6 Effortlessly Sexy Date Night Outfits That Are Better Than Your Average
Instead of searching the mall and online boutiques for hours on end, xoNecole has taken the liberty of compiling this list of effortlessly sexy date night outfit ideas, just for you.
I, for one, can admit that a lot of the go-to pieces have in my wardrobe have been "gone to" a few too many times, and I thought it was time to switch it up. To help me on my quest for the perfect threads, I've enlisted the help of Denver-based designer and professional stylist, Felicia Benevidez.
Felicia and I met up at a local restaurant called The Family Jones, where she gave me all the knowledge on how to wow my date without even trying. These styles can be easily recreated using staples in your closet and a whole lot of attitude. Let's get into these looks!
Everyone has a little black dress in their closet, but Felicia shows us how to put the game down, flip it, and reverse it to create an entirely new look. For Valentine's Day, instead of rocking your usual, try adding jeans and accessories to your LBD to add flair and personality. Felicia told xoNecole:
"When all else fails, I feel like you can never go wrong with a little black dress. Creating layers by adding jeans and a sheer overlay automatically takes the look from classic to edgy. The iridescent purse, hoop earrings, and gold shoe adds the perfect final touch to complete my look for date night with bae!"
Ladies, I have the answer to the age-old question women have debated about for years: Size does matter. I mean, when it comes to clothes, at least. Rocking at oversized blazer can set your outfit off in a way that is super unique and known to turn heads. Keep it sexy by wearing thigh-high socks or boots, and feel free to add shorts for a more conservative look. The designer shared:
"I don't know about you, but a blazer always makes me feel put together. To keep it sexy for date night, I added thigh high socks and an extended button up shirt. I finished this look with a black pump and a belt to create some structure and emphasize my waist."
Nothing says effortlessly sexy like a jumpsuit and some booties. For some real fun, use some bold colors like Felicia did in this look! Your jumpsuit game has the potential to level up in a major way if you incorporate accessories and makeup that add a pop of color. According to Felicia, out of all the looks, this one is the easiest to pull off:
"A good jumpsuit makes getting dressed easy, when all you have to add are shoes and accessories! This limited jumpsuit comes from my clothing line VFM and is the perfect look for Valentine's Day! I added a pop of color by adding red booties, a matching purse, and don't forget the red lip."
Who knew a wide-leg pant and a blazer could make a t-shirt look so damn classy? This style is easy to accomplish with any flared pant in your wardrobe, but you can go the extra mile by adding some edgy accessories. Felicia explained:
"This chic date night look consist of a pair of my favorite wide leg pants from my clothing line VFM. I paired them with a T-shirt and yellow blazer to add a pop of color. The leather gloves and platform shoe completes the look and adds the perfect amount of edge."
For women like me who enjoy feeling bad and bougie on a budget, this look is perfect. The best part about this look is, it's flexible and low-maintenance but still looks expensive and elegant. You can achieve this look by mixing any animal print with the faux fur accessory of your choice. Set your look off by adding the maxi skirt of your choice and you've just created the frugal outfit find of your dreams. Felicia shared:
"For this look, I based the outfit around a pleated maxi skirt. To accentuate the deep maroon color, I added a nude animal print turtleneck. Because I love to play with prints, I finished the look off with a cheetah print bootie and fur stole. Such an easy and great look for a night out on the town!"
Grown and sexy takes on a whole new meaning when it comes to this look. Grab any piece of lingerie in your wardrobe and pair it with a pair of slacks and a blazer to turn into the seriously sultry seductress of your man's dreams. To give your fit a little something extra, add a shoe and lip to offer a bold pop of color. What's better is, this look is so effortlessly sexy, the only accessory you'll need is your smile. Felicia told me:
"When the goal is grown and sexy, a pant suit is definitely my go-to. For the perfect date night look, I added a bodysuit and bright pump. My hair was the only accessory, and yes the bigger the better."
It's my hope that you can take these tips and be as sexy as you wanna be for your partner on this special holiday, no matter how you two decide to celebrate. This year, instead of harping over how you look, remember that no matter what you wear, your sexy comes effortlessly!
Thanks again to The Family Jones for letting us use your space to create magic! To find these pieces, check out A Vintage Frame of Mind's online boutique here.
Additional styling by Joce Blake. Makeup by Bree Klee.
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Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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I Took Three Months Off From Work In The Name Of Radical Self-Preservation
In the fourth quarter of 2023, I finally did it. I pulled the plug! To be honest, it was a long time coming. I spent years juggling all of the balls in my life, and on October 2, 2023, I dropped every one of them and fell into surrender mode.
I couldn’t take it anymore - work, family, relationships, politics, death, the ramifications of COVID-19, and my fears creeping in. I had either put off dealing with these things, or I simply didn’t want to acknowledge them. Instead, my time, energy, and focus were on everyone and everything beside me. I pushed myself to the limit; then everything started to consume me. Burnout was swallowing me whole, you feel me?
All of this forced me to do some much-needed introspection which I turned into my self-proclaimed, "Fade to Black Season."
What is a “Fade to Black Season,” you may ask?
It’s a call to rest.
It’s a call to reset.
It’s a call to retreat into a deep, quiet space.
It’s radical self-preservation.
Deciding to step back from everything was not an easy decision for me. I contemplated taking a break from everything for many years until I couldn’t put it off anymore. If I didn’t take this time off, I knew I wouldn’t be able to truly show up for the life that I claimed that I wanted for myself.
I know I’m not the only one who has felt this immense weight on their shoulders. Why? Because I’m a Black woman. According to Every Level Leadership, 88% of Black women sometimes often, or always have experienced burnout. And let’s be honest here - Black women work harder than any other group. We are the backbone of our jobs, families, and community. Because of this, we must incorporate rest as an integral part of our well-being. In case there’s some pushback, I’ll leave this quote here for you to marinate on:
“If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.” - Zora Neale Hurston
The reality is that with piles of work and life obligations, many of us are walking time bombs. And, for me, two weeks of PTO/vacation wasn’t enough time needed to balance myself, so I took three months off. If you feel called to do so, let this be your inspiration to take your own “Fade to Black Season.”
Here’s what I did.
- Shadow Work: I became best friends with my journal and illuminated the things I hid from myself to heal. Shadow work consists of the things you don’t like about yourself, your conscious and unconscious fears, and other negative emotions that exist due to past experiences and trauma.
- Trigger Warning: During this time, I let my triggers become my wisest teacher. I asked myself why various experiences, news, or communications resulted in negativity. I observed them, listened, and learned why they took up so much space in my life. Then, I allowed myself to choose to be open to a different outcome or feeling moving forward.
- Get Back To Pleasure: I re-centered my pleasure. I had to remind myself of what turned me on. I allowed myself to take life slowly, engage my senses, and play. I signed up for every tantra workshop, went to art museums in the middle of the day, took movement classes, and went to dance parties. I moved all the stagnant energy out of my body.
- Let Others Lift You Up: I let my people love on me. I let my loved ones take care of me. This wasn’t easy. I was used to being everyone’s support system and soft space to land. However, in my time of need, I finally let my tribe show up and show out for me. My only regret is not letting them do this sooner.
- Social Media Break: I broke up with social media during this time. Reclaiming my time and attention was an integral factor in calming my nervous system. I put blockers on my phone, and when I felt the urge to swipe and scroll, I took a walk or picked up a book.
- Redefine Your Life: After doing this type of work, I knew that I would never be the same. In this new space, boundaries and balance are prioritized, and everything else has to fall in line. I now have the mental/emotional space and capacity to do my best work!
Best of all, during this time, I found God in myself, and I loved her, fiercely.
My “Fade To Black" Season allowed me to grieve in peace, rest, tap into unrelenting joy, and simply be. At this point, me and peace got a good thing going on. Nothing else will be tolerated!
For those of you who are nervous about taking the first step, use The Dufree Foundation’s DIY Sabbatical Guide to help you plan, prep, and prepare yourself for your sabbatical - this is something I wish I had done before I leaped. Consider going on a Divine Pause Retreat to learn tips and tricks to avoid mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual burnout.
For those who work in social impact, apply for The Durfee Sabbatical program, which offers $60,000 and a three-month sabbatical, so nonprofit leaders can be a lever for whole systems change.
The choice to take a sabbatical is up to you! Just remember to prioritize yourself and never pour from an empty cup.
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Featured image by Maskot/Getty Images