This year, Lizzo taught us how to do our head toss and check our nails, and recently she spilled the details of her "good as hell" skincare routine that will give your melanin all the juice.
In an interview with The New York Times, Lizzo revealed that being on tour can make developing an effective skincare routine especially difficult. Our phones, our minds, and our skin all have one thing in common: they all need to recharge every now and then, and Lizzo can totally relate:
"So I was on the road, and I was sleeping in my makeup a bunch. It was so embarrassing. What am I, a child? And I was waking up and thinking I'm invincible, nothing can happen to me!"
I, too, am guilty of the "I'm way too lit to wash my face" vibe that ensues after a night out, and I am way too familiar with the consequences. Lizzo says that after sleeping in her makeup one night too many, she woke up to a nightmare:
"Then one day my face broke out — not even broke out in acne, but red and irritated. I was like, 'Oh my God, this is what happens when you party all night and you don't wash off your makeup.'"
Her experience led her to put her skin through an intensive "rehab" that included wearing a face mask to bed every night. Later, Alexx Mayo, Lizzo's makeup artist, introduced her to Sunday Riley and the rest is history.
"I have the C.E.O. Glow Oil— it's so sick. There's vitamin C and turmeric in it. I'm obsessed with the way vitamin C smells — like oranges. I love oils in general. Black girls, we're always using cocoa butter, coconut oil and shea butter on our bodies. I'm an oily bitch."
In the morning, Lizzo splashes her cheeks with Evian facial spray to ensure that her face stays hydrated AF, and in the evening, she's back to her primary facial system, using the Sunday Riley face wash as a cleanser. She explained:
"I have the whole Sunday Riley system now. I don't mix systems. I would mix if I felt like it, but if it works for me, I don't mess with it."
One product every brown skinned girl should have in her beauty arsenal is sunscreen, and Lizzo had to learn this the hard way:
"I just went to Hawaii and got burned because I didn't use sunscreen. So I've been really adamant about having some kind of SPF in my tinted moisturizer. Right now, I use the Laura Mercier and the NARS ones. I do the tinted moisturizer, and then I do concealer — the Urban Decay Stay Naked."
Other must-have beauty products in Lizzo's bag include the Urban Decay Perversion mascara and Urban Decay brow powder, but according to her, she's most interested in rocking a more natural look these days. Along with ditching false lashes, the 34-year-old singer says she's on a mission to "honor" her skin by rocking a little less makeup:
"I used to do highlighter, but then I stopped on my days off because (a) I've been using the Glow oil, and I think that works better, and (b) lately, when I put highlighter on, it's too much. I'm really into my skin looking naked. I'm trying to honor that my skin looks so good now and rock it."
For details on Lizzo's routine, scroll below!
*Some links are affiliate links. If you make a purchase, xoNecole may earn a small commission.
Sunday Riley C.E.O Glow Vitamin C + Turmeric Face Oil
Sunday Riley Ceramic Slip Cleanser
Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer Broad Spectrum SPF 30
Urban Decay Stay Naked Correcting Concealer
Urban Decay Perversion Mascara
Urban Decay Double Down Brow
Urban Decay All Nighter Long-Lasting Makeup Setting Spray
The Mane Choice Doesn't Get Much "BUTTER" Than This Daily Hair Dressing
Instant Control Edge & Braid Gel
Peter Thomas Roth Cucumber Gel Mask
Featured image by Instagram/@LizzoBeEating.
Originally published on October 5, 2019
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Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
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From Monogamy To Polyamory: 'I'm In An Asexual Poly Marriage With My Husband Of 7 Years'
Have you ever wondered what it's like to be asexual and in an open marriage? Relationship Coach Mikki Bey shared her first-hand experience with us as well as answered some of our burning questions.
Like a lot of people, Mikki met her now husband, Raheem Ali, online. As soon as they met, they instantly fell in love and got engaged on their first date. Just 90 days after they met, the couple tied the knot and have now been married for seven years. Raheem and Mikki aren’t your typical married couple, and despite being married for almost a decade, their marriage is anything but traditional. Mikki and Raheem have what she calls an "asexual polyamorous marriage."
Defining Her Sexuality
It wasn't until last summer that Mikki found the language to define her sexuality. "I didn't have the language for it until last summer," she explained to xoNecole. "Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing.”
Mikki always thought she was broken because she had no interest in sex. Mikki noticed after her friends came to visit and started discussing their sexual fantasies that she realized something was different about her. “At that point, I knew something was definitely different about me since I do not have sexual fantasies at all. It was truly news to me that people are at work thinking about sex! That was not my experience.” This led to Mikki researching asexuality, which she soon realized fit her to a T. “It felt like breathing new air when I was able to call it by name," said Mikki.
"Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing it."
Asexuality refers to people who experience little or no sexual attraction, experience attraction without acting on it sexually, or experience sexual attraction differently based on other factors. Like most things, asexuality falls on a spectrum and encompasses many other identities. It's important to remember, however, that attraction and action are not always synonymous: some asexuals may reject the idea of sexual contact, but others may be sex-neutral and engage in sexual activity.
It's possible that some asexuals will have sex with someone else despite not having a libido or masturbating, but others will have sex with a partner because it brings a sense of connection.
From a Traditional Marriage to Kitchen Table Polyamory
Although Mikki never really had a high sex drive, it wasn’t until after the birth of her son, that she noticed her sex drive took a real nosedive. “I never had a high sex drive, but about a year after my son was born, I realized I had zero desire. My husband has a high sex drive, and I knew that it would not be sustainable to not have sex in our marriage at that time.”
She was determined to find an alternative to divorce and stumbled upon a polyamory conversation on Clubhouse. Upon doing her own research, she brought up the idea to their husband, who was receptive. “It’s so interesting to me that people weigh sex so heavily in relationships when even if you are having a ton of sex, it’s still a very small percentage of the relationship activity," Mikki shared.
They chose polyamory because Mikki still wanted to be married, but she also wanted to make sure that Raheem was getting his individual needs and desires met, even if that meant meeting them with someone else. “I think that we have been programmed to think that our spouses need to be our 'everything.' We do not operate like that. There is no one way that fits all when it comes to relationships, despite what society may try to tell you. Their path to doing this thing called life together may be different from yours, but they found what works for them. We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us,” Mikki explained.
"We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us. We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sex partners to lifetime partners if it should go there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it."
She continued, “We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sexual partners to lifetime partners if it should get there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it. Our dynamic is parallel with kitchen table poly aspirations.”
Kitchen table polyamory (KTP) is a polyamorous relationship in which all participants are on friendly terms enough to share a meal at the kitchen table. Basically, it means you have some form of relationship with your partner’s other partner, whether as a group or individually. A lot of times, KTP relationships are highly personal and rooted in mutual respect, communication, and friendship.
Intimacy in an Asexual Polyamorous Marriage
Mikki says she and her husband, Raheem, still share intimate moments despite being in a polyamorous marriage. “Our intimacy is emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical, although non-sexual. We are intentional about date nights weekly, surprising and delighting each other daily, and most of all, we communicate our needs regularly. In my opinion, our intimacy is top-tier! I give my husband full-body massages, mani-pedis and make sure I am giving him small physical touches/kisses throughout the day. He is also very intentional about showing me his love and affection.”
Raheem and Mikki now use their lives as examples for others. On their website, thepolycouplenextdoor.com, they coach people interested in learning how to be consensually non-monogamous. “We are both relationship coaches. I specialized in emotional regulation, and Raheem specializes in communication and conflict resolution. The same tools we use in our marriage help our clients succeed in polyamory."
Mikki advises people who may be asexual or seeking non-monogamy to communicate their needs openly and to consider seeking sex therapy or intimacy coaching. Building a strong relationship with a non-sexual partner requires both empathy and compassion.
For more of Mikki, follow her on Instagram @getmikkibey. Follow the couple's platform on Instagram @thepolycouplenextdoor.
Featured image by skynesher/Getty Images