Ladies, Here Are 4 Indicators It's Time To Shoot Your Shot
It's hard as hell for a person to know when they should go for the bait. It can be quite confusing, to be honest. So many signals can become mixed when It comes to figuring out if someone is interested in you or they are just simply being polite.
Amongst being curved, embarrassed, or getting our lil' feelings hurt, it could also be quite intimidating to make a play for that Zaddy that you have your eyes on, but let's make sure we all have a clear understanding, ladies. There is a total difference between showing that handsome stud that you're interested versus full-blown chasing a man and scaring his ass off. It's all about reciprocity and vibes. If a man is showing the same type of interest in you as you are in him or giving strong hints, then that's your time to analyze your "go" signal thoroughly and go for the shot.
Shooting your shot doesn't have to a be a life sentence of curvedom. If you know what signs to look for and get rid of the outdated mindset that a man has to pursue you first, it could actually be an all-around confidence booster; a feeling of gaining your power back. It's simply about getting comfortable in knowing you have the capability of being "the chooser" and don't have to wait on a man to decide if you are worthy of being chosen.
Once you put yourself out there and show your interest, if he is interested, trust and believe he will take the lead from there. As scary as an ego hit can be, if the ball is in your court and you don't take the opportunity to score a winning shot, how else would you know what it feels like to win in the game of love? Scroll below for four ways to know it's finally time to shoot your shot:
Direct Eye Contact
If your future bae is giving you the googly eyes, you better believe that you have some type of captivating quality that has caught his attention. Men will typically shy away or look off from women they aren't interested in, all in hopes of not giving the wrong signal. But if he keeps gazing at you, looking directly in your eyes and making himself known to you, sis, that man is trying to catch your attention. It's up to you now to work your magic. Brush into him by accident, signal him over, or just plain out spark up a conversation with him. Men love humor, so compliment him in a playful way and see where it goes from there.
Pay attention to the details. If he is being particularly conscious about his appearance while he's in your presence, you might have hooked your dream guy on the low. When he's overly smiling, biting his lips, fixing his cuff links, belt, or tie constantly, or touching his beard or hair over and over, he's more than likely trying to flaunt his best assets and he wants you to notice him. Men always want to be seen as masculine and powerful so if he's facing towards you, leaning in close, or he's tryna find a suitable place to put his hands, you've got this man intrigued and he wants to get closer to you; it's time to make a move.
You know the saying "actions speak louder than words"? Well in this case, that's a sure bet. This is probably one of your easiest clues to tell when you should be pushing up on your possible man-to-be, or one of your options (if that's your cup of tea). A man is very unlikely to touch you in any way if he isn't somewhat interested in you. He might rub against you subtly, brush his hand over your shoulder, graze the small of your back with his palm, or simply grab your hands and hold them. Even if words haven't been exchanged about what's going on between the two of you, the physical chemistry speaks volumes and the volume is up loud and clearly saying, "Throw the ball in his court, sis."
This is more than likely the case for most of my millennial babes when it comes to meeting men via social apps. Most people have social media buddies or crushes that they chat with on a regular through DM, but even though you're chatting, you could be unsure what the vibe is with that person if they aren't sending you direct heart eye emojis. An easy way of knowing if he's worth scoring an alley-oop on is if he is being extremely flirtatious with you. When he's giving you compliments, saying nice things to keep you inspired or motivated, or showing interest in you, in general, he's giving you an open opportunity to show interest back. He's more than likely testing the waters to see how he can get in good graces with you and, if you're digging him, this is the ultimate time to let him know he's appreciated and slide him that number so you can text and not chat through DM.
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Corein Carter is a Los Angeles-based blogger, content creator and podcaster. The New Jersey native has had a love affair with words since she began penning poetry in high school and later went on to study journalism at WSSU. The self-proclaimed "Naturalista" embodies all things spiritual, plant-based, and self-care in both her daily life and through writing. You may recognize Corein's captivating voice and well-rounded perspectives from her fast growing podcast "Play on Words". Follow her journey on Twitter and Instagram @inlivingcolored.
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Many have wondered if one time is ever enough to see Queen Bey. Some argue yes. However, many of us on the opposite end of the spectrum, including myself, would disagree. Beyoncé's "Renaissance World Tour" is a universal yet varying experience for everyone who attends. In the words of Oprah Winfrey, the concert is "transcendent." For millennials, we have over two decades of her catalog that has served as the soundtrack for many of our lives and painted a personal portrait of our most coveted thoughts. Her music provides mental clarity and self-expression by serving as a universal language that has united fans from all walks of life through community, fashion, self-acceptance, and healing.
With a multi-layered approach to her artistry, just as she did on that winter day in December 2013 with the infamous digital drop of her self-titled album, she changed the game again on February 1, 2023, when she announced her world tour in support of Renaissance, her seventh studio album. Her cultural impact set the internet ablaze, with everyone trying to gather their coins, barter for presale codes, and figure out which cities to attend. The group chats were lit, and the Beyhive was stressed trying to get their hands on tickets.
Photo courtesy of Dontaira Terrell
Unfortunately, I was in that number. As the concert dates passed by and the one in my city drawing near all roads led to disappointment. With time ticking on the day of the Miami show and less than two hours to spare, my wallet bit the bullet, and I purchased three last-minute tickets, costing roughly $700.00 a piece (including fees) for me, my 9-year-old and 16-year-old nieces in Section 121 at the Hard Rock Stadium. With 10 minutes before showtime, we eagerly awaited the Queen to take the stage. A sea of metallic fringes, cowboy hats, disco fans, and western boots were in full effect and filled the entire stadium.
As the lights dimmed, a flood of emotions instantly overtook my body. It continued with each note she belted, along with nearly 50,000 roaring fans. The reverberating sound of the music through the stadium transported me from one era of my life to the next. As a teen girl in her bedroom daydreaming about her first love to blossoming into an unapologetic Black woman who is still on a road of self-discovery while learning to lean into the power anthem of "You won't break my soul." For over two hours, and with each set, I felt joy, love, peace, and a commanderie with fellow concertgoers. It was therapeutic as I danced like no one was watching and sang as if I were alone in my bathroom mirror.
There were no bars held, and I realized at that moment, "Nobody can judge me but me." The "Renaissance World Tour" proved to be so vast, and my Black girl joy was re-invigorated. It was magnetic and liberating, and I had to attend again, but this time, I needed to be up close and personal; I needed to be on the floor. In the days that passed, I watched more social media clips in different cities and asked myself if I would really splurge again to attend another Renaissance show.
Photo courtesy of Dontaira Terrell
After all, this would be my thirteenth time (maybe more because I lost count) seeing Beyoncé live, whether she was on tour with Destiny's Child, as a solo artist, or doing a live appearance. I contemplated for a while, but it worked itself out on its own. I was gifted two tickets and the next thing I knew, I was off to LA to attend another Renaissance show with floor seats at SoFi Stadium during Beyonce's 42nd birthday weekend! This time, things were different: no kids were allowed. It was adults only this go round.
Although the energy at the Miami and Los Angeles shows was empowering, infectious, and a celebration of life, happiness, and identity, they each provided their own unique experience. However, both concerts were what I needed for my well-being, leaving me with sore feet from dancing the night away, on vocal rest for the next few days from screaming at the top of my lungs, and on an indefinite high on life.
My introduction and love for Beyoncé began in 1996, while my older sister lived in Houston, TX, right before Bey hit the scene in 1998 with "No, No, No" as a budding R&B member. Her evolution twenty-seven years later as an international superstar and into womanhood has been an incredible journey to witness. As Mrs. Carter reminds each of us in the audience every night before the curtain closes, "I want you to remember this moment, where you're standing, who you came with, and take it with you. I hope you feel inspired."
I truly felt inspired, so thank you, Queen Bey. You awakened my inner child, and I will definitely remember these moments and take them with me.
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Feature image by Kevin Mazur/WireImage for Parkwood