The Number One Soft Skill You Need To Thrive In Your Career
You just started your first job out of college. What you prepared for your entire life to jumpstart your career is this very moment. You've set performance goals, and you've started your list of senior leaders you plan to set lunch dates with, but are you communicating well with your manager? As you prepare for your future, which can be next year, next week or even tomorrow, one thing we all forget to take ownership of is our communication skills.
How we communicate is vital in our growth and will be a pain point in your formative years in your career.
"As new grads starting their first job out of college, communication can be your greatest asset or challenge," shared Meredith Moore Crosby, author of "Getting Unstuck: A Guide To Moving Your Career Forward", a guide on how to advance at work. From emails to phone or in-person meetings, the way you communicate in a corporate setting doesn't come with your degree. It's on the job soft skills you pick up from managers, peers, and companies, but it's a skillset some organizations expect you to have right away.
Crosby is a communications expert who managed teams at Verizon, McDonald's, 3M and Comcast and understands how communications can be pivotal in "navigating the unwritten rules" of corporate America. "It starts with the understanding [that the rules] exist and getting clarity early about what your manager and the people who can decide your fate at work [want]. Whether you get promoted or fired all depends on how you react and communicate," she shared.
Here are her tips for working through communication challenges that present themselves at work:
Understand how your manager communicates.
"Most of us hope to work at our first real job for a while. Your first job is where you'll develop skills, friendships, and habits. Often the company culture shows up in how people communicate, so the first few weeks can be difficult while you learn the unwritten rules," shared Crosby. She advises that you open communication lines with regular one-on-one meetings. You create a road map to how you'd like to communicate your progress or challenges with your manager.
She suggests you assess how your manager interacts during the early days of your new job by asking these three questions:
- How do people get more information on the direction?
- How would you like to give me feedback on my work?
- How will I know if I am off track or missing your expectations?
Ask for clarity when you don't understand what your manager wants.
Sometimes the directions our managers give us aren't always clear. However, we often hit a crossroad when considering whether to ask for clarification or figure it ourselves. Will our manager think we are incompetent if we don't understand our assignments? But what if we work on the task inefficiently by doing the wrong thing?
To help with understanding your work, Crosby suggests you ask for examples, templates, or expectations when you receive new assignments.
"Take time when getting new work to reconfirm the expectations, timeline, and what to do if you have existing priority work," she explained. She suggests asking for clarity before agreeing by saying, "Thanks for the opportunity to work on this! I was working on XX as we discussed in our weekly one-on-one, should I switch gears and focus on this based on when you want to see something?"
Remember written communication can follow you.
Emails and messaging software like Slack are like social media. Even if you delete it, it can't be unseen by others, and it can be printed or referred to over and over again. "Remember, it's a written document that can come up in legal issues in the future. Never joke, be sarcastic or make comments you wouldn't want to clarify in a court of law," Crosby shared. Her three tips for managing email communications at work include:
- Be respectful, kind, and conscious of the timeliness of your email. When in doubt, talk in person and resolve an issue or opportunity immediately.
- Use bold to highlight actions and don't be afraid to resend friendly reminders if you don't get a response.
- Get an email buddy. Ask them to review your message for tone, clarity, and to make sure you aren't getting distracted by your perspective.
Find a mentor.
There's always that one person at work who sends great emails and gives excellent speeches at work. They capture your attention every time they speak at a meeting or send an email. If you have identified that person at work, Crosby believes that that person can be a mentor for you.
"Find a role model and if possible, build a relationship, and you can potentially cultivate a mentorship where you can get individual feedback. In the meantime, consider how they would respond in situations where you might feel stuck."
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Featured image by Shutterstock
Originally published on September 2, 2019
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Brittney Oliver is a marketing communications professional from Greater Nashville. Over the past three years, Brittney has built her platform Lemons 2 Lemonade to help Millennials turn life's obstacles around. Her platform is known for its networking mixers, which has brought over 300 NYC young professionals, entrepreneurs, and creatives together to turn life's lemons into lemonade. Brittney is a contributing writer for Fast Company and ESSENCE, among other media outlets.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Keith Powers On His Grooming Routine & Expressing Himself Through His Hair
Keith Powers is taking his crown back — that being his hair.
From a young age, the 30-year-old actor recalls having little say on how his hair was presented. As many of his friends and cousins had the liberty to experiment with hairstyles like cornrows, plaits, and fros, Powers’ parents opted for an easier look: a no-fuss, bald fade. “Man, I just want to grow my hair out,” he tells xoNecole. “When I was young, and I was like, 'Yo, when I get older, I'm doing whatever I want to my hair.'”
In time, Powers’ desire to test the limits of his hair’s potential grew from an act of intentional rebellion to a symbol of pride in his culture and textured hair. From his signature fade to red-carpet-ready tapered cut topped with curls, the New Edition Story star is no stranger to experimentation and switching his styles up. “That's why I do so many things like dye my hair," he shares. “It's just having pride in my hair, my look, and how I want to style it because my hair is a representation of how I feel in the moment.”
As one of Hollywood’s most talented stars, Power understands the influence of Black culture when setting trends and moving the needle within the industry.
A recent shift within the men’s grooming space has made room for an increasing focus on personal style and the creative pioneering in men’s hairstyling. With this in mind, Powers is using his platform to support and celebrate the new wave of Black men’s hair expression, in every way they choose to wear it. “I’m learning that there’s really no limitation on what I want to do with my hair,” he says. “Whatever I'm expressing with my hairstyle doesn't define who I am as a person.”
KISS Colors & Care and Keith Powers have joined forces in a new partnership that highlights the brand's signature collection designed specifically for curly and coily hair textures. Their custom line of products and accessories range from the Twist Curl Gel, and Twist King, to a curated selection of brushes, picks, durags, and sponges to help men nourish and protect their hair while also expressing the versatility and diversity of textured hairstyles.
Powers spoke to xoNecole about his hair grooming routine, how his hair allows him to express his personal style, and what he hopes to impart to his future children about loving and embracing their natural hair.
xoNecole: One thing that’s clear about your personal haircare/style over the years is that you’re not afraid to play around with classic haircuts like a fade, the tapered high top you have now. How has your exploration through these hairstyles influenced your overall sense of identity and self-expression?
Keith Powers: Growing up, I felt like my hair wasn’t presentable until it was cut all the way off. That’s kind of how my family would make it sound. Maybe there's a little baby trauma, but my parents were young, and they were learning. Now, I know I can express myself through my hair, and I don’t have to feel like my hair isn't professional in this setting because no matter what hairstyle you have, you can make it professional. I'm expressing myself now, and I know that doesn't define who I am like in the workplace or professionally.
xoN: Talk to us a little bit about your personal grooming routine. What are some of the products or brands that you reach for when it comes to your personal care?
KP: That's what I'm still trying to figure out. I always grew up not really having much hair on my head, but the Kiss Twist Gel Hair Gel has really been helpful with holding my hair together after hitting it with the curling sponge.
I really like to condition my hair as much as I can throughout the week. I try to do a treatment, like a treatment, and then I condition it. I switch so many conditioners — I just know I need to condition my hair because my scalp gets really dry. But I think I'm still really learning how to take care of my hair and that's with asking my friends for advice on different products to keep my hair moisturized. I think that's the hardest thing for me. I really feel like my hair dries out really fast. So it's a constant battle every day, but this is a fun one.
xoN: You’ve spoken openly about the significant role your father has played in your life and your desires of being a father and husband yourself one day. What would you teach your future children about self-care and self-expression?
KP: I think about that a lot. Kids really like to imitate what they see, so as a parent, you gotta find that balance of, okay, I want them to express themselves, but I have to do what's convenient for me and my kid when we’re getting ready in the morning.
I would love it if my future daughter wanted locs, but at the same time, she might want to switch things up and want to try different things. I just want my future kids to know that their hair, whatever texture it is, is beautiful and that they can express themselves how they want.
xoN: What advice would you give to others looking to experiment more with their hair and personal style?
KP: Just like Coach Prime says, ‘When you look good, you play good, and they pay.’ So it's really just about how you feel. I get inspired by watching films and animation, too. If I'm watching an animation, I'm like, ‘Yo, this hairstyle is fire, I could see myself doing something close to that.’ Sometimes, my hair makes me feel like a superhero. When I dye my hair, I really feel like a character out of a movie; it inspires and motivates what I wear, too. However you’re feeling, do it.
As you're looking for your look, or if you already have your look, just try different things. It’s fun and dope to see people, especially our people, express themselves with their hair because we can do so much with our hair, why minimize?
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Featured image by Ivan Apfel/Getty Images