Are You Cheating If You Have A Work Husband?
There are honestly some things that you just can't tell your man that you can tell your work husband.
Your work husband speaks your same language and understands all of your “inside jokes." He drinks coffee with you every morning, knows your birthday, your favorite food, all of your pet peeves, and he is always there when you need to vent. A day doesn't go by that you don't talk and laugh with him about absolutely nothing.
A work husband is a type of office spouse that you work with and share a special work relationship with that can be very similar to the one that you may have with someone that you are intimate with, like with your husband or boyfriend.
When I first heard of the term “work husband" or “work wife" I immediately thought, “Oh hell no! I wish my man would have a work wife!".Now that I have thought more about it, the idea of an office spouse is not bad as long as certain lines are not crossed (okay, I wouldn't be cool with my boyfriend even using the word “wife" when referring to someone else - even if it was just a work wife).
If you are in a relationship, but have a close male friend at work, it is important to keep your relationship with them strictly nonsexual and completely platonic. Although you know in your head you would never cheat on your significant other, you have to keep in mind that the same person that you call your work husband is someone that you spend all day with, take lunch breaks with, and share all of your thoughts, hopes, and dreams with.
Even though you may not see it or admit it, there is some form of intimacy between you two with the type of relationship that you have - but you are just not intimate. Well, not yet.
Just think about it. You are with that work husband all day long. You share a special bond. And what if he is walking around looking like Michael B. Jordan, too? Whew! What are you going to do?
Before your innocent work marriage turns into an affair, utilize the tips below so that you don't break up their happy home or yours.
Don't keep the relationship secret.
If you feel the need to not tell your man about another male friend, then honestly, it looks suspicious. Your man should know about your male friends, and you should know about his. Just think about it and put yourself in his shoes. How would you feel if your man had a close female friend at work, but didn't tell you about it? Yeah, I know, all hell would break loose!
Introduce them, but don't make it awkward.
If you have a close relationship with your work husband, then your man should definitely meet him. The meeting should be casual - maybe at a happy hour or at your job's holiday party. When you introduce your work husband to your man, introduce him by using the title that he has in your life. For example, if your significant other is your boyfriend, the introduction should be, “Hey, this is my boyfriend, my honey that I am always telling you about." This will show your man that you are not ashamed to tell the whole world who he is, and what he means to you.
Remember, what happens at home, stays at home.
When you first got together with your man, everything may have been like heaven on Earth, but we all know that things happen, and that heaven doesn't last all day, every day. There will be times when your man upsets you or when you two will go through some things. When this happens, keep these private details of your relationship away from your work husband. Honestly, it isn't his business, and I'm sure your man wouldn't want you crying to another man about him. Would you care if he vented to another woman about you? Yeah, I thought so.
No texting after dark allowed.
I don't know about you, but if my man's phone buzzes late at night, my head switches around so quickly, and I wonder, “Who in the hell has the audacity to text/call him this late at night?" Unless it is an emergency, I always felt people should have more respect for me as his woman and not call or text his phone late at night - especially his female friends.
The same should go for you and your work husband. Although you and he have a special bond, keep the text messaging to a minimum, especially after hours. If there is something that you need to tell him and it is late, let it wait until the next day.
Don't look like a side-line chick.
Personally, I have a few male friends, and most of them are in relationships. When I see their girlfriends or wives, I make sure that I am friendly and I try my best to make her feel comfortable. I never want my friends girlfriends to think that I have something going on with their man.
You should try to do the same with your work husband. Whenever you are around her, make sure you acknowledge her and look at both of them when talking. Even more, find something nice to say about her. Every woman can admit that flattery is the easiest way to a woman's heart, so make sure you tell her how much you've heard about her (and if she has on a nice outfit, it is okay to tell her that too).
What do you think about having work husbands or work wives? Do you have one, and if so, how do you keep the relationship innocent? Let us know below!
Featured image by Getty Images
- Seven signs you have a work spouse - CNN.com ›
- Urban Dictionary: Work Husband ›
- Signs You've Crossed The Line With Your Work Spouse | HuffPost ›
- Your Work Husband: 4 Rules for Keeping the Peace at Work and ... ›
- Why Scientists Think You Should Have a Work Spouse | Inverse ›
- Are you crossing the line with your work spouse? - Chicago Tribune ›
- Subtle signs you have a work spouse - BI ›
Brittani Hunter is a proud PVAMU alumni and the founder of The Mogul Millennial, a business and career platform for Black Millennials. Meet Brittani on Twitter and on the Gram at @BrittaniLHunter and @mogulmillennial.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Rihanna Talks Shedding Expectations And Finding Balance As A Mother
Since becoming a mother in 2022, Rihanna has defined parenthood by her terms and hopes to pass that sense of autonomy on to her children.
For Vogue China’s April cover story, Rihanna shared her perspective on raising her two sons with A$AP Rocky, and how she hopes to preserve her children’s uniqueness, devoid of societal expectations.
"The most beautiful thing...is that [children] come into the world with their own individuality and sincerity, without any logic or conformity,” she told the publication. “Which usually makes you feel that you must fit into a certain group."
The “Work” artist, known for her trendsetting style and captivating persona, expressed her desire to support children in fully embracing their individuality and encouraging them to be whoever they want to be. "It's really beautiful to see and I want to continue to help them navigate that and make sure that they know they can be whoever they want to be,” she says.
She continues, “They should embrace it completely, because it's beautiful, and it's unique. I love them just that way."
From shattering music charts to shaking up the beauty industry, Rihanna has forged a path that has since created the “dream” life we see today. One that she says has made her parents proud of.
“I’m living my dream,” she continued. “My parents were very proud of that because they just wanted me to be happy and successful. So, I think the key thing is to find some kind of balance. Yes, balance is important. Do this and you get the best of both worlds. You can write your own life the way you want, and it will be beautiful. Sometimes, you just need to let go of everyone’s expectations and start living your own story.”
Rihanna, who shares sons, RZA, 23 months, and Riot, 8 months, with rapper A$AP Rocky, recently shared her vision for expanding her family in the future in Interview Magazine.
When stylist Mel Ottenberg asked about the number of additional children she hoped to have, Rihanna replied, "As many as God wants me to have.”
"I don't know what God wants, but I would go for more than two. I would try for my girl,” she adds. “But of course, if it's another boy, it's another boy."
Featured image by Neil MockfordWireImage