

Typically, this is the time of year when we hear the term "immune system" come up quite a bit. That's because, as the temperatures start to drop and the weather becomes more inclement as it relates to harsh winds, sleet and snow, it can start to take a toll on our health. Not to mention the fact that flu season (which usually runs between October thru April) is on the horizon as well.
Yet what actually does our immunity consist of? Well, white blood cells, antibodies, our lymphatic system, spleen, thymus and bone marrow all play a direct role in fighting off germs, viruses, bacteria and anything else that could cause us to catch an infection or get really sick. That's why, it's imperative that we never take our immune system for granted; that we do all that we can to keep it strong and healthy, so that it can combat anything that may try and come our way this fall and winter season. Are you ready to learn 10 relatively easy ways to do just that?
1. Up Your Vitamin C Intake
Let's start with something that actually might be pretty obvious to most of y'all. The reason why I say that is because, probably ever since you were a little girl, your mama (or grandma or auntie) talked about how Vitamin C helps to fight colds. And she would be right.
Something that's interesting about this particular vitamin is your body is unable to produce it; this means that you need to either take it in supplement form or via your diet. It's important that you not skip out on getting Vitamin C into your system because it's an antioxidant that helps to build up your body's defenses, manages your blood pressure, helps to keep your iron levels balanced and, it also helps to increase your white blood cells so that your body is better equipped to fight off infections.
So, how much Vitamin C do you need? Around 90 mg a day is cool. If you feel a cold coming on, you can consume as much as 1,000-2,000 mg before side effects like diarrhea, nausea and abdominal cramping set in. However, it should go on record that close-to-overdosing on Vitamin C, thinking that it will help you, doesn't really do much good. For one thing, you will urinate out what your system doesn't need and, it's not a vitamin that prevents the onset of a cold so much as it speeds up the recovery process once you already have one. As far as the foods that are high in Vitamin C—citrus fruits, broccoli, red and green peppers, tomatoes, white and sweet potatoes, berries and kale and spinach are just some that can give your body a healthy dose of this must-have nutrient.
2. Consume Whole Plant Foods
If you want your immune system to remain uncompromised, you definitely need antioxidants; ones that are able to keep harmful pathogens (bacterium and viruses that trigger disease) at bay while also fighting off free radicals (which damage cells and even DNA) in the process. Something that is loaded with the antioxidants that you need in order to combat both of these health-related issues are whole plant foods. They're the kinds of fruits and vegetables that are considered "whole" because they include very minimal processing. While whole plant eating shouldn't be confused with veganism or vegetarianism, individuals who follow a whole plant diet, typically eat less meat in comparison to their produce intake.
By the way, if you especially make sure to eat fruits and veggies that are high in fiber, that can help to remove toxins out of your system while also providing your gut (which is where 80 percent of your immune system resides) with good bacteria. If eating more whole plant foods is what you're interested in doing, click here for a list of fruits and veggies that are in season during the fall and wintertime.
3. Lay Off of Grain-Based Foods
While inflammation is a topic that deserves its own article, the short version is, it's a natural defense to an injury or illness. While a short-term amount of inflammation is OK, if your body remains in a high state of alert where inflammation-related chemicals continue to flow throughout your system, that can negatively impact your organs and tissues. And guess what can actually trigger an inflammatory response in your body? Grain-based foods. What exactly fits into this category? Bread, pasta, cereal, tortillas and even grits. Listen, I'm not saying you can't eat these things. All I'm saying is if you do and you start to feel a little less than great, cutting back on those types of things could prove to be beneficial. Try it and see.
4. Cook with More Garlic
As far as natural remedies to fight off illnesses go, I'm not sure if there are too many things that top garlic. Since it's a plant that's a part of the Allium (onion) family, this means that garlic has its fair share of sulfur (33 sulfur compounds, to be exact); this is relevant because sulfur is proven to increase your body's resistance to viruses. Garlic is also high in the kind of antioxidants that reduce the amount of oxidative stress that your body produces. It also helps to detoxify heavy metals out of your system, lower your cholesterol levels and cut the time you're sitting with a cold or the flu by as much as 61 percent! Impressive indeed.
5. Drink Some Echinacea Tea
The fall and winter seasons are definitely the time of year when a warm cup of tea (with honey) sounds pretty amazing. If you're trying to figure out which tea you should add to your collection, how about some echinacea? It's actually the kind of tea that is popular for both preventing and shortening the lifespan of a common cold. Plus, it's something that can help to increase the production of your white blood cells so that you are able to ward off infections before they set into your system. Just keep in mind that if you're someone who has an allergic reaction to any flower in the daisy family (ragweed, chrysanthemums, etc.), you might want to pass on this particular tip. Echinacea is a flowering plant that is a part of that family too.
6. Take Some Krill Oil
If you're not familiar with what krill oil is, it's basically an oil that comes from animals like lobsters, crabs and krill (so, if you're allergic to shellfish, you should take a pass on this particular suggestion as well). It's an oil that is gaining traction in popularity because it's loaded with omega-3 fatty acids; in fact, it has a reputation for being more effective than fish oil (which is pretty bomb). The reason why it's a great way to boost your immunity is because krill oil fights bodily inflammation (which again, can lead to illness). As a bonus, krill oil is known to relieve PMS symptoms and soothe aching joints too. If this is something that you'd be interested in trying, click here to read a list of the best brands that are currently on the market.
7. Keep Some Clove Oil on Tap Too
Listen, if you've got a toothache, something that will nip it in the bud is clove oil. I mean, I have never encountered something that will significantly reduce oral pain like it can. OK, but this is about building up your immune system, so let me stay focused. Because cloves contain very potent antibacterial, antiviral, antimicrobial and antifungal properties, it's hailed as being an ultimate natural antiseptic. Whether you opt to put a couple of drops of the oil into your favorite tea to relieve nausea; mix it with a carrier oil like coconut or grapeseed, put it on a cotton ball and rub it on your forehead to open up your blood vessels and bring headache relief; you rub it on chest to break up congestion, or you cook with cloves to boost your immune system, cloves can bring immediate relief to cold-related symptoms in a way that few other all-natural remedies can. If you'd like to incorporate it more into your diet, apple butter, Blueberry Gluhwein (which is basically a fancy mulled wine) or Moroccan-Spiced Carrot Hummus are some creatively delicious DIY ways to get cloves into your system if they're not something that you're used to consuming on the regular.
8. Walk Outdoors
As it gets colder outside, sometimes we want to spend less time outdoors. But actually, it's during cold and flu season that you should be out more than usual. Just because the temperature may be lower, that doesn't make the sun any less effective and Vitamin D is something that we are able to get directly from sunlight. The more Vitamin D you have in your system, the better you'll be at fighting off viral infections including the flu and even COVID-19. In fact, many people who are susceptible to illness are oftentimes lower in Vitamin D than they should be.
And what about the days when it's simply too chilly to step out? No problem. Open up our window treatments. The natural light can get into your house—and body—that way too. What about Vitamin D supplements? You can certainly take those, but it tends to be more effective (on the potency tip) to get your Vitamin D via Mother Nature. (By the way, foods that are high in Vitamin D include cheese, egg yolks, salmon, tuna and mushrooms.)
9. Have Sex
If you follow my byline enough on this platform, you know that I'm gonna shout-out sex, just as much as I possibly can (check out "10 Things Couples Who (Consistently) Have Great Sex Do", "12 Absolutely Bomb Sex Techniques To Try Tonight" and "How About Having A 'Mindful Orgasm' Tonight?", for starters). The reason why sex makes the list for this article is because, believe it or not, it's another way to strengthen your immune system. For one thing, sex helps to increase the antibodies in your system that fight germs and viruses.
On the oral sex tip, check out "Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits Of Sperm" to learn how sperm is basically like the ultimate multi-vitamin. There are also studies that couples who engage in coitus, no less than 1-2 times a week, end up producing more Immunoglobulin A (IgA) than those who don't. What the heck is that? Long story short, it's an antibody that helps your mucous membranes to stay in peak condition so that you get sick less often. Not to mention the fact that sex helps to decrease stress levels; the less stressed you are, the stronger your immune system will be. This brings me to my final point.
10. Reduce Your Stress Levels
If you want to make sure that you don't get sick in the upcoming months, you definitely need to do all that you can to prevent your stress levels from increasing. The reason why is because stress has the ability to literally suppress your immunity which makes you much more vulnerable to falling ill. So, make sure that you get no less than 6-8 hours of sleep, that you exercise at least 2-3 times a week, that you set healthy boundaries in your relationships, that you meditate, and that you drink lots of water (water helps to keep the natural stress hormone cortisol from elevating). And finally, chill out and relax. Do these things regularly, and it can help you to stay cold and flu-free and strengthen your immunity, from fall well through the spring.
Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.
Featured image by Shutterstock
- 10 Smart Hacks To Work Smarter, Not Harder - xoNecole: Women's ... ›
- 5 DIY Detox Baths For Relaxation - xoNecole: Women's Interest ... ›
- Eating Well: 10 Foods That Can Improve Your Mental Health ... ›
- Easy Ways To Increase Vitamin D Levels - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- 10 Lifestyle Hacks On How To Strengthen Your Immune System ›
- Simple Hacks to Naturally Boost Your Immune System ... ›
- 5 Easy, Natural Ways to Boost Your Immune System | Bicycling ›
- 7 Easy Ways to Boost Your Immune System, According to Harvard ... ›
- 15 Simple Hacks to Supercharge Your Immunity - Better ›
- 7 Hacks to Boost Your Immune System Now: BioLounge: Anti-Aging ›
Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Sometimes I get asked the same question, often enough, that I’m like, “It’s time to address this on a larger platform,” — and for, whatever the reason, as of late, folks have been asking me what different sex acts mean.
No, not from the perspective of positions or techniques. What they’ve basically wanted to know is if making love, having sex, and f-cking are simply different words to describe the same thing or if there truly is something deeper with each one.
Let me start this off by saying that of course, to a certain extent, the answer is subjective because it’s mostly opinion-rather-than-fact driven. However, I personally think that sex is hella impactful, which is why I hope that my personal breakdown will at least cause you to want to think about what you do, who you do it with, and why, more than you may have in the past.
Because although, at the end of the day, the physical aspects of making love, having sex, and f-cking are very similar, you’d be amazed by how drastically different they are in other ways…at the very same time.
Making Love
Back when I wrote my first book, I wasn’t even 30 at the time and still, one of the things that I said in it is, I pretty much can’t stand the term “make love.” Way back then, I stated that sex between two people who truly love each other and are committed for the long haul, when it comes to what they do in the bedroom, it’s so much more about CELEBRATING love than MAKING it. To make means “to produce” or “to bring into existence;” to celebrate means “to commemorate,” “to perform” or “to have or participate in a party, drinking spree, or uninhibited good time.”
The act of sex, standing alone? It can’t make love happen and honestly, believing otherwise is how a lot of people find themselves getting…got.
What do I mean? Tell me how in the world, you meet a guy, talk to him for a few weeks, don’t even know his middle name or where he was born and yet somehow, you choose to call the first time you have sex with him (under those conditions) “making love.” You don’t love him. You don’t know him well enough to love him. He doesn’t love you either (for the same reason). And yet you’re making love? How sway? Oh, but let that sex be bomb and those oxytocin highs might have you tempted to think that’s what’s happening — and that is emotionally dangerous. And yes, I mean, literally.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times before, that one of the reasons why I like that the Bible defines sex between a husband and his wife is by using the word “know” (Genesis 4:1) is because, well, I think that is what celebrating love is all about — we know each other well enough to know that we love each other, we know each other well enough to know that we aren’t going anywhere, and that knowing is what makes us want to celebrate that union by getting as close to one another and bringing as much physical pleasure to each other as we possibly can…as often as absolutely possible.
To me, that is what the peak of physical intimacy is all about — and the people who choose to use the term “make love,” it should be seen through this type of lens. When this type of mental and emotional bond comes together via each other’s bodies, they are amplifying love, enjoying love, embracing love.
Making it, though? Chile, the love has already been made. Sex is just the icing on the cake.
Having Sex
A few nights ago, I found myself rewatching this movie called Four of Hearts (which you can currently view on yep, you guessed it: Tubi). It’s about two married couples — one that is in an open marriage and another that isn’t although they somehow thought that sharing a night with the other couple would be a good idea (chile). Anyway, as one of the partners found themselves getting low-key sprung, the one they fell for said in one of the scenes, “It wasn’t a connection. It was just sex.” JUST. SEX.
Listen, when you decide to let a man put an entire part of his body inside of you at the risk of potentially getting an STI/STD or pregnant (because no form of birth control is 100 percent except for abstinence), it can never be “just sex” (somebody really needed to hear that too). At the same time, though, I got the character’s point because, if one or both people do not love each other or even deeply care for one another and/or sex is treated as an activity more than an act to establish a worthwhile connection and/or you and the person you are sleeping with have not really discussed what you are expecting from sex besides the act itself — you’re definitely not making/celebrating love.
Not by a long shot. What can make things get a bit complicated, though, is you’re doing the same act that “love makers” do without the same mental and emotional ties…or (sometimes) expectations.
You know, back when I decided to put all of my business out there via the piece “14 Lessons I've Learned From 14 Sex Partners,” now more than ever, I am quite clear that most of those guys fell into the “having sex” category. I wasn’t in the type of relationship with them where “making love” even made sense; however, because I was friends with most of them, we weren’t exactly f-cking (which I will get to in just a moment) either. We had a connection of some sort for the bedroom yet not enough to be together in the other rooms of the house.
We were really attracted and curious, so we decided to act on that. Oftentimes, the sex was good and so we rationalized that “having sex” was enough because if the friendship was, eh, “sound enough”, that we could justify the physical pleasure.
And y’all, that’s kind of what having sex is — it’s the limbo (or purgatory, depending on your situation) between making love and f-cking. The thing about limbo ish is it’s a lot like something being lukewarm: it’s not really one thing or another which means that it can completely blindside you, if you’re not careful (and totally honest with yourself as well as your partner(s)).
So, if you are contemplating having sex, I really — REALLY — recommend that you figure out how you feel, what you want (outside of the act itself) and if you are prepared for what “not quites” can bring. My mother used to say that the consequences of sex don’t change just because the circumstances do — and there is some solid “wow” to that, if you really stop to think about it.
And finally, f-ck. Although most experts on the word (and yes, there are some) agree that its origin is rooted somewhere within the German language (although some say that it might’ve come from Middle English words like fyke or fike which mean “to move about restlessly” or the Norwegian word fukka which means “to copulate”), you might have also heard that it is an acronym that once stood for “Fornication Under Consent of the King”; and there is actually some data that is connected to that as well.
Legend has it that way back in the day, in order to keep reproduction rates where a particular king wanted them to be, he would instruct his residents to have sex with each other — whether they were married or not (hence, the word “fornication” being in the acronym). However, because sex outside of marriage was taken far more seriously at the time, residents had to apply for a permit to participate so that the king could determine if things like their occupation and lineage would prove to be beneficial for the kingdom overall. F-ck: no love; just necessity. And although some believe this to be more myth than fact, what is certain is it was only over time that f-ck was seen as a profane/swear/cuss word — a word that was perceived to be so offensive, in fact, that between the years 1795-1965, it didn’t even appear in dictionaries.
Personally, when I think of this four-letter word, the first thing that actually comes to my mind is animals. Take a dog being in heat, for instance. That’s basically when a female dog is ovulating and wants to have sex the most. It’s not because they are “in love” with another dog; they are simply doing what instinctively comes to them — and since animals do not reason or feel at the same capacity that humans do, although they science says that many of them do experience pleasure when they engage in their version of sexual activity, it’s not nearly as layered or even profound as what we experience.
Let’s keep going. Another reason why f-cking makes me think of animals is due to the doggy style position. Hear me out. Ain’t it wild how, most of us pretty much know that the term comes from how dogs have sex, even though most animals have sex that same way — and think about it: Doggy style doesn’t consist of making eye contact or kissing while having intercourse. It’s “hitting from behind” without much emotional energy or effort at all. Just how animals do it. And so, yeah, f-cking does seem to be more about pure animal — or in our case, mammal — instinct. I don’t need to feel anything for someone, so long as the sexual desire is there. Hmph.
Something else that I find to be interesting about f-cking is how dictionaries choose to define it. Many of them are going to provide you with two definitions: “to have sexual intercourse with” and “to treat unfairly or harshly (usually followed by over)” and that definitely makes me think of another term — casual sex and words that define casual like apathetic, careless and without serious or definite intention. So, the dictionary says that while f-cking is about having sexual intercourse — just like making love and having sex is — it goes a step further and says that it can include being treated unfairly or harshly.
And although that can make you think of assault on the surface, for sure — sometimes being treated unfairly or harshly is simply feeling like someone had sex AT you and not really WITH you; instinct (i.e., getting off) and that’s about it. Yeah, the way this puzzle is coming together, f-cking seems to be more about lust and self and not much else.
Now That You Know the Difference, What to Keep in Mind
Y’all, this is definitely the kind of topic that I could expound on until each and every cow comes home. That said, here’s hoping that I provided enough perspective on each act to close this out by encouraging you to keep the following three things to keep in mind:
1. Before you engage in copulation, be honest with yourself about what you’re ACTUALLY doing — and that your partner agrees with you. You know, they say that our brain is our biggest sex organ and honestly, breaking down the differences between making love, having sex and f-cking helps to prove that fact. I say that because, although the sex act itself is pretty much the same across the board, you and your partner’s mindset can make the experience completely different. That said, if you think that you are making love and they think y’all are just having sex — stuff can get pretty dicey. Bottom line: communicate in the bedroom before attempting to connect outside of it. It’s always worth it when you do.
2. Yes, you can feel one way and do something else. I can just about guess what some of y’all are on: Shellie, we can love our partner and still just want to f-ck. If what you are saying is you can emotionally love someone and physically lust them and want to act sometimes on the lust without really factoring in the love — yes, I agree. Doggy style continues to be a favorite sex position for people, in general, and I’m more than confident that many of the participants polled are in a serious relationship. However, having lust-filled sex with someone who you know loves you is vastly different than doing it with someone who you have no clue what they think about you or you barely know at all. Y’all, please just make sure that you know…what you should know. Sex is too amazing to have a lot of regret after it.
3. Have realistic expectations about sex. Listen, so much of my life consists of writing and talking about sex that I will be the first one to say that it deserves a ton of props for what it is able to do, in a wonderful way, for people mentally, emotionally and physically. Yet again, I’m not a fan of “make love” because something that feels really good doesn’t always mean that it is good for you. Meaning, you’ve got to be real about what sex with someone will do to your mind and spirit — not just what it will do for your body. An author by the name of Gabriel García Márquez once said, “Sex is the consolation you have when you can't have love.” For no one, should this be a constant norm. Feel me? I hope you do.
____
One act. Three very different experiences.
It’s kind of wild that sex has the ability to create that — and yet, clearly, it does.
Please just make sure that you know which experience you’re signing up for.
So that you’re having sex (you know, in general) instead of sex having you. Real talk.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy