My Husband & I Are On An Infinite Honeymoon To 35+ Countries
Whenever I tell someone I took a 3-year honeymoon, their reaction is usually a mix of confusion and admiration, which quickly manifests into a stream of countless questions as they try to understand how and why I've created this lifestyle.
Two years ago, I wrote an article on this same platform explaining the 'how' behind my indefinite honeymoon with my husband Jarrell. I hope to now answer the "why."
Two years out of college, I was working a career that I hated, missing my days on the yard at Howard University. My paycheck was far from fulfillment, although it afforded me my modern apartment on Wilshire Blvd in Los Angeles, weekly brunches followed by boutique shopping excursions, and regular vacations around the country. I had a lot of things, but I didn't really know who I was, or even what I wanted.
I had my life planned for as long as I could remember. First college, then a career after graduation, before marrying the perfect man, mortgaging a house, leasing a car, and having a couple of kids. These steps were securely drilled into my subconscious, but no one ever talked to me about creating the lifestyle I wanted, or defining success on my own. Everyone around me seemed to be in the same rat race, so it was easy to get comfortable in my routine.
Istanbul
Then, my life seemed as if it were going to take an adventurous and exciting turn for the best, my boss recommended me for a position in Canada! I was ecstatic at the thought of living abroad; it was always one of my dreams. I was lucky enough not to get the one thing I wanted so badly. It's funny how life works that way. Had I gotten that job, I wouldn't be in Asia now, but in that moment it seemed like the best opportunity in the world.
While not receiving that job was devastating at the time, it was just what I needed in my life, because it showed me what I truly wanted. Once I admitted to myself how strongly I desired to travel and live abroad, I could no longer deny it. So I decided to make my dream come true. I didn't need a job to send me anywhere; I could go on my own!
One day, sitting in my tiny office at the job I hated, I decided to quit my career and make my dream of traveling the world a reality. I called my sister, my best friend, and Jarrell, to share my big news. My sister and best friend thought I was crazy and tried their best to talk me off the ledge, but Jarrell thought my idea was brilliant. He was so excited for me that I thought there might be a chance he would be crazy enough to come along with me. So I proposed traveling together, and he proposed marriage.
After a wedding in Vegas, we spent a year in our hometown of Columbus, Ohio, before setting out on our indefinite honeymoon around the world. In the first year of our honeymoon, we focused on our respective passions (I am a writer, Jarrell is an artist), and not running out of money. So we traveled based on opportunities, rather than our wanderlust desires and tried to save as much money as possible, which led to the tips I share in my free eBook, 101 Ways To Travel The World For Less Than $10 A Day.
In the second year of our honeymoon, we decided we were going to travel how and where we wanted. So we focused on Jarrell's dream of entrepreneurship and launched two successful online businesses, which now afford us more of a luxury travel experience. In my article written around this time last year, I proclaimed that in 2015 we would travel to England, Paris, Amsterdam, Morocco, Greece, Turkey, Egypt, and India.
At that time we had no actual travel bookings, we simply drafted up our dream itinerary for the year and those destinations were our top choices. I am very proud to say that Egypt was the only place we missed, after falling in love with Istanbul and altering our plans. In addition, Jarrell surprised me with a weeklong trip to Rome to celebrate my birthday, with a pizza party in Naples on my actual birthday. We also visited Belgium, Germany and Kyrgyzstan briefly.
Together we have learned to prioritize each other's dreams and goals together, before achieving them as a team. We are enjoying the fruits of our labor and sacrifices, as new opportunities present themselves daily. We didn't know what we were doing, but we did it. No, it hasn't all been beautiful sunsets and beaches, but the sunset over The Arabian Sea is breathtaking, and floating in The Mediterranean Sea is magical – and those are memories we experienced together and will cherish forever.
We wanted to take the first years of our marriage to focus on us. I wanted to fall in love over and over, as we are able to be selfish and indulgent in our love. We wanted to build a family together, and we knew that would take a strong foundation. Our goal is to have our children become additions to a strong family unit, rather than the binding glue that holds us together. We know that parenthood will be an exciting and adventurous journey as well, and we look forward to sharing with our future children just how much fun we had planning for them.
Here are some of the highlights from our travels since my last article.
Paris
We celebrated Valentine's Day in Paris and had a ball getting lost on the Parisian streets, admiring the beautiful architecture.
We rented a beautiful apartment in the Latin Quarter and ate way too many baguettes and macaroons.
Morocco
Morocco was a life changing experience for us. We spent three months in the country and really fell in love with the culture, and the people.
Greece
We celebrated our third wedding anniversary on Crete, the largest Greek island. We lived in a small village and spent our time exploring and eating gyros.
The Mediterranean Sea is the most beautiful body of water I have ever seen. We regularly spent days at the beach, floating in the sea.
Istanbul
Istanbul is my favorite city in the world. The modern part of the city gives me strong NYC vibes, with a complete alternative in the old city, filled with beautiful mosques and monuments.
India
We spent Christmas and New Years in Goa, India, which is absolutely beautiful. Situated along the Arabian Sea, there are countless beaches and the food is amazing!
I can't begin to explain how beneficial our indefinite honeymoon has been for us, but I can tell you, without a doubt, that in our third year abroad we are more happy and in love than ever.
You can follow our Indefinite Honeymoon on my blog Indefinite Honeymoon.com
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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From Toxic Traits To Transformative Growth: Understanding Evolved Vs. Unevolved Zodiac Signs
Explore your sign’s 2024 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.
Have you ever heard someone talk about a certain zodiac sign and wondered why your experience of that particular sign has been completely different? We have all heard about the notorious Gemini Man or Virgo Man being a difficult partner to have in love, but does this apply to all Geminis and all Virgos? Well, this is where the discussion of evolved signs vs. unevolved signs comes in. It’s the idea that, while some toxic or challenging traits are more prevalent in certain signs, it also depends on the individual at hand and on whether or not they have evolved in life.
Evolved vs. Unevolved Signs: A Guide
Astrology is life-changing not only because it allows you to learn more about yourself, but it also allows you to see certain behaviors or traits in yourself, and change them if you are not happy with the way they manifest in your life. To be evolved means to learn and develop. In order to tell whether you are dealing with an evolved sign or an unevolved sign, look at the way they navigate their strengths and weaknesses. We are all predisposed to certain behaviors aligned with our zodiac sign; it’s how you grow from your experiences rather than what you accept as a defining characteristic of who you are.
Evolved signs have done the inner work, unevolved signs make excuses for their behavior.
When we are talking about evolved zodiac signs, we are talking about the Virgo who appreciates progress more than perfection, the Libra who trusts that they can stick to a decision rather than accepting they are incapable of making the best one, and the Aries who takes intentional action rather than an impulsive one. It’s those people you meet and they make you change your perspective on a certain sign you may have had a negative experience with in the past. An unevolved sign, however, is the Aquarius who isolates rather than expresses how they are feeling, the Scorpio who lets their jealousy get the best of them rather than trusting their connections, and the Leo who puts their ego before anything else.
The good news is that if you feel you are living a more unevolved version of your zodiac sign, you can change this by first addressing where you may be self-sabotaging, and where you can highlight more of your strengths. Healing from past traumas, seeking a therapist or astrologer, or overall making your well-being more of a priority all will benefit. When you are feeling good within, you attract more experiences to you to where you can be that evolved version of yourself rather than entertain old habits or ways of relating that don’t serve you.
It takes work, but the more you tap into the evolved version of yourself and strengthen this part of you, the less you will revert to your old ways or attract those same types of toxic or unevolved people towards you.
So, how do you know which side of the coin you are dealing with or are yourself? Read below to find out more about the traits and characteristics of the evolved vs. unevolved signs of the zodiac.
EVOLVED ARIES
- Confident
- Methodical
- Disciplined
- Leader
- Energetic
UNEVOLVED ARIES
- Aggressive
- Short-tempered
- Reckless
- Arrogant
- Impulsive
You’ll know whether you are dealing with an evolved Aries versus an unevolved Aries through the way they communicate and approach others. If they are confident and encouraging, you are dealing with an evolved Aries who is comfortable with who they are but also doesn't feel the need to force their energy on you. Unevolved Aries will make you take a step back, evolved Aries will make you want more. Aries’ strengths are that they are bold and assertive, but an unevolved Aries tends to create more disagreements or challenges with others in the process.
EVOLVED TAURUS
- Abundance-mindset
- Grounded
- Generous
- Compassionate
- Trustworthy
UNEVOLVED TAURUS
- Materialistic
- Stubborn
- Lazy
- Vengeful
- Envious
An evolved Taurus versus an unevolved Taurus can be differentiated by the person who has stability or who has goals in life that they share with you and are working towards. The unevolved Taurus you will most likely find on the couch, demanding that you give them what they need at the same time. Unevolved Tauruses tend to show traits of envy or jealousy when you are explaining a recent win to them. An evolved Taurus will be the first person you want to go to with the good news, and they are a big support and secure person to their loved ones.
EVOLVED GEMINI
- Communicative
- Curious
- Creative
- Innovative
- Fun
UNEVOLVED GEMINI
- Confusing
- Chaotic
- Disorganized
- Bored
- Unpredictable
An evolved Gemini will have you feeling understood, heard, and inspired. They are fun and light-hearted people to be around. An unevolved Gemini will have you questioning them, life, and everything in between- and will create unneeded chaos in your life. Unevolved Geminis are notorious for being unavailable and disloyal in relationships, and you can tell the difference between whether they are evolved or not by what they do when they are bored. Do your Gemini create or connect, or do they do something destructive, leaving you feeling a deep sense of distrust around them?
EVOLVED CANCER
- Compassionate
- Nostalgic
- Supportive
- Nourishing
- Protective
UNEVOLVED CANCER
- Moody
- Holds a grudge
- Pessimistic
- Manipulative
- Clingy
An evolved Cancer leaves you feeling supported, nourished, and loved. An unevolved Cancer may make you feel the same way, but will be hot and cold on when and how they show it. An evolved Cancer will be your go-to and someone you can trust with basically anything. An unevolved Cancer, however, you will steer away from and not want to express yourself to them for fear of them making things worse. Evolved Cancers understand their emotions, unevolved Cancers let their emotions get the best of them.
EVOLVED LEO
- Self-confident
- Passionate
- Generous
- Motivating
- Kind-hearted
UNEVOLVED LEO
- Entitled
- Angry
- Selfish
- Controlling
- Dramatic
Evolved Leo has an evolved ego. They have a strong sense of self, they know who they are and what they want, but they don’t let that get in the way of how they treat others. Unevolved Leos command the room in a way where you are looking at them in shock rather than in awe. Unevolved Leos think the world revolves around them, evolved Leos think the same thing but also want other people to be in that world or think the same thing about themselves as well. Evolved Leos are like the Sun, and you will feel enlivened in their presence.
EVOLVED VIRGO
- Organized
- Caring
- Down-to-Earth
- Inspiring
- Helpful
UNEVOLVED VIRGO
- Perfectionist
- Overly critical
- Resentful
- Anxious
- Cynical
The easiest way to tell the difference between an evolved Virgo and an unevolved Virgo is the way they make you feel. If they make you feel inspired and like you can accomplish or experience great things, you are dealing with an evolved Virgo. If they are overly critical of everything you do, you are dealing with an unevolved Virgo. Evolved Virgos help you grow, unevolved Virgos tend to make you feel incapable of that. Evolved Virgos can laugh off or let go of the little things, unevolved Virgos will get caught up in them.
EVOLVED LIBRA
- Relationship-oriented
- Balanced
- Charming
- Diplomatic
- Fair
UNEVOLVED LIBRA
- Codependent
- People-pleaser
- Flaky
- Indecisive
- Dishonest
Evolved Libras make some of the best partners, friends, and confidants. Unevolved Libras make some of the hardest of the above to maintain. The difference between the two is the Libra's ability to find the balance between their needs and the needs of others. Libras are relationship-oriented people, but unevolved Libras tend to let this trait get the best of them and will be in and out of relationships and never really settle down to figure out what they truly want and need. Evolved Libras love, but will not sacrifice their sense of self in the process.
EVOLVED SCORPIO
- Passionate
- Mysterious
- Intuitive
- Transformative
- Resilient
UNEVOLVED SCORPIO
- Obsessive
- Secretive
- Reclusive
- Destructive
- Ruthless
The difference between an evolved Scorpio and an unevolved Scorpio is their ability to let go. Evolved Scorpios have learned from their past and have made their life better in the process. Unevolved Scorpios hold onto a lot of resentments and often cause themselves or others emotional turmoil. Evolved Scorpios can let people in and make some of the most loyal, protective, and supportive partners. Unevolved Scorpios tend to be very distrustful of others and have a hard time letting go of control in any way or letting people get close to their inner world.
EVOLVED SAGITTARIUS
- Outgoing
- Optimistic
- Spiritual
- Adventurous
- Genuine
UNEVOLVED SAGITTARIUS
- Dramatic
- Brash
- Superiority-complex
- Unreliable
- Careless
The evolved Sagittarius are inspiring, optimistic, and hopeful. The unevolved Sagittarius is just about the complete opposite of that. Evolved Sagittariuses have learned to fuel their adventurous spirit with intentional action rather than recklessness, and are there for their loved ones rather than leaving people hanging or being unreliable. Unevolved Sagittariuses can be very rude and aggressive and will mask this behavior with humor. They can be very harsh, rather than the evolved Sagittarius who is still outgoing, but is also genuine and confident and aligned with their highest self.
EVOLVED CAPRICORN
- Hard-working
- Loyal
- Stable
- Sensible
- Ambitious
UNEVOLVED CAPRICORN
- Workaholic
- Unforgiving
- Rigid
- Stubborn
- Dominating
When you are looking at an evolved Capricorn, you find yourself in the presence of someone loyal, hardworking, and down-to-earth. An unevolved Capricorn can be judgemental and cold, with only their personal goals in mind. Unevolved Capricorns seem to be stuck in the same place in life, and unmoving in what they believe is best for them. Evolved Capricorns are open to feedback and are flexible enough to figure out what is truly best for them, to explore, and to allow someone else to lead them at times. Evolved Capricorns are responsible and productive but take care of their well-being in the process.
EVOLVED AQUARIUS
- Freedom-oriented
- Logical
- Friendly
- Open-minded
- Outgoing
UNEVOLVED AQUARIUS
- Distant
- Cold
- Disloyal
- Detached
- Superiority-complex
Evolved Aquarius and unevolved Aquarius are mirrors of each other. The evolved version of Aquarius is friendly, open-minded, and supportive of not only themselves but of others as well. The unevolved version of Aquarius can be quite distant and detached from their relationships and life altogether and can be hard for people to get close to. Evolved Aquariuses value their independence, but don't use escapist behavior as an excuse for their actions. Unevolved Aquariuses will leave someone on read for months instead of just telling someone how they feel.
EVOLVED PISCES
- Loving
- Intuitive
- Compassionate
- Creative
- Romantic
UNEVOLVED PISCES
- Consuming
- Escapist
- Moody
- Distant
- Unrealistic
Evolved Pisces are the artists, muses, lovers, and dreamers. Unevolved Pisces may have that same creative energy but tend to wear rose-colored glasses that get them into trouble in the process. Pisces are hard to grasp in the first place with their fluid, mutable nature, but an unevolved Pisces will make that distance feel like miles. Unevolved Pisces can get pretty messy and will act out on their emotions without getting the full picture or giving themselves time to sort things through. Evolved Pisces on the other hand, let their emotions inspire them and know how to step into their true power.
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