I Tried Pattern Beauty On My Type 4 Hair & Here’s What I Think
As a proud member of the natural hair community for 15 years, I've seen all types of hair brands come and go - all with the claim of defining curls, adding moisture and being the new "IT" collection for all of us curly girls. Some brands definitely made big waves within the natural hair community and as the movement continued, others wanted in on the action, including big brands that never used to be inclusive (like ever), and of course celebrities.
My straight hair before.
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
My curls after.
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
As a lover of all things beauty and hair, Tracee Ellis Ross is a fashion and hair icon all her own and was a trailblazer in her own right. She was one of the first black women to wear her hair in its natural state YEARS before it became a movement and now, a trend. So when I found out last fall that she was launching her own haircare brand, Pattern, I knew I HAD to try it. Because, duh, it's Tracee!
Of course, with any new product launch, the natural hair nazis were out in true form and the reviews were a mixed bunch. The overall thought was that it was great for looser textured curls, any tighter and it was flop. As fate would have it, I received a PR package shortly after it launched so I decided I was up for the challenge for my super thick and curly fro.
Needless to say, I felt in my gut that it could go really good, or REALLY bad. So I cleared my schedule and began my wash day ritual and this was my experience:
From (L to R): Pattern Hydration Shampoo, Pattern Heavy Conditioner For Coilies, Pattern Jojoba Oil Hair Serum & Pattern Leave-In Conditioner
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
When I first opened my PR package, I was IMPRESSED! The packaging was so chic, so special and just so TRACEE! Even if I didn't end up liking the products, I'm an artist so I can at least appreciate the packaging and marketing which was so captivating. The package even include a Manifesta - an ode to black hair and curls of all textures - and I even got a Denman brush, microfiber towel, hair clip and a fine mist water bottle. A natural girls' best friend!
Pattern Hydration Shampoo
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
First up was the Hydration Shampoo. After several tries with other shampoos that have dried my hair out in the past, for me, this shampoo would be the true test to see how the line would take to my hair. Also, after having my hair straightened for two weeks, I was pleasantly surprised that not only did my hair feel hydrated while shampooing but my hair was slowly reverting back to its natural state! The shampoo was truly hydrating, created a gentle lather and left my hair feeling super soft. After rinsing out the product, my curls were already popping.
Pattern Heavy Conditioner For Coilies and the Pattern Jojoba Oil Hair Serum
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Next, I deep conditioned with the Pattern Heavy Conditioner For Coilies and the Pattern Jojoba Oil Hair Serum. The conditioner was a bit thick for my liking but I made sure to drench each section with water to help distribute the conditioner evenly which made a huge difference. I also applied the Jojoba Oil for an extra moisture boost and used the "Green House Method" with a hot head bonnet and plastic cap for about 20 minutes to trap in moisture. After I rinsed it out, my hair was uber soft and hydrated, so even though I didn't like the texture of the Conditioner For Coilies, it did it's job. Period.
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Pattern Leave-In Conditioner
Because the wash and shampoo process was so seamless, it made the styling process a literal dream! I applied the Leave-In Conditioner to each section, applied water to distribute the product evenly, and detangled with the Denman Brush (a must-have). I loved the texture of the Leave-In Conditioner (really creamy) but I was a little apprehensive about it being enough to style my hair, so I kept it simple with a traditional "Wash & Go".
After detangling each section, I applied a little Jojoba Oil to the ends of my hair and applied it onto each section to smooth my curls. It took only 25 minutes because my hair was super easy to detangle and so soft which made styling it a piece of cake! Afterwards, I sat under the hair dryer for 30 minutes and finished drying with a diffuser from roots to tips.
The Final Look:
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
When I tell ya'll this is one of thee BEST "Wash & Gos" I've done in a long time, I mean it! After drying, I fluffed it out with my hair pick and my curls rose in all their glory! All of the products worked wonders in my type 4, normal porosity, highly dense curly hair - I was literally amazed!
Tracee DID that! My hair was super supple and because I only used one product, it turned out big and fluffy but still had definition; the ultimate goal for curly hair. I would definitely rate this product line an A-.
I always tell people that each head of hair is different and that products work differently even if you have the same supposed "type" of hair. It's NEVER an exact science. But I can truly say that Pattern Beauty worked in my hair even after seeing tons of mixed reviews (and I obviously had my doubts) but I took a chance and was really shook. Pattern Beauty proved me wrong and has allowed me to STAN for Tracee Ellis Ross even more!
Featured image by Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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I think we all can agree that social media really is a double-edged sword. What I mean by that is there is just as much bad that can come out of it as good. At the end of the day, it really is about 1) having your own mind, 2) finding balance when it comes to how much time you spend online, and 3) doing your own research instead of taking random people’s opinions as the gospel (i.e., facts).
Gee, I wish more folks did all of this when it comes to if a man needs to have a large penis to sexually satisfy a woman (he does not) and if a woman who has had multiple sex partners will ultimately end up with a vagina that is too large for smaller penises to please her (a lie).
Science totally has my back on debunking both of those things (more on that in a bit). Know what else does? A particular type of sex method that is becoming more popular by the day. One that just might convince you to, as they used to say back in the day, focus less on the “size of the wave” and ride out the “motion of the ocean” instead.
It’s called shallowing. Here’s what it’s all about.
What Is Shallowing?
GiphyIf there’s one thing that I wish folks would say more thoroughly when it comes to women and orgasms, it’s that when it comes to75 percent of women not being able to orgasm from only intercourse, the accurate statement is they struggle with achieving a vaginal orgasm without the assistance of some type of clitoral stimulation. Yeah, we’ve really got to remember that very few things in this life are a complete monolith — orgasms included (check out “U-Spot Orgasm, Fantasy Orgasm & 6 Other Orgasms You Should Try Tonight”).
In fact, it was while I was reading up on pairing — a word that is used for when clitoral stimulation transpires during penetration — that I decided to do some deep-diving into shallowing (because it was mentioned inone of the articles that I read).And what is it? Shallowing is when a penis, finger, tongue, or sex toy of some sort is used in order to ever so slightly penetrate the vaginal opening of a woman.
And why is shallowing not just a current sex trend but something that every woman on this planet should try? It’s because of what I’ve said, more than once, on this platform: it focuses on the most sensitive part of a woman’s vagina, which isthe first two inches of her vaginal opening.
When the emphasis is placed there, not only does it increase your chances of experiencing “the big O,” but it can also build up anticipation, which can intensify your orgasms too — yes, shallowing can also be seen as a form of edging.
Another thing that’s cool about shallowing is — and it really and truly can’t be said enough — something that makes vaginal and blended orgasms easier to achieve for some women really has little to do with the size of a man’s package or even his technique; it’s straight up anatomy. Yep, the closer that a woman’s clitoris is to her vaginal opening, the easier it is for a penis to stimulate both. So, science makes it possible for vaginal orgasms to be easier for some women than others.
At the same time, shallowing can make it possible for more women who want to see what a vaginal orgasm actually feels like (because it’s easier for the head of the penis to stimulate the opening of the vagina while the shaft can rub up against your clitoris; based on the position that you are in, of course — the missionary with some pillows propped under the lower part of your back is ideal for this).
Now that you see what shallowing actually is, do you get why I said that penis size doesn’t matter when it comes to doing it — and getting the kind of orgasms that you want? Contrary to popular belief, your vagina is only around four inches. In fact, some health experts say that it ranges between 2-4”. Anything larger, your body literally has to stretch out to accommodate; this includes penises and babies. So, if your vagina is “making room” for more than four inches, why in the world do you think you need a 10-inch man? Yeah…exactly. It really is time to get over the silliness. The average penis continues to be 5.5”. Makes sense when you take it all in (no pun intended).
Aight, so now that you know what shallowing is all about, let me try and hard sell you on why it’s a sex technique that you should try as soon as tonight (if you possibly can).
1. It takes the pressure off of you and your partner.
I’ve been working with couples for almost 20 years at this point. This means that the topic of sex comes up quite a bit. And if there’s one thing that continues to be an issue is inconsistent orgasms (check out “Why Do Orgasms So Often Seem Like A ‘Hit-Or-Miss’ Experience For Women?”).
Listen, no matter how many articles you read or sex positions you try, if you’re anxious, stressed out, or overthinking, it’s gonna get in the way of you experiencing high peaks of pleasure on a consistent basis. Since shallowing is something that can easily be done even in foreplay (via fingering and/ororal sex) if you get that first “release” off, that makes it easier to just sit back and enjoy the ones that (hopefully) are to follow.
2. It teaches you more about your vagina.
A part of the reason why I keep repeating certain facts about vaginas in these articles is that it’s amazing how little certain things are discussed en masse — like the size of the vaginal tube. And since shallowing helps you to stimulate the nerve endings at the entrance of your va-jay-jay along with your G-spot (which is housed a little ways from your opening), shallowing is a great way to explore that area of your body as you figure out what truly works for you and…what doesn’t.
3. It’s the perfect merging of foreplay and intercourse.
When you really stop to think about it, shallowing is like the bridge between foreplay and intercourse because you can use so many different things to do it. So, if you want to experiment with a new sex toy or you want a bit more time to “warm up the engine” before full-on penetration begins, shallowing is one of the most sexually arousing compromises there is.
4. It can help to increase your partner’s stamina.
A few years back, I penned an article for the site entitled, “We’ve Got Some All-Natural Ways To Increase Stamina & Sensitivity.” Listen, even though I onceread a GQ article that said that over 60 percent of the people they polled were fine with intercourse lasting no longer than 5-10 minutes — that poll doesn’t speak for all of us, chile.
So, if you would like your man to build up to going longer, shallowing can help to make that happen. Since he’s barely putting beyond the tip in, he can learn how to be in you for longer periods of time without being, well, in you.
5. It helps you to appreciate whatever “package” he has.
Again — and it really can’t be said enough — if shallowing is all about exploring the mere entrance of your vagina, you don’t need a man with BDE (check out “BDE: Please Let The 'It Needs To Be Huge' Myth Go”) or honestly, even anything close to it.
I mean, even though, reportedly, the size that the average woman says gives her the most orgasms is eight inches — I bet those women have never really tried shallowing before. 10”, 8”, or the average 5.5” can certainly get the job done. And well.
6. It feels A-MAZ-ING.
Okay,so now that you know about shallowing, I promise that if you put the word into your favorite search engine, you’re either gonna see articles on golfing (LOL) or sex, especially as of late. That’s because more couples are trying it out and getting mind-blowing results from it. So, if you’re looking for something new to try, give shallowing a shot.
Hey, anything that’s designed to stimulate your most intense vaginal nerve endings has got to be something for the record books. I mean, how could it not be? Lawd.
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Featured image by Juan Moyano/Getty Images