4 Ways To Modify Your Resolutions To Manifest Greatness In 2019
As a writer, I believe in the power of words. As a woman of faith, I believe that we manifest what we speak and do the most. I apply both principles to the way I set goals and resolutions. I take time to truly understand what I feel and what I want, then I work to speak those very things into existence, and onto my vision board. It's the difference between wanting a boyfriend and wanting a husband. Anyone can be a boyfriend, but sis, I want a husband; I want my husband. That is what I speak. And in doing so, I call into existence the very thing I desire: my husband.
See where I'm going with this?
This same idea should be applied to your New Year's resolutions. While it's easier to set standard resolutions each year, it's important (and far more beneficial) to set resolutions that honor your true desires. This way, you declare and work toward what you truly want.
To manifest your heart's desires, it's important to speak to the depths of what they really are. Below are the most common resolutions with new suggested language. The point of this isn't to hijack your resolutions, but to encourage you to think critically about how to ask for – and manifest – what you truly want for the new year.
Common Resolution: I want to lose weight.
Suggested Resolution: I want to be healthier.
Rationale: Losing weight is a great goal but it's often created under superficial pretenses. If you want to lose weight for you, go for it! But if you want to lose weight to emulate the people you see online and in magazines, then you'll always fall short. Losing weight will always be a challenge when your desire to do so is for inauthentic reasons. Instead, opt for something more beneficial to you in the long-term.
"I want to be healthy" is rooted more in self-love and -care, as opposed to "losing weight" which is often a desire rooted in self-loathing. Through self-love and body positivity, you're more likely to make the changes necessary to yield the results you're looking for. You'll eat better, establish healthier habits, and dedicate yourself to discipline – not because you hate your weight, but because you love yourself. Changing this language takes the thought off of the dissatisfaction we usually have for our weight and puts an emphasis on what matters most: our health. Opt for this resolution rooted in self-love and you'll begin to see the weight loss results you've always longed for.
Common Resolution: I want to learn a new trade.
Suggested Resolution: I want to sharpen my gifts.
Rationale: Growth is a beautiful thing and finding interest in a new trade is wonderful. But, sometimes we let knowing how to do many things steer us from doing the right things. Instead of trying to learn something completely new – and possibly unrelated to your life's purpose – focus on sharpening your gifts.
Your gifts were provided to you, divinely, for a reason. They are what you've been provided to live a purposeful life and carry out God's assignment. Many times, the new talents we're looking to establish are just our gifts that haven't been developed yet. Desiring to sharpen your gifts will not only ensure you're learning new things, but that those new things are relevant to the work you were put here to do. Remaining intentional about what new skills you establish helps position you for a life rooted in purpose.
Current Resolution: I want new/more friends.
Suggested Resolution: I want better/more quality friendships.
Rationale: I said this one plenty of times. I wanted more friends for the different things I wanted to do, and the different areas of life I needed companionship in. I felt that having more friends – particularly, professional friends, creative friends, going out friends, friends who give good advice – would fill those various voids. It didn't; in fact, it made it harder, for an introvert like me, to keep up with and nurture those many friendships.
While I don't think there's anything wrong with having different friends for different things, I think there's a missed opportunity in not understanding why. Sometimes we say we want new friends when what we really want is a different presence in our friendships. Instead of rushing off to make new ones, expecting voids to be filled, work on cultivating better more quality friendships.
Current Resolution: I want a new job.
Suggested Resolution: I want my dream job, or I want a job in my career.
Rationale: Sometimes you do just want a new job to get out of your current one. But a lot of times, our cry for a new job, is really a cry for work that we're passionate about. The more we ask for a new job, the more new jobs we'll get; but at some point, we must switch gears and work to manifest what we truly desire: a fulfilling career. Being clear about our desire for meaningful work, rather than a new job, will get us to be more intentional about our pursuit throughout the new year. It can also open you up to opportunities at your current job that you never thought to consider.
The more critically we think about our 2019 goals, the more intentional we become when proclaiming them. The clearer we are about our desires, the more likely we are to work to manifest them. So as you prepare for the new year, do so with reflection, self-discovery, and clear, intentional resolutions.
Featured image by Getty Images.
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Zoe Hunter is the writer, speaker, and creator behind the women empowerment brand DEAR QUEENS. She uses vulnerability, storytelling, and spiritual development to empower women toward healthy decision-making. Stay connected to Zoe's work by visiting DEARQUEENS.com or following her on Twitter @zDEARQUEENS.
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Compton-born singer Steve Lacy has made a name for himself in recent years, thanks to songs like the mega-hit "Bad Habit." Touted as a sonic love child of the likes of Stevie Wonder meets Prince, the 25-year-old has carved a lane of his own as a producer, singer-songwriter, and guitarist to the tune of a dazzling genre-bending blend of rock, R&B, and pop songs that are as infectious as they are intricate.
The breakout success of "Bad Habit" and the positive reception of his Grammy award-winning sophomore album Gemini Rights proves how deeply Steve has cemented his position in the lane he's decided to occupy, which according to the "N Side" artist is a place that is "far removed" from the industry.
But who is the musician beyond the iconic braids and viral hits defining Gen Z? If you're just getting familiar, here are 9 things about Steve Lacy you should know:
1.For Steve Lacy, owning his narrative is important and he doesn't like to be placed in a box:
In a 2022 interview, he told The Guardian:
“Something big for me as a kid, and to this day, is owning my narrative. I didn’t want to do things if it would put a title on me. As a kid, there was so much homophobia. I love dance but I was like, I don’t want people to assume I’m gay, so I didn’t discover dancing. A lot of people didn’t know I could sing until I put some music out because I didn’t want my family to be, ‘Oh yeah, Steve’s a singer – Steve, sing us something!’ I just didn’t want anyone to assume something. I’m just weird!”
2.He had a near-death experience involving a drunk driver who crashed into him.
Steve touched on the topic of his near-death experience that happened three years ago for a recent cover story with Variety, where it was detailed that his car got crashed into by a drunk driver who hit him at full speed.
“Being that close to death, I had the realization that you could be doing everything right, and then some fucking dumbass can crash into your car head-on. And that could be it.”
3.Steve used to cold pitch beats to artists he admired and eventually worked with Kendrick Lamar on his song "PRIDE":
In his teens, Steve was friends with musician Jameel Bruner (who is also musician Thundercat's brother) and became intrigued by the way he created beats on a laptop. Shortly after, he was invited to play with Jameel's group at the time, a band known as The Internet. There, he would send cold pitches to artists like GoldLink and Isaiah Rashad in the form of DMs and emails.
One of his collaborators, singer-songwriter Ezra Koenig from the group Vampire Weekend eventually connected him with DJ Dahi, a producer who would become Steve's mentor and a catalyst for the work Steve would do on Kendrick Lamar's studio album DAMN. Steve revealed to The Guardian:
“I came with a laptop on my back, guitar in my hand, ready for whatever. First thing Kendrick says to me in this room full of guys: ‘Yeah, I seen your face in some music videos’. I said, ‘Hey, yours too man!’ I did it, broke the ice. We start jamming on new ideas, he’s playing me stuff he’s working on for Damn. I’m handling myself really cool, calm and collected, but I was freaking the fuck out, you know? There was a moment when it was quiet, Kendrick was on his phone, and I was like: let me play you some beats. Really scary – I jumped off the cliff.”
“I was in London the first time it came out. I walked to the Starbucks down the street and I’m listening to the album, and by the time I get back to the hotel, Pride is playing, I’m crying, the Damn electronic billboard is right there – I’m like, what the hell is my life?”
4.Steve is ambivalent to the 'queer icon' status the media tries to assign him because of his sexuality:
“I don’t like to handle that stuff in a way that’s shocking. I don’t feel brave or tough, it’s just how I exist... It should be a joke that we put so much emphasis on sexuality." - via LA Times
"I never care to speak for anyone else, because I think all of our experiences are so different from each other,” he says. “I guess I have a selfish perspective of myself in the world, and I’m just expressing myself. I’m not necessarily doing things for other people to feel good about themselves." - via Variety
5.Steve Lacy on not feeling like he 'needed' to come out as bisexual and thinking it's 'silly':
“But I didn’t really come out. I didn’t try to — it just kinda happened. I don’t care to announce who I’m into sexually. I think it’s silly. I never felt like I needed to come out.” - via Variety
6.Though 'Gemini Rights' is inspired by his breakup with his ex-boyfriend, Steve insists his art is about himself:
“I have no idea what he’s up to. This is my job, you know? Songs are not really about him. They’re about me. I’ve got to do this to feel less crazy or alone.” - via LA Times
In an interview with The Guardian that was published a few months earlier than the one quoted above, Steve said this about his split with his ex and their whirlwind seven-month relationship:
"I just felt like I tried, I kept trying, I kept wanting to try, and nothing was working. [I wanted to] just communicate openly, but it was just hard. But I made a great record, and I love him, it’s all good.”
7.He owes his curiousity to his late Filipino father:
In an interview with the LA Times, Steve acknowledged the memory of his late Filipino father and acknowledges a gift he left him with:
“I definitely feel parts of him for sure. I was really young and I didn’t get to meet the whole him. I have to rely on stories from my mom to tell me what he was like, but he left me with a curiosity to understand things deeper. My mom said he was very intuitive.”
8.Therapy helped Steve see art for what it was instead of what it could be:
In an interview with The Guardian, the singer-songwriter shared, that therapy allowed him to “be more open in creating, moving the things out of the way that will keep me from being my best self. I was getting rid of that pedestal: an Artist. No – we’re all people contributing to a collective consciousness.”
9.Steve says there's freedom in not having to conform in order to have success:
“I didn’t have to conform to whatever would make me a ‘success.’ I didn’t have to have people in my ear telling me what will work. I feel more freedom now than expectations, because I didn’t have to change anything. I just had to get better.” - via LA Times
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Featured image by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images