

Stress is a common part of living, especially when it comes to work. For women, the impact can be felt even more due to workplace issues including unequal pay, gender discrimination, and race-related aggressions. In fact, research shows that professional women experience more stress than men, with a 46% prevalence for those employed full-time (versus 42% for men).
Many toxic factors in the workplace are part of systemic problems that require address and resolution. On the other hand, some stressors are simply part of the job and are a normal occurrence, especially for certain occupations. Thus, finding ways to manage stress is super-important for all the women who are bossing up, who love what they do, and who want to continue thriving in their careers. There are meetings to lead, deals to close, and people to serve.
For those days when having a meltdown and saying 'To hell with this job,' is not an option, here are five quick steps you can take to keep it together when work is trying your nerves and pushing you to the limit:
1. Get into breathwork.
Practicing methods like breathing retention can do wonders for coping with stress. (And this goes beyond just taking a few deep breaths). Sitting for a 10- to 15-minute session of deliberate action to control your breathing, center your thoughts and relax your jaw, shoulder, and back, has been found to help release feelings of stress and take control of your body.
Stress can trigger physical and mental reactions like decreases in energy, diarrhea or constipation, forgetfulness, and headaches, and nobody has time for that when trying to ace a presentation or practice healthy management habits. You can take a quick break, right in your office, find a quiet spot near your job, or even use your car for that impromptu breathwork session, allowing time and space for refreshing your mind, body, and spirit.
2. Journal about your stress triggers.
Yes, while at work. Writing down exactly what's triggering you or simply getting your thoughts out of your head can provide just the relief you need to get to the end of the day without going off of somebody or mentally detaching yourself. You surely don't want to do this on your company-owned computer, nor do you want to have sticky notes thrown around your office with your personal thoughts and triggers listed on them, but you can definitely use that Notes or journal app on your phone to type out a few thoughts or keep a mini book in your purse or car for purging.
With "expressive writing intervention," (i.e. journaling), you can improve your mood and see long-term positive results related to anxiety and stress. Don't know where to start or find journaling overwhelming? Try prompts that will help guide you in formulating your thoughts, facilitating calm, and redirecting your focus.
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3. Take a fitness break.
Doing some sort of physical activity can also be the perfect release you need for shaking off stress during your work day. If you can take a whole 30-minute break (in addition to your usual lunch break, which you should be taking regardless of your work schedule or responsibilities), use the time for some HIIT, boxing, yoga, running, or walking. For options that are a bit more low-key or cubicle-friendly, try low-impact exercises such as seated jacks or side skaters or movements like tricep stretches that can relieve back and neck pain associated with stress.
Find a great podcast, audiobook, or playlist to listen to while doing this, put a timer on, and allow yourself some time for activity that will increase endorphins (which are behind positive emotions and feelings).
4. Incorporate play into your day.
If you're not into actual workouts in the middle of a work day, try something fun that gets you away from your desk and into some sort of activity that makes your heart sing and allows you to, again, refocus your efforts in order to manage stress. A dance break, playing a game outdoors (i.e. solo basketball, soccer, or tennis), or incorporating fun games in your office decor (like a mini golf game or adult hopscotch).
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5. Spark a discussion with your trusted mentor, HR professional, team, or colleague in a solutions-focused way.
While confiding in a coworker, HR professional, or manager can have its pros and cons and can seem intimidating, talking about what's stressing you out in a way that prioritizes solutions and open dialogue can help you find solutions or at least a way to cope. This is most fitting when the source of stress involves the completion of a project, troubleshooting how to tackle a major work-related issue, addressing a difficult interaction with a team member, learning a new system or skill, or breaking through communication barriers.
When appropriate (and within your company's rules about fraternizing, hours, and interactions), invite a mentor or colleague to coffee, lunch, or dinner. If you're a manager, schedule a meeting with your team or host one-on-ones to focus not on venting, disciplining, or complaining, but on personal engagement. It's a good idea to ask open-ended questions like "How would you approach this issue?" "How can we make a process more efficient?" "What resources do we need to work smart, not hard?" versus "This is stressing me out," "Quiet Quitter Kelly is getting on my nerves" or "You're not doing your part."
Oftentimes, there's a way to eliminate stress related to certain aspects of a job simply by having honest and inclusive conversations, acting on recommendations, shifting processes, tracking results, and recognizing the ways in which workplace practices, habits, and culture might be adding unnecessary stress and confusion to everyday workday tasks.
Trying these five steps can ensure you are your best self, you're able to empower others, and that you can sustain a long and healthy career full of fulfillment and legacy.
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Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
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Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Raven-Symoné & Her Wife Miranda Get Real About Intimacy & Why They Sleep In Separate Bedrooms
Raven-Symoné and her wife Miranda Pearman-Maday are proof that doing marriage your way is the only way.
In a recent solo episode of their podcast Tea Time w/ Raven & Miranda, the couple revealed that they've started to share separate bedrooms, and no, it's not because they're having problems. In fact, the decision has actually brought them closer. "Let's normalize it," Miranda said of sleeping in separate bedrooms, calling it a move that improved their relationship and their marriage for the better.
"We really function in better in separate spaces, especially when it comes to sleep," she explained on the podcast. "And I was like, 'We should have separate bedrooms.' And then we can decorate our bedrooms as we want, number one, which is great because you had a different vibe, so we both wanted to have different style of bedrooms. Now we get to have that. And we aren't fucking up each other's sleep schedules. Primarily, you're not fucking mine up, which is getting up at 2 a.m., 4 a.m. Raven, babes, you love to sleep in the reverse orientation."
She wasn't exaggerating either. Raven admitted that she has always had an issue with sleeping in normal orientation, dating back to her childhood. "When I was younger, I've always had a problem with staying in one orientation when I slept. My mom said that she would not like to sleep with me. And I would kick people when I sleep with them. And so I remember when we got engaged. We slept in my old house and you told me that when you woke up, my ass was in your face because I had turned my body around."
"One night, you literally flipped. I thought you were awake because it was so, it was so violent. Like you were sleeping on your side away from me. You flip yourself up and over, you like kinda sit up, and you had no clue where you were because you put your entire ass on my face. Both cheeks were suffocating me. Boom, it was impact," Miranda recalls. "And I was like, this is, this is going to be a challenge."
Suffice it to say, the incident became an issue. One that they needed to find a solution for. "So now," Raven said, "we've decided I'm sleeping in a separate room from you." The compromise? Whenever they need each other, "We text," Miranda added.
Despite where your mind might go when you hear "separate bedrooms" in someone's relationship, the pair assured that the move has helped their intimacy more than it's hindered it. "I will say it has upped my [feels] for you," Raven told Miranda. "There's a little bit of, I believe, in absence makes the heart grow fonder. We work together, we live together, we eat together, we cook together, we drive together. It's like, I'm going to have a little time to myself, and I think that it's actually helping."
Even with the perks of better sleep and better intimacy that have come with their decision to separate their marital bed, Miranda admitted that if someone had suggested to her separate bedrooms a year ago, she would've panicked.
Together since 2015 and married since 2020, Miranda revealed that the would-be solution initially had her questioning, "Does this mean divorce?" But she chalked that up to programming. "I was very much from a space where I was taking my information from heterosexual [relationships], [and feeling like] this is the best way," she said.
Raven also took the conversation deeper, pointing out how many people conflate sex with love, especially when it comes to intimacy. "I also think if you are basing your entire relationship on sex, then you're not really understanding what intimacy is. You're not understanding what deep love is because you can have a deep, loving, intimate relationship with someone and not have sex. Sex is like a cherry on top. You know what I mean? That's like a oooh, it's built up so much I got to release."
She continued, "I don't think sex defines a relationship. I think sex is lustful. And I think that a deep marriage and a deep intimate relationship is where I can literally be just looking at you, and I can be like... And you know what that means."
"And I know what that means," Miranda echoed.
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