DJ Khaled Just Reminded Me Why I'm Done With Male-Centric Sex
Male-centric sex in my life has come to an end.
I was recently talking to a friend who told me that one of his greatest fantasies was to get the best head of his life on top of a mountain. He continued on to say he's never gotten any really amazing head before, to which I replied, "You put in what you get out. Maybe you haven't gotten any amazing head because you haven't given any amazing head".
"Oh, I don't do that," he said adamantly and without hesitation.
Really?
While I understand that every relationship is different, I was convinced that the oral sex double standard had been played out for years; I was sadly mistaken. Reflecting back on my own sexual experiences, I realize that when I was younger, it was taboo to ask a guy to eat the box, but now that I've grown into a woman, it's a requirement.
An interview between DJ Khaled and The Breakfast Club from 2014 recently resurfaced and has the internet up in arms about whether or not it's necessary for your man to reciprocate oral sex and prompting some hilarious commentary from onlookers. In the interview, Khaled said:
"It's different rules for men. We the king, so there's some things y'all might not wanna do, [but] it gotta get done. I just can't do what you want me to do. I just can't."
Khaled isn't alone in his thinking, as many cultures hail cunnilingus as a submissive act.
"I believe a woman should praise the man, the king. If you holding it down for the woman, I feel the woman should praise and the man should praise the queen but my way of praising is called 'How was dinner? You like the house you living in?' 'You like all the clothes you getting,' 'I'm taking care of your family. I'm taking care of my family?' You know, putting in the work."
Y'all smell that? Smells like the funky ass patriarchy indulging in some internalized misogyny at play here, and I want to get to the bottom of it. For years, vaginas have been used and abused for convenience, but I have made it my personal mission to end the male-centric sex in my life.
I have one golden rule in the bedroom, I come first.
Eating p*ssy is an obvious prerequisite for my strict requirement, and I won't have sex with a man unless he's down to lick all 32 flavors.
Stars like Dwayne Johnson, Amanda Seales, and even the dictionary weighed in on the comical double standard. Seales joked in an Instagram video:
"So, Khaled doesn't eat p***... How can someone that's so much about motivation and support not understand the value of putting your face in the box? And then you gotta wonder like, what is he doing, if he ain't eating the puss?"
Let's face it, vaginal orgasms from strictly penetration are pretty much a myth. If you know someone who's had one, please find her and ask her to call me, I need to understand how this happened. Women normally require some type of clitoral stimulation before achieving an orgasm, and it's time to retire the age old theology that the d*ck should be enough. It's just not bro. No matter how big, wide, and strong a man is, it takes some quality TLC to help a woman reach her level of optimal pleasure.
Although I personally need a bang for my buck, this writer from Madame Noire hit the nail on the head about the real message that men perpetuate by not being willing to go down on their lovers: that they are selfish, inconsiderate and ignorant.
"Perhaps, he has a rare woman who doesn't appreciate oral sex and she's happy with him. At the end of the day, everything ain't for everybody. But what's particularly troubling is the message that's being disseminated here. I'm not speaking about Khaled and his fiancee. It might work for the both of them. But being in a romantic relationship requires more than money to ensure that both parties are happy. Paying for dinner, buying clothes and taking care of family doesn't give men a pass to have all their needs met while a woman goes without."
As much as I enjoy watching a man's eyes roll back and his toes curl as I give him the the ride of his life, no man will enjoy the fruits of my fellatio without offering up some sloppy top first.
The misogynistic idea that women should be satisfied by mediocre dick and the fulfillment of basic financial obligations alone is dead. Millennial women have succeeded in pioneering and securing the bag and achieving sexual liberation, creating a culture of women who know that they too, deserve to have orgasms.
Reciprocity is key.
If you haven't seen the controversial video yet already, click here or watch it below.
- Dwayne Johnson Speaks Out After DJ Khaled Admits He Doesn't Go ... ›
- DJ Khaled Doesn't Like Giving Oral Sex to Women ›
- DJ Khaled said he does not perform oral sex on women because ... ›
- DJ Khaled Said He Expects Oral Sex But Won't Return The Favor ... ›
- DJ Khaled Doesn't Go Down On His Wife, Why That Sucks ›
- Breakfast Club Classic: DJ Khaled Explains Why He Doesn't Go ... ›
- DJ Khaled Said He Doesn't Go Down on Women and the Internet ... ›
- DJ Khaled Doesn't Eat It - YouTube ›
- DJ Khaled Explains Why He Doesn't Go Down on Women ›
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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6 Spring Events To Boost Your Professional And Social Networks
When spring arrives, we all want to be outside, looking fabulous, and back to socializing. And now is the perfect time to add a few great events to your calendar to get you through the quarter in order to make new friends, build new partnerships, and talk new opportunities to level up.
Spring is a high season for networking and social events for Black women, with many organizations and event entrepreneurs booking prime locations and offering dynamic experiences that you can maximize in whatever way possible. Write down your goals, and get out there. Start with a few of these events between now and the start of summer:
New Orleans Jazz And Heritage Festival, April 23 - May 3
The New Orleans Jazz And Heritage Festival is a 10-day event held over two weekends, bringing together thousands of musicians, craftspeople, and food lovers to share in common threads of culture in the heart of New Orleans. You'll get to enjoy works by artisans local to Louisiana as well as from across the U.S. and around the world.
Black Food Truck Festival, April 26-28
Hosted in Charleston, S.C., the Black Food Truck Festival includes an opening party, access to more than two dozen food truck vendors, and a time to workout with other attendees. Charleston has long been known as a Southern foodie destination, with global recognition due to James Beard-awarded chefs heading popular restaurants there and a renewed focus on Gullah and Geechee culture and food in the region. And what better conversation ice-breaker than to talk about food with a new acquaintance?
Black Women's Mental Health Conference, May 4
Hosted by New York University, this is a one-day event to tackle issues of mental wellness and health that uniquely affect Black women and girls. The keynote speaker for this year is Kim Young, MSW, LCSW, founder of Dope Black Social Worker® and host of the podcast Revolutionary Hoodrat, and leading licensed professionals in the field will offer their insights and share their experiences. And, of course, no college-led event is without time blocked specifically for networking.
Strength of a Woman Festival, May 11-12
Anything with Mary J. Blige headlining or leading is a win, especially if we're talking about women's empowerment and enjoyment. This event will be held in New York City, and beyond the performances from some of our favorites like Muni Long, Jill Scott, and The Clark Sisters, there will be a Gospel Brunch. And even if you're not able to attend or concerts aren't your thing, just being in the city during that time will mean you're bound to run into plenty of other women to network with at local bars and restaurants nearby.
Carefree Black Girl Cookout, May 4
Held in the Queen City, Charlotte, N.C., this is a day festival amplifying the voices and brands of Black women entrepreneurs, artists, and creatives. There will be vendors, glam and beauty bars, and complimentary meals for the first hour (according to the platform's website). They're hosting another cookout in Philadelphia on May 25.
Black Women Leading Live, May 13-16
Touted as an “intimate retreat + conference,” this Virginia Beach, VA event will be held on a resort and is offering a professional development experience led by Laura Knights, founder of the Black Woman Leading® program and podcast. It’s an ideal fit if you’re a mid-level or senior professional, as the topics and approach are set to cater to those levels of career experience, with coaches and speakers pouring into attendees with a holistic approach.
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