “irretrievably broken” and “there are no prospects for a reconciliation.” Talking to Tamron, Eva shared that she is still hurting.
“This was my forever. My parents were married for 42 years, my grandparents died two months apart, like marriage forever, all my aunts and uncles, all my brothers are married. I’m like the black sheep,” she said. “It’s just, it was different, and the words hurt. What I can say is though I will be positive, I will find my cup half full always, it still hurts. It does.”
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Feature image by Derek White/Getty Images