I don't care how old we get, we can never be too old for a sleepover. So, why don't more of us do it? While things like schedules, partners and kids can make it challenging, I honestly believe that it's because a lot of us aren't sure how to throw one in such a way that it doesn't feel awkward or, let's be honest — childish.
If that's exactly what your line of reasoning is, because I personally think that there is something that's so wonderful and unique about sisterhood bonding, I've put together 15 tips that can make you want to host a grown ass sleepover and also cause your friends to want to RSVP ASAP.
1. Come Up with a Theme
To me, party themes are all about building up anticipation. It doesn't have to be anything deep. You can ask everyone to wear a certain color. You can focus on them coming dressed from a particular era. If you plan on going with a specific type of cuisine or music, folks can show up representing that. It's totally up to you. One way to give your guests an idea of what to expect is to send an e-card invite that has the theme featured on it. Paperless Post, Evite and Smilebox are just some of the online options you've got to choose from.
Getty Images
2. Cop Some Mattress Toppers
I'll be honest — sometimes I'll pass on an event like this (or not stay the night) simply because I'm getting too old to be sleeping all uncomfortable on the floor, even with a sleeping bag. Something that can immediately prevent this from being an issue is going to your local Walmart and picking up some mattress toppers (you know, like egg crates). You should be able to find a few for under twelve bucks. They can provide a bit of extra cushion, so that folks aren't waking up with a killer backache the following morning.
3. Potluck It. Kinda.
I recently had a birthday (Geminis, stand up!). When one of my friends asked me if I thought I would ever throw a party, in true Gemini fashion, I said, "Why? So I can go into debt while some folks weren't even thoughtful enough to bring a present?" Chile, please. Along these same lines, just because you may be the one who is hosting the sleepover, that doesn't mean that you need to be trying to figure out how to pay your rent once everyone leaves. Since food is probably going to be the biggest expense (well, that and liquor; I'll get to the latter in a bit), why not have everyone bring something? And to avoid ending up with nothing but plasticware, make specific requests. A dish and a bottle of something to get lit with should do.
4. Get Some Old School Candies
As you're gonna see with some of these other points that I'm going to make, one of the most fun things about a grown woman sleepover is cultivating an atmosphere of nostalgia. One way to do that is to include some bowls of candy that include old-school brands. Something that I like about the website Old Time Candy is it breaks candy down into sections like eras, flavors and types. You can peruse to your heart's content by clicking here; then order and have what you want delivered directly to your house.
5. Serve Snacks That Are Liquor-Infused
Speaking of stuff to snack-on, why not make the kind that are liquor-infused? There's a recipe for vodka chocolate-covered strawberries here. A recipe for vodka-spiked watermelon here. A recipe for drunken salsa here. A recipe for tequila-spiked caramel corn here. And all kinds of recipes for boozed-up ice cream here.
Getty Images
6. Put Together a Playlist from Your Collective College Years
Listen, I adore 90s R&B so much that I've got at least five graphic tees in honor of it. Every time I listen to music from that decade, I can literally hear a sigh come out of my body as I recall my college days. Taking out a couple of hours to put together a playlist from your own college years is a great way to get people hype and to hear some pretty awesome stories while songs are playing in the background — whether you went to school with your homies or not.
7. Stream a Couple of Throwback Movies
I already know that y'all got at least three streaming subscriptions thinking that it would be lower than your cable bill was (is it? LOL). So, why not look ahead of time for one or two movies that will take all of you back to either a simpler or more fun time (college anyone? 20s anyone?)? If you don't have streaming or cable, you might be able to find some gems on Tubi. It takes a little bit of digging and there are random commercials that pop up while viewing, but how much complaining can you do about a free app. Right?
8. Or, Binge-Watch a Favorite Black Sitcom
A show that I binge-watched a couple of years ago and thoroughly enjoyed is Survivor's Remorse. Now that it's back on BET, I've been catching up on it again. I also dig that TV One has put A Different World into rotation. Not only are both shows really good, they take me back to a time and place in my life that hold certain memories that I oftentimes don't think about until I do some binge-watching. Whether it's one of these or something else, maybe pull out five favorite episodes of a show that you and your girls used to like to watch all of the time. Even if you end up eating and talking while it's on, good Black programming always sets the best kind of atmosphere and tone.
9. Create a Signature Cocktail
Sometimes, I will do writing for wedding websites. It's there that I first heard of signature cocktails, and I like everything about the concept. Oftentimes, at wedding receptions, the bride and groom will have their own customized drink or they will come up with something that symbolizes them as a couple.
To commemorate your sleepover with your girls, why not make your own drink too? If you're down yet have no idea where to start, Sip Awards has some helpful tips here. Or, you and your friends can take a signature drink quiz, they can send the results to you and you can come up with a couple of mixtures that way (a cool quiz is right here).
10. And/Or Have Some Cotton Candy Cocktails on Tap
If you just read what I said and thought to yourself, "Girl, I'm gonna be good just to host this thing. What else, you got?", another option is to serve up a cocktail that already exists. One that tends to be a fan favorite is cotton candy cocktails that has strawberries, champagne, vodka, rosè, limes and cotton candy in it (the recipe is here). Talk about a drunkety-drunk-drunk sugar rush!
11. Then Play 20 Questions, Truth or Dare or Never Have I Ever with It
I've played all of these games with some of my girlfriends before and you know what — no matter how long I've known them and how much we've discussed before, when they've got some drinks in them, the game never ends without my mouth falling wide open, at least a couple of times. The main point here is to get an understanding, beforehand, that everything that is shared is confidential. Hell, if you want to makeshift some NDAs, I ain't mad at you. Celebrities do it all of the time. I totally get why.
12. Or, Go a Round of Social Sabotage
If y'all are more of an actual card or board game kind of person, BuzzFeed actually created a game called Social Sabotage (and yes, it's a card game). Basically, the box comes with two sets of cards — where and what. The best way to explain it would be that it's an online/smartphone version of truth or dare with a whole lot of twists to it. Things really could get kinda wild. Anyway, if you want to buy the game, go here. If you want to watch a video that explains how the game works, check that out here.
Getty Images
13. Paint Each Other’s Toenails (or Fingernails)
OK, while I know that spa activities are a traditional girls' night in move, my experience has been that oftentimes they end up being a lot more trouble than they're worth when it comes to setting up and cleaning up. A happy medium is to have some polishes available for folks to either paint each other's toenails or fingernails. Personally, while I'm good when it comes to my feet, I'm always thrilled when someone can help me to switch out colors for my fingernails when I'm in between mani/pedi appointments. It's a cool way to slow down the night.
14. Give Everyone Their Own Bonnet as a Party Favor
Y'all and these bonnets, boy. One day, I'll write something, just on that alone. For now, can we all agree that they were initially made to protect our glorious hair while we sleep at night? That said, I can't think of a more profound way to end a Black woman sleepover than to hand out a party favor in the form of a new bonnet. If you go to Etsy and put "bonnet" in the search field, you can find a variety that are made from Black women. Some merchants even customize, chile. #yourewelcome
15. Have Breakfast Delivered the Next Day
Once half of y'all are either slightly hungover or too tired to make that big breakfast that you see folks do on TV, I've got an idea. Since actually eating breakfast can help you to feel better after a night of getting totally lit up (so does drinking water or chewing on some ginger, by the way), why not have breakfast (or brunch, depending on the time y'all wake up) delivered?
If you're up to trying something new, My Recipes published "51 of the Best Breakfast Destinations in America". Also, your favorite delivery app should have a breakfast section for you to peruse. It's the perfect way to end an awesome sleepover, don't cha think? Have fun!
Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.
Featured image by Getty Images
RELATED
Yep. I actually read one survey (that consisted of 2,000 people) that said folks tend to have twice as much sex while they are on vacation than they do when they’re at home. It makes sense too when you factor in that you have less to do (unless you’re traveling with those folks who act like you need an itinerary for every damn thing — and we all know one…SMDH), which makes you less stressed out, which makes it easier to feel sexy and to want to get sexual.
And so, in the spirit of that indeed being the case, I want to make sure that you carve out a corner of your suitcase or carry-on to include at least half of the following 12 things that are on this list — things that can help to make “summer vacation sex”…that much hotter, y’all.
1. Edible-Grade Sunscreen
GiphyIt can’t be said enough that, no matter how melanated you may be, your skin needs sunscreen. Not only to protect yourself from the risk of skin cancer (which 1 in 5 Americans will get in their lifetime) but from premature aging that can come from sun damage too. That said, if the urge arises to have sex outside somewhere, I did find some edible-grade sunscreen, in case you’re either worried about what sex in the sun will do to your skin or how all of the chemicals in sunscreen will affect your (digestive) system. The company is called Sky & Sol and you can read up on them here.
2. Flavored Lip Balm
GiphyIf you’ve ever wondered why your lips are so susceptible to being chapped, it’s because they don’t contain any oil glans to keep them moisturized. This is especially important to keep in mind when the weather is extremely cold or hot because that can do a real number on the sensitive skin that your lips are made out of. That’s why it’s essential to stay well-hydrated and to also keep some lip balm in tow. Lip balm is especially designed to moisturize your lips, reduce chapping, exfoliate, soothe irritation and protect your lips from UV damage. As a bonus, lip balm will also help to keep your lips super soft and kissable; especially if you get the flavored kind. #wink
3. Condoms
GiphyI’m still out here, literally shaking my damn head, that reportedly, only one-third of men and one-fourth of women use condoms (and even many of those folks don’t do it consistently). It can’t be said enough that if you’re not in a monogamous (married) or exclusive (dating) relationship where you both are getting regularly tested and are on some other form of birth control (unless you want to get pregnant) — you absolutely should be using condoms and, as a woman, you should not solely rely on your partner to have some that are ready and available.
Not just because you should be responsible for your body and health but because not all condoms are made equal, so you should bring along some that you prefer/enjoy. If you’d like a lil’ help picking those out, check out “These Are The Kinds Of Condoms Your Vagina Would Actually Prefer.”
4. Crotchless Swimsuit
GiphyPacking some sexy lingerie? I certainly hope that goes without saying. If you’ve got a hot tub around, though and you want to “get it in” without getting totally naked (so that nosey people won’t see every damn thing), you do know that there are some crotchless swimsuits out in these streets, right? An example of one is here. Of course, you can always do what Beyoncé said in “Drunk in Love” and just move ish over to the side but…I’m just giving you another creative option…if you wanted one.
5. Blindfolds
GiphyIf you’d like to cultivate an atmosphere of mystery or anticipation, a simple blindfold will do the trick. There is another reason why I think they are great for summer vacation (sex) trips, though — if your hotel room doesn’t come with blackout curtains and you want to have a quickie or two without the room being so bright, putting on a blindfold can solve that “problem” too.
6. Waterproof Sex Toys
GiphyWho said that you have to wait until you get to your hotel room to engage in some foreplay? If you bring a couple of sex toys around, you can tease each other practically anywhere — and if they are waterproof, that includes in the ocean or pool. Some, you can pair up with your smartphone in order to stimulate your partner from just about anywhere. Whew, chile.
7. Homemade Sex Toys Too
GiphySpeaking of sex toys, you’d probably be amazed at how many things in your house can double up as one. A spatula or wooden spoon is great for spanking. A necktie, some tights and a pair of clothespins work well for BDSM (use your imagination, sis). An electronic toothbrush is its own vibrator. A string of (lubricated) pearls in between your thighs? Girrrl…GIRL. Oh, and cop a silicone ice tray that comes in different shapes.
When you are rubbing ice in the shape of fruit, flowers or even animals over each other’s bodies, you’ll be surprised by how the combination of the cold with the texture of the space of the ice will stimulate you (make the ice out of juice instead of water for an extra sweet treat!).
8. Portable Charger
GiphyI don’t know what took me so long to get a damn portable charger but it’s one of the best things that ever happened to me. What I personally purchased is the ANKER Zolo Power Bank, 20,000mAh 30W High-Speed Portable Charger. I can throw it in my purse, it charges fast, I can use more than once before needing to recharge it; plus, it complements most devices. A great thing to keep in mind, so that your sex toys don’t end up going out on you while you’re…wherever you are.
9. Massage Oil Candle
GiphyGoing through security at the airport can be a HEADACHE. And while, how long it can take, oftentimes varies on the airport you’re at and the time you are traveling (you can read more about that here), the process is going to be especially annoying if they have to go through your bags. Since you can currently only pack a quarter-sized bag of liquid products on your carry-on, my two cents would be to leave the massage oil at home and pack a massage oil candle instead.
That way, you can still engage in some temperature play (check out “Hot Sex: 10 Super Sultry Reasons To Bring Wax Play Into Your Bedroom”) while you’re on the road without going through any security hassle hang-ups. Some edible massage oil candles are located right here.
10. Wine Cooler Sleeve
GiphySay that you end up going on a wine tasting tour while you’re on vacation and you end up purchasing a bottle or you simply want to toast with some champagne but you’re not sure how to store the bottle. Did you know that there are wine cooler sleeves that are lightweight, portable and will help to keep your bottles cold without condensation for hours on end? A brand that comes highly recommended is here.
11. Rose Petals
GiphyI think there are a few reasons why rose petals are oftentimes used to create a sexy mood. Red symbolizes love and passion. Rose petals are soft to the touch. The scent of them is considered to be an aphrodisiac as well. For all of these reasons, bring along some fresh rose petals for your hotel bed. If you put a damp paper towel in something like a small Tupperware container and then place the rose petals inside of that, they won’t dry out quickly which will make them feel great once you’re ready to start rolling around in them (you can also keep them in your hotel room’s fridge to further extend their shelf life).
12. Mints
GiphyMorning sex. Outdoor sex. Whatever kind of sex — it’s always going to be better when your breath and his smell good. And just so you don’t have to lug around a big bottle of mouthwash, pack some mints. Altoids are always going to be my number one draft pick — yet go with whatever are your personal faves. They’re the perfect hack for unbelievable summer vacation sex. Wouldn’t you agree? Enjoy!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy