

This September, I heard the words that no one wants to hear: "You've been furloughed." I felt the numbness, confusion, and hopelessness that many humans across the world have experienced in the past several months. While I always knew that being furloughed or laid off was a possibility, I couldn't have prepared for what it felt like to lose my job. However, in October, I heard the words that everyone wants to hear: "You're hired!" Not only was I hired, but I nearly doubled my salary... in a pandemic… exactly one month after I had been furloughed.
The job hunt wasn't easy, but I learned so much along the way and hope that my experience can help others who are dealing with the same fate.
I started by changing my mindset.
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Being furloughed or laid off during a time when the job market has been flipped upside down is a nerve-racking experience. When I heard the news, I knew I had two choices: I could either wallow in my self-doubt, or I could channel all of my newly found energy and free time into finding a new job and advancing my career.
I instantly changed my mindset from viewing the furlough as an L to thinking of it as a chance to level up.
I know positive thinking didn't land me my job, but it did change the way I interacted with interviewers. I believe the genuine and positive energy I brought to each conversation increased my chances of landing the job.
I invested in professional career services.
That's right, invest. Spending extra money after being furloughed was not the easiest decision to make, but I knew it would be an important investment in my future. I am an advocate for LinkedIn premium, so one of the first things I did was reactivate my subscription. I also believe that a professional resume writer can take you very far. There is a lot of conflicting information out there about resumes. Should my resume be one page or two? Is a PDF better than a Word document? How can I beat the ATS system? I left these questions and more to my trusted resume writer who I have been working with for the past three years. Before getting my resume professionally spruced up, I received interviews with 10% of the companies I applied to; after my resume reset, I landed job interviews for 80% of the roles I applied to.
I networked like never before.
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As an introvert, this wasn't easy for me. A few hours after I was furloughed, I sent out emails to people in my network, letting them know what happened and asking them if they would be willing to connect. Every person I reached out to was more than willing to help. I also joined Slack channels like #HIREBlack and connected with recruiters from companies I wanted to work with. Finally, I used the Paying It Forward worksheet to meet allies who are top execs at some of the biggest companies in the world. Although my job offer didn't come from a referral, connecting with people opened up my pool of options and let me know I had a safety net to fall back on.
I became comfortable with rejection.
And I was rejected A LOT. But I 100% believe that every 'no' gets you closer to the perfect 'yes'. Because I knew from the beginning that rejection is a part of the process, I was able to bounce back immediately after every rejection email. Rejection stings, but getting to the interview stage at any company is an accomplishment in itself and assured me that I was on the right track and was competitive in the pool of applicants.
I prioritized self-care.
During the first week of my job search, I made the mistake of spending 100% of my time applying, interviewing and networking. I would wake up in the middle of the night to check LinkedIn or read interviewing tips. This was not only unhealthy but also unsustainable. I decided to treat my job search like a 9-5 work day. I blocked off time on my calendar for job searching and interviewing and I also scheduled time to do things completely unrelated to finding a new position. I focused on getting enough sleep, doing something that made me happy each day, and meditating to calm my frazzled nerves.
Taking care of my mind and body allowed me to be more present and deliberate during the times dedicated to the job search.
I want to be clear, my job search wasn't perfect. I low-balled myself, I missed emails, I didn't rely on my support system as much as I could have. But because I invested in myself and my network, I was able to find a company and hiring manager that believe in diversity, equity and inclusion.
Ultimately, being furloughed was a blessing in disguise for me. It forced me out of my comfort zone and showed me that greater things are available and achievable. If you've been furloughed or laid off, I hope my journey inspires you to not give up and know that the next big thing for you is right around the corner.
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Roscoe Dash joined xoMan host Kiara Walker to share the journey of his personal and spiritual evolution—from the party anthems that made him famous to a deeper life rooted in faith, family, and purpose. This episode offers an honest look at how the artist has grown beyond early fame, addressing fatherhood, masculinity, creativity, and healing.
Dash opened up about the internal transformation that has guided him away from chasing the spotlight and toward seeking peace. “Faith and fear can’t occupy the same space,” he said, underscoring his shift toward a more spiritually grounded life. Throughout the interview, he emphasized the importance of self-reflection:
“The most important conversations to me, honestly, outside of the ones you have with God, is the ones you have with yourself in the mirror.”
Dash is focused on the man he’s become. “I’m not the accolades I’ve achieved—I’m the person who achieved them,” he added, pointing to a broader understanding of identity and worth. A large part of that growth has come through fatherhood, especially raising daughters, which he said has deepened his understanding of love. “Love is unconditional and love loves to love no matter what,” he shared.
He also spoke candidly about the pressures of fame and its impact on creativity. “Chasing fame can kill your creativity as a musician,” he warns. Instead, his advice to other artists is simple but clear: “Keep your focus on your art form, whatever that may be, and stay passionate.”
The conversation also touches on gender dynamics and emotional safety in relationships. “Safe men make soft women. If she feels safe, she’ll melt like butter,” he said, challenging traditional notions of masculinity. Roscoe also offers wisdom on discernment and spiritual testing: “Sometimes the devil will give you what looks better than your blessing.”
Ultimately, Dash has learned to embrace peace over chaos. “All I can do is control what I can control. And that's how I respond to things and what I'm giving out,” he said. It’s a thoughtful, soulful side of Roscoe Dash that many may not expect—but one that leaves a lasting impression.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube