I Tried It! This Vibrator Sends Electric Shocks To Your Vulva

Sex

I have a tendency to ignore my gut, but as I learn this, I'm working on listening a little closer when it's telling me, "This just ain't workin'. Throw in the towel."


I also know that I need validation and I'm working that out too. Give me a little bit of credit here, ladies. Although, I'm sure you're thinking we're talking about my interpersonal communication skills among other beings, I'm actually talking about the latest toy I reviewed, the Tickling Truman, where I was forced to go read other reviews to tell me what I already knew.

THIS. AIN'T. IT.

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Sure, the name gives it all away but what can I say? My mother taught me not to judge a book by its cover...or its name.

So, I adamantly sought out this toy after finding out it had an electro-stem feature. Electroplay is a kink of mine that I recently discovered, and it's exactly how it sounds, unless it sounds like I take lightning bolts to the clit, then no I have not worked my way up to that yet (since I'm sure it's a possibility). But I do like the beginner electro-play, typically carried out by toys such as the Neon Wand or the Violet Wand that can feel as light as a static shock and work its way up the intensity scale.

Well, this toy is supposed to have a similar but slightly weaker impact from my understanding. Now, did it actually turn out that way? You'll have to read on to find out the 4 things I learned while trying to shock my kitty-cat out of its coma:

No Shocker

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There was a lot of hype surrounding this toy among my friends in the kink community because of its electro feature. I went into it wanting to see what it might feel like to have the inside of my vagina receive a static shock, while in reality, it felt more like an intensified vibration. A tingle, I guess. However, let Truman roam and ZAP! You could feel the shock on super sensitive areas like your anus or that weird middle ground between your anus and your vagina.

Level Up

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This toy has a total of 6 vibrators and although the symbols provide clarity, I found myself struggling to turn on the toy and clearly see when I was increasing the intensity. The only way that I could truly tell that the e-stem feature was at work was when it shocked my booty hole *Tiffany Haddish voice*.

While there were allegedly five different e-stem modes with up to ten levels of intensity for each, I could barely figure out how to turn the damn thing on. So much so, that I settled for one mode and if I happened to stumble upon another, fine. The buttons are not as intuitive as I would like them to be when I'm trying to get off, as it requires you to tinker with it quite a bit and this probably has a lot to do with there being so many of them. I honestly think that having six buttons is record-breaking for a vibrator, but maybe that's just me.

Big Dick Energy...Not

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Truman was like the big dick that couldn't. Standing at 10 inches with a silicone girth (or diameter) of 5 inches, Truman was flexible and eager to please and I was eager to take Truman in but to little avail.

Truman delivered the kind of sex where you stare up at the ceiling waiting for a miracle and much like the other reviewers, I searched high and low for a clitorally focused toy to pair with this hoping to deliver me an orgasm. Since I couldn't find my itty bitty vibrator, this looked like me f*cking myself with a 10-inch vibrator while holding my Hitachi on my clit.

Bow Out

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This toy was supposed to have a kegel feature but I'm not sure that I ever found it and I'm almost positive that unless you're just into the toy as a whole, you're better off buying a separate but far superior kegel toy. I was very disappointed with my couple of nights with Truman. However, as always, I have to acknowledge that I'm a clit girl. When my clitoris is being stimulated I'm at my best and most orgasmic – so I suppose it's no surprise that Truman was a miss and not a hit.

Related Stories:

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