“I never thought of myself as no TV personality chile, like never,” Nivea admits to xoNecole. “But watching the show back, I’ve literally catching myself laughing, falling out, screaming, and laughing at myself. So with that being said is that I’m always so uncontrollably myself like it could be shocking, I guess even for me. But I’m glad I made people laugh, or they could relate to me because I was definitely being myself.”
*Spoiler alert*
While the dating series was a unique experience for all the ladies involved, Nivea found herself in quite a conundrum throughout most of the show. Unlike Tamar and Evelyn, who were both able to narrow down their options to one guy by the finale, the “Laundromat” singer had two guys she couldn’t quite shake, Ty and Mack. The difficulty of choosing between the two men was apparent as Nivea would often say on the show how both of them appealed to different sides of her. The mom of four tells me that she was really “torn between the two all the way up until the end.”
But in the finale, she made the ultimate decision of choosing herself.
“I’m a very instinctual being, and I trusted honey,” she explains. “I’m so into my intuition, and I really go with [my] gut feelings, and I kept saying I’ll know since it took up to the last dang on day anyway. I said okay, when I’m making this final decision, I’ll feel where my heart is pulling me, what my mind is saying, and everything was saying, nah, neither one was the one.”
She continues, “You know when you know. As I’ve had not-so-great relationships, I’ve had good, healthy ones as well, so I know what that exchange at least should feel like. The same way as you know when something don’t feel right, so I had to say deuces to both of them. And Mack and Ty are so cool, though. I had two cool dudes, I must say.”
"I said okay, when I’m making this final decision, I’ll feel where my heart is pulling me, what my mind is saying, and everything was saying, nah, neither one was the one.”
Nivea is a mother to four children. She shares three children with her ex-husband, singer/ producer The-Dream, and one with rapper Lil Wayne. While those relationships didn’t work out, the “Okay” artist is determined to find her person and credits her self-love journey in helping her weed out those who aren’t worthy of her love. Being on Queens Court complemented her personal journey as she felt like the process was a form of “therapy” for her.
She explains how talking with the guys, the hosts of the series, Holly Robinson Peete and Rodney Peete, and Evelyn and Tamar, helped her see things about herself that she needed to change such as setting boundaries and no longer always putting others’ needs in front of her own.
“Tamar and Evelyn showed me that it’s nothing wrong with being like, ‘I'm not putting up with that shit.’ Like, I don’t have to take this,” she says. “They are very much set in knowing of what they deserve, and anybody that's not honoring that of what they want in their lives then they stop it at the door.
“I’m the 200th chancer, you know what I mean, and now it’s like from not just in every way. I’m not allowing a lot that I would use to in the past. Like uh, uh, stop that bullshit at the door before it festers like I'm used to doing.” While her self-love journey is ongoing, she can now take what she has learned so far and apply it to her dating life. The beloved singer got emotional as she began sharing the type of man she wants in her future.
Nivea
Photo courtesy of Nivea
“I’m looking for somebody who mirrors me now. That mirroring in the past, my God, and now I’m able to say dang, I did do that. I was a part of that. Now that I love who I’m becoming, I want that mirrored. I’m okay with what’s coming next because I know I’m a better me,” she says as she becomes overwhelmed with emotion.
“I know this time around it will be because, I hate to say it, I've been forced to do self-work and just constantly being let down and disappointed and heartbroken. It forces you to say, like seriously what am I doing wrong? And I don’t like that word wrong because, a lot things are yin and yang, and more left and right than right and wrong.
"Now that I love who I’m becoming, I want that mirrored. I’m okay with what’s coming next because I know I’m a better me.”
She continues, “I’m just ready for the next season, I know that my next forever person is going to be a support system for me. They will be spiritual, they will be educated in many ways. I can feel it. It’s gonna be really powerful and I can’t wait chile. I’m glad I’m finally ready and I can trust myself again.”
Nivea just released her new song “Killa” and will be releasing the music video soon. She is also working on her new album.
Follow Nivea on Instagram @thisisnivea.
Feature image courtesy of Nivea
