"Get enough groceries and water for the next two weeks, get some cash on hand and fill up your gas tank." That's what my dad told me mere days before the pandemic hit America and we went on lockdown with what we now call "The Quarantine". Of course, as a single woman, I was in a state of shock. How was I going to get through this on my own with no family? What were my girlfriends doing? And how would I function as a newly single woman? I had questions, ya'll. But, as a black woman, I knew all too well how to rise to the occasion and SURVIVE so that's all I focused on was surviving and getting through my first pandemic.
From binge-watching movies, eating all of my snacks, and taking care of myself physically because I thought I had "The Rona" - I was strictly in survival mode. Since I was sick, I had to deal with thinking about the virus every single day so per Solange, I "netflix and chilled" it away, ate it away, slept it away and IGNORED it away. It wasn't until the end of April, after I started to feel better mentally and physically, that I began to realize that I needed to do more than survive, I needed to thrive. With this "new normal" of self-quarantining and the endless amount of abysmal news, it was easy for anxiety and depression to kick in while sheltering in place - especially by yourself. But I realized that now was the best time to really tune into myself and give my brain - and my body - a chance to process these emotions and reset.
So, here are 10 things that I've done to pamper and self-care myself back into thriving in this crazier world that we now live in.
1. Do nothing.
In a world where the hustle and bustle of life is applauded, rest is a valuable and sometimes slept-on commodity. Although the grind is real, so is your need to step back and indulge in doing nothing from time to time. The quarantine has been a reminder to slow down, why not surrender to that? Watch TV, sleep, crack open that book you've been meaning to get around to reading. But most importantly, in the immortal words of Whitley Gilbert, "relax, relate and RELEASE!"
2. Read lots of books.
Speaking of reading, something that people in busy seasons admit to often is that they do not have the time to pour into reading as much as they'd like to. In this interim, I've carved out meaningful space and time to do so. Fictional stories are the best to help escape reality, but also consider reading self-improvement books and inspirational books that pour into you positively. Check out our article, "13 Books To Read For A Better Relationship With Yourself" to start.
Photo Credit: Kanobi Pollard
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
3. Pray, mediate or journal.
Whenever you find yourself feeling anxious, overwhelmed or stressed, tune into your higher source to help you stay grounded. Prayer, meditation and journaling are all spiritual practices that can help make you feel more grounded. The clarity that you find as you connect with your inner self and connect with a higher power is invaluable. In addition to that, you will also feel more centered and less stressed as a result...as you deserve!
4. Move your body!
Although we're in between a rock and a hard place when it comes to our feelings about whether or not we should amp up productivity during this time or give into this season of rest, one thing's for sure: Movement is vital. Rest doesn't mean to never get up and show thanks to the able body you've been given. Give gratitude while increasing your overall wellness by moving your body each day. Climb some steps, turn on YouTube and do a workout routine or a yoga practice. Whatever you do, move.
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
5. Make a FaceTime date with...YOUR FRIENDS!
While some states are opening back up, some of us are still declining invites to functions and meet-ups and deciding to self-isolate a bit longer. That being said, it can feel lonely and without in-person energy to pour into you, you can feel less like yourself. There's nothing like a community of women who support you that lifts you up and reminds you of who you are. Take this time to get creative with how you spend time with your friends and girlfriends. Have a much-needed girls' night in TODAY! All you need is Zoom and wine.
6. Take an elaborate shower or flower bath.
"Treat yo' self" is a phrase that is often associated with sitting back and relaxing in a warm bath, and we know why. Not only does it come with its fair share of health benefits, taking a bath provides a sense of renewal as you cleanse away dirt, stress, worry and anxiety. Candles add a soothing mood to your space and smell amazing. If you're up to it, light some candles, put on some Jill Scott, add a bath bomb, fix yourself a glass of wine, and engage in some glorious pampering.
Photo Credit: Kanobi Pollard
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
7. Put your phone down. Seriously.
In this day and age, when so much of what we do is done through our phones, some may find it difficult to take the breaks they need from their devices. However, I implore you to put your phone down every now and then. Not only is it great for your mental health to lessen your preoccupation tied to your phone, but you also effectively connect to yourself more when you disconnect from the world by unplugging. In short, put the phone down, sis.
8. Develop a green thumb and focus on taking care of something else.
Many black women are taking after our ancestors and developing a green thumb during this time. Caring for plants allow you to focus on the health and growth of a living thing outside of yourself while beautifying your space. Some plants can also improve air quality and humidity levels in your place (fights off the Rona), reduces stress (because of the Rona), and make people calmer and happier (in spite of the Rona). It also reduces workplace negativity and helps relieve symptoms of discomfort and minor ailments. If you want to know what plants you can get started with, check out our article, "These Easy To Care For Plants Can Thrive With Little To No Sunlight".
Photo Credit: Kanobi Pollard
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
Through it all, everyone needs to take care of themselves mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Period. Our world before this didn't prioritize self-care in a real way, it was a mere hashtag for many, including myself. However, because I'm a natural introvert, I learned at a young age that my very own personal love language IS pampering myself, and tuning into my needs because that is vital to my overall wellbeing. Have I always succeeded in doing so? Absolutely not but before this, I always tried to make it a priority.
Photo Credit: Kanobi Pollard
Annisa LiMara/xoNecole
But in a time that has forced us to really sit with ourselves (poor, poor extroverts), this is the perfect time to really love on ourselves and appreciate just being. Self-care isn't always pretty nor as simple as lighting some candles and getting a manicure, it's really about tending to whatever part of you that needs some extra TLC at that time.
This pandemic has really shown us that we have a plethora of needs that we must tend to and now have the time to do so. So do it.
Do you have a beauty, wellness or self-care find that you've tried recently and want to share your experience? Join the xoTribe members community to connect with other beauty lovers and share your wins with the tribe.
Featured image courtesy of Annisa LiMara/Kanobi Pollard
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For Us, By Us: How HBCU Alumni Are Building Legacies Through Entrepreneurship
Homecoming season is here, and alumni are returning to the yard to celebrate with their friends and family at the historically Black colleges and universities (HBCUs) that have changed their lives forever.
No matter where their life journeys have taken them, for HBCU students from near and far, returning to where it all started can invoke feelings of nostalgia, appreciation for the past, and inspiration for the future.
The seeds for these entrepreneurs were planted during their time as students at schools like Spelman, North Carolina A&T, and more, which is why xoNecole caught up with Look Good Live Well’s Ariane Turner, HBCU Buzz’s Luke Lawal and Morehouse Senior Director of Marketing and Comms and Press Secretary Jasmine Gurley to highlight the role their HBCU roots play in their work as entrepreneurs, the legacy they aim to leave behind through the work that they do, and more as a part of Hyundai’s Best In Class initiative.
On Honoring HBCU Roots To Create Something That Is For Us, By Us
Ariane Turner
Courtesy
When Ariane Turner launched Look Good, Live Well, she created it with Black and brown people in mind, especially those with sensitive skin more prone to dryness and skin conditions like acne and eczema.
The Florida A&M University graduate launched her business to create something that addressed topical skin care needs and was intentional about its approach without negative terminology.
Turner shared that it is important to steer clear of language often adopted by more prominent brands, such as “banishing breakouts” or “correcting the skin,” because, in reality, Turner says there is nothing wrong with the way that our skin and bodies react to various life changes.
“I think what I have taken with me regarding my HBCU experience and translated to my entrepreneurial experience is the importance of not just networking,” Turner, the founder and CEO of Look Good, Live Well, tellls xoNecole.
“We hear that in business all the time, your network is your net worth, but family, there’s a thing at FAMU that we call FAMU-lee instead of family, and it’s very much a thing. What that taught me is the importance of not just making relationships and not just making that connection, but truly working on deepening them, and so being intentional about connecting with people initially, but staying connected and building and deepening those relationships, and that has served me tremendously in business, whether it’s being able to reach back to other classmates who I went to school with, or just networking in general.”
She adds, “I don’t come from a business background. As soon as I finished school, I continued with my entrepreneurial journey, and so there’s a lot of that traditional business act and the networking, those soft skills that I just don’t have, but I will say that just understanding how to leverage and network community and to build intentional relationships is something that has taken me far and I definitely got those roots while attending FAMU.”
On Solving A Very Specific Need For The Community
Luke Lawal Jr.
Courtesy
When Luke Lawal Jr. launched HBCU Buzz, his main focus was to represent his community, using the platform to lift as they climbed by creating an outlet dedicated to celebrating the achievements and positive news affecting the 107 historically HBCUs nationwide.
By spotlighting the wonderful things that come from the HBCU community and coupling it with what he learned during his time at Bowie State University, Lawal used that knowledge to propel himself as an entrepreneur while also providing his people with accurate representation across the internet.
“The specific problem in 2011 when I started HBCU Buzz was more so around the fact that mainstream media always depict HBCUs as negative,” Lawal says. “You would only see HBCUs in the mainstream media when someone died, or the university president or someone was stepping down. It was always bad news, but they never shed light on all the wonderful things from our community."
So, I started HBCU Buzz to ensure the world saw the good things that come from our space. And they knew that HBCUs grew some of the brightest people in the world, and just trying to figure out ways to make sure our platform was a pedestal for all the students that come through our institutions.”
“The biggest goal is to continue to solve problems, continue to create brands that solve the problems of our communities, and make sure that our products, our brands, our companies, and institutions are of value and they’re helping our community,” he continues. “That they’re solving problems that propel our space forward.”
On How Being An HBCU Alum Impacts The Way One Shows Up In The World
Jasmine Gurley
Courtesy
Jasmine Gurley is a proud North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University alum. She is even more delighted with her current role, which enables her to give back to current HBCU students as the Senior Director of Brand Marketing and Communications and official press secretary at Morehouse College.
“It was a formative experience where I really was able to come into my own and say yes to all the opportunities that were presented to me, and because of that, it’s been able to open the doors later in life too,” says Gurley of her experience at North Carolina A&T. “One thing I love about many HBCUs is that we are required to learn way more about African American history than you do in your typical K through 12 or even at the higher ed level."
She adds, “It allowed us to have a better understanding of where we came from, and so for me, because I’m a storyteller, I’m a history person, I’m very sensitive to life in general, being able to listen to the stories and the trials that our ancestors overcame, put the battery pack in my back to say, ‘Oh nothing can stop me. Absolutely nothing can stop me. I know where I came from, so I can overcome something and try anything. And I have an obligation to be my ancestors’ wildest dreams. Simultaneously, I also have a responsibility to help others realize that greatness.
Gurley does not take her position at an HBCU, now as a leader, lightly.
“People think I’m joking when I say I’m living the dream, but I really am,” she notes. “So I wake up every day and know that the work that I do matters, no matter how hard it might be, how frustrating it may be, and challenging it. I know the ripple effect of my work, my team, and what this institution does also matter. The trajectory of Black male experiences, community, history, and then just American advancement just in general.”
On the other hand, through her business, Sankofa Public Relations, Gurley is also on a mission to uplift brands in their quest to help their respective communities. Since its inception in 2017, Sankofa PR has been on a mission to “reach back and reclaim local, national, and global communities by helping those actively working to move” various areas of the world, focusing on pushing things forward for the better.
“Through Sankofa, we’ve worked with all different types of organizational brands and individuals in several different industries, but I would think of them as mission-based,” says Gurley.
“So with that, it’s an opportunity to help people who are trying to do good in the world, and they are passionate about what they’re doing. They just need help with marketing issues, storytelling, and branding, and that’s when my expertise can come into play. Help them get to that moment where they can tell their story through me or another platform, and that’s been super fulfilling.”
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Feature image courtesy
The Best Celebrity Halloween Costumes Of 2024 So Far
Every year, the best celebrity Halloween costumes downplay the spooky aspect of the season and turn up the creative drip with throwback homages to pop culture moments. This year is no different, with us scrolling through their uploads of THE Halloween photoshoot pics, nodding our heads in collective unison at the way their homages and transformations prove why Black culture is the blueprint in every sense.
Who could forget when Beyoncé gave us her flawless Lil’ Kim looks that were so on point, even the Queen Bee herself gave her props? Or the time Ciara and Russell Wilson shut it down as Beyoncé and Jay-Z from the “Apeshit” video? And we can’t talk about Halloween greatness without mentioning when Saweetie gave us her iconic take on the X-Men character Mystique—sis ate and she left no crumbs!
This year, our faves are back and still bringing all that energy. So, let’s get into the most memorable celebrity costumes of Halloween 2024...so far.
1.Ciara as Naomi Campbell
"Do the Naomi Campbell walk, the Naomi Campbell walk." Ciara undoubtedly understood the assignment. One thing about Cici is she can nail a tribute, chile. We have no notes!
2.Lizzo as Lizzo, the weight-loss drug from 'South Park'
Show us you don't take yourself too seriously by not taking yourself too seriously. Lizzo did exactly that when she popped out on the Halloween scene dressed as the Ozempic-parody drug featured in a South Park special.
3.Chloe Bailey as Jessica Rabbit
@chloebaileywashere i present to you… Jessica Rabbit 💋
Chloe Bailey was nothing short of sultry as she channeled the infamous Who Framed Roger Rabbit animated character Jessica Rabbit. The costume is a common one for Halloween but we can't think of an artist that embodies this energy more than the curves-for-days "Body Do" songstress.
4.Keke Palmer and family as Milli Vanilli
Name a more iconic duo, we'll wait. Keke Palmer and her family decided to pay homage this Halloween to German duo Milli Vanilli.
5.Keke Palmer as Cersei Lannister from 'Games of Thrones'
For her second costume, Keke Palmer tapped her son to get in on the Halloween fun in her turn as Games of Thrones' Cersei Lannister. "I, Cersei Lannister, introduce YOU to the heir of the throne!" she captioned a set of photos.
6.Tyla as Sharon Stone in 'The Flintstones'
@tyla_ The finest flinstone @Halle Berry
In a turn that couldn't have been executed any more perfectly, singer Tyla decided to take it back to the Mesozoic Era with her costume as Sharon Stone, originally played by Halle Berry in the 1994 movie, The Flintstones.
7.Halle Berry as a witch
Speaking of Halle Berry, the actress traded her Storm and Catwoman garb to portray a classic witch this Halloween.
8.China Anne McClain as 'Mrs.' Freddy Kreuger
Actress China Anne McClain showed her hand and then some in her gender-swapping take of the fictional Wes Craven character Freddy Kreuger. She also sported another costume as Lara Croft from the Tomb Raider franchise.
9.Ice Spice as Leeloo from 'The Fifth Element'
Ice Spice switched up her signature style while still embracing a similar color shared by The Fifth Element character she dressed up as for Halloween, Leelo. Spot on!
10.Saweetie as the Joker
Saweetie gave us a Halloween costume classic in her take on Heath Ledger's Joker featured in Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight.
11.Ciara as GloRilla
By now, we've all seen the clip circulating of host Speedy Morman's reaction to rapper GloRilla's Memphis accent. In her second Halloween costume, Ciara recreated the viral moment, embodying Glo's infectious energy and we live.
12.North West as Tyler, the Creator
@kimandnorth running out of time to Halloween
Kanye's mini-me North West decided to pay homage to two artists for Halloween, the first being Tyler, the Creator, and his "Running Out of Time" look where he donned a blonde bob and a blue suit. North also wore a second costume as R&B singer H.E.R., a tribute to her surprise appearance in this year's Super Bowl with Usher.
13.Sevyn Streeter as Anck-su-namun from 'The Mummy'
Sevyn Streeter popped out as Anck-su-namun from the 90s classic, The Mummy. All we gotta say is, the body is tea.
14.That Chick Angel & Marcus Tanksley as Common & His Girlfriends
Talk about a rich dating history, Common is someone who has had a plethora of high-profile relationships over the years and That Chick Angel chose to pay homage to his track record by hilariously transforming into all of his exes, from Tiffany Haddish to Erykah Badu.
15.Princeton Perez as Michael Jackson and Loren Sharice as Naomi Campbell
@princetonperez Happy Halloween ;) #michaeljackson #naomicampbell #keepitinthecloset #musicvideo 🩶 @LorenSharice
What would a 'best Halloween costumes' list be without a tribute to the King of Pop? Princeton Perez and Loren Sharice recreated the iconic "In the Closet" music video from Michael Jackson as Michael and Naomi Campbell respectively.
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Featured image by James Devaney/GC Images