

Recently, one of my friends expressed disappointment in her full-time employer for not addressing the current state of affairs with its employees. She works in healthcare and her employer is simply operating business as usual. Social distancing is the only priority while social justice is a mere option. As a Black employee, it's not a good feeling.
Or a good sign.
What a company's complete silence toward protests against police brutality or our fight for civil rights, equality and basic respect as human beings shows us is that "they don't care about you or your advancement," says Lauren Wesley Wilson of ColorComm.
Wilson, founder and CEO of the women's empowerment corporation ColorComm, recently led a conversation on corporate activism and how it pertains to company culture as well as today's climate. To Wilson, corporate activism means:
To strategically advocate for equality inside corporations to ensure underrepresented employees have the same opportunity for advancement as their white counterparts.
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This support can come in a variety of diversity and inclusion forms such as:
- Hiring a chief diversity officer;
- Partnering with community-based organizations;
- Recruiting at historically black colleges and universities; or
- Implementing human resource guidelines for inclusion.
But the programs are essentially meaningless if persons of color make up less than 30% of senior leadership, Wilson says. Who's really going to enforce them? And a company's words can come across as empty with no action to back them up.
Over the past week, my IG timeline alone has been inundated with a steady stream of company commitments to Black Lives Matter referencing "responsibility" and "rising up against racial injustice." We also see companies publicly pledging millions of dollars to various community organizations. And more recently, we see companies racing to produce CVS-style receipts detailing the number of Black executives, staff and board members on their teams for the Pull Up or Shut Up campaign. Some of those figures make me wonder if those companies should've chosen to remain mute like the hospital where my friend works.
One of y'all fave brands can't participate in the #pulluporshutup challenge because their team is all white....has always been....they only use black faces to sell....#butyallaintreadyforthatconvo
— Tina (@thefancyfaced) June 4, 2020
Wilson says every company doesn't need to make a public statement, though, especially if that company isn't internally representative of what they're proclaiming. She's referring to establishments that vow to stand behind the cause or donate money yet continuously lay off persons of color en masse during the pandemic. Or companies that slowly promote us to C-suite and management roles or pay us far less than our white peers in salary, raises and bonus.
Still Wilson says leadership absolutely needs to address the current state of affairs to their employees – at least show us some compassion or concern – and senior management also needs to create a plan for internal changes, especially if we're missing from the organization charts on the company's "About Us" web pages.
Some employers will need a push to make any real change. Others will need a clue. Here's what you can do to help:
Outright ask your senior management their plans to encourage diversity and inclusion in the workplace.
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This isn't a question that's outside or above our pay grades. We can ask even if we don't work in human resources. We also can't assume there's a program already in place and if there is, the existing plan may not even work. In fact, Wilson says that programs such as unconscious bias training, which is designed to raise awareness of microaggressions in the workplace, are usually the worst when it comes to effectiveness.
Additionally, we should ask what specific programs are in place to eradicate racial biases in hiring and promoting. And don't be afraid to find out how long employees who look like us remain in a single position, how far we can climb up the ladder and how long we stay with the company.
Discreetly form your own team of allies.
Recruit your sisters for solidarity but also gather a small but diverse group of coworkers who will fully champion your ideas for change when the time comes to formally present them. In other words, we'll need to round up Karen's more liberal cousins as our backup. I know, it sucks but don't misunderstand this as seeking their validation. They're merely a voice, or more like an echo. Just be sure you're always the one spearheading this (secret) task force.
Ask senior management how their donated funds are being used by receiving organizations.
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Find out if your company's donation to activist groups and other nonprofits is going towards education or funding for community initiatives and which ones. Also inquire whether that money would've been of better use in-house. The key is to determine if those donated dollars are, as Wilson puts it, a change opportunity or a PR opportunity.
Unfortunately, there will be instances where corporate activism is only a buzzword. Despite the conversations, social media posts and charitable contributions, some of us still won't get that much-deserved promotion or pay increase at our current jobs. And we won't get a simple email acknowledging the horrors that continuously affect our lives and livelihoods every single day. At that point it's time for my colleague and anyone else in her predicament, to seek new employment. Invest your time and talent in an organization that invests in you and shows you that our Black Lives truly do Matter.
Need more career talk like this in your life? Join the xoTribe members community to connect, vibe and share your wins with the tribe.
Featured image by Shutterstock
I write about lifestyle and women's health and wellness. When I'm not in front of a computer screen crafting stories, I'm in a kitchen crafting cocktails. Follow me on the 'gram @teronda.
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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A Black-Owned Mobile Spa Turned My Home Into A Luxury Retreat—Here’s My Experience
There’s nothing quite like a spa day, but what’s even better is when you can enjoy one right at home. I recently had my first at-home spa day with The Party Spa, a Black-owned mobile spa founded by Asher Wilkins.
Asher’s team of 25 professionals offers a wide range of services, including massages, facials, body scrubs, and more. Asher, a licensed massage therapist, stumbled upon a unique opportunity to combine massage services with the vibrant nightlife scene.
The Party Spa Team
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"I noticed there was a need in the New York City night life, especially with the after work parties and I felt that I had that answer in regards to bringing what I did, because I'm a licensed massage therapist," he tells xoNecole. "So how could I incorporate this into what I like to do, which was socialize and network, and party.
"I went to some club owners and some promoters, and I told them about the idea. I said, let's include the chair massage along with what you have going on and it worked." At that time, the clientele was primarily women who needed a massage after a long night of dancing, especially in heels.
London getting a massage from Asher
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The Party Spa, having expanded its services to cater to a diverse clientele, including business professionals and celebrities like Mary J. Blige, has even graced music tours like the I Love the 90s tour. Their extensive travel across the country led them to my doorstep, where I eagerly awaited my pampering session.
Asher and Miss Jazz arrived at my home and began infusing the space with a relaxing spa vibe. They set up an essential oil diffuser and provided me with a cozy white robe for a comfortable change. While I had the option to choose my preferred music, I opted for the soothing melodies of traditional spa music.
Asher skillfully administered my massage, applying medium to deep pressure that perfectly suited my preferences. He effectively worked out the lingering pain in my lower back and hips, leaving me feeling rejuvenated and pampered. The delightful aroma of the massage oils intensified as he continued rubbing me down, enhancing the overall sensory experience.
London receiving a facial from Miss Jazz.
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Once Asher finished, it was time for my facial. Facials are rare for me, so this was a delightful treat. Miss Jazz began with a facial massage, a new experience for me that I thoroughly enjoyed.
It felt like a continuation of the body massage I had just received. From there, she applied various products to my face, including a scrub, cleanser, vitamin C serum, and cream. She also gave me a honey and sugar lip scrub, which I desperately needed.
The result was radiant, smooth skin. The Party Spa transformed my first at-home spa experience into a blissful one. I found myself in a tranquil state of mind and relaxed the rest of the day.
The Party Spa is expanding its footprint by launching a podcast, Confessions of a Celebrity Massage Therapist, and working with non-profits to donate beauty and wellness services to survivors of sex trafficking and abuse. To learn more, visit their website thepartyspa.com, or follow them on Instagram @thepartyspa.
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